MissManaged

Chapter Eleven

Charlotte

Tobin asked the question nonchalantly, like the answer wasn’t important to our future, but his penetrating stare showed me the truth.

How I answered this question would determine where we went from here.

Too bad I didn’t know. And as much as I didn’t want to ruin our evening, I had to tell him the truth.

“I’m not a hundred percent against it, like I was before. But I can’t say I’m fully onboard yet, either,” I admitted, then braced for his reaction. But he only nodded, his face giving nothing of his thoughts away.

“That’s fair and I appreciate you being honest with me. It’s a big mindset shift and I know your past makes it difficult for you to agree to let me be in charge.” He paused and took a drink, clearly gathering his thoughts. “What do you need to be more comfortable? How can I show you that this will work between us?”

I took my time considering his questions, forcing myself to consider the possibilities and not just give him a knee-jerk reaction.

“I think I just need us to spend time together, to get to know one another more. To date, to build trust. I have a lot of damage from my father and you just telling me you won’t be like him isn’t enough to erase those fears.” I held my breath as I waited for his response.

“So, I need to prove myself to you, first,” he said, thoughtfully then chuckled when I nodded. “My father would be laughing his ass off right now if he was here.”

“How come?” I asked, more than a little relieved that he’d taken my response so well. I didn’t really think Tobin would fly off the handle and start yelling at me in the middle of a crowded restaurant, but my father would have.

“I’ve always been a bit cocky.”

I gasped and gave him big eyes. “No, not you?”

“I know, it’s hard to believe, right?” I giggled at his comment, which made him smile. “But yeah, I’ve had a tendency to be kind of boastful and overly confident, but if it makes you feel better, I’ve had my arrogance slap me in the face a few times over the years. For some reason, it’s been difficult to get rid of the habit. The fact that you’re making me prove myself is life’s way of showing me I need to support my words with actions.”

“I’m sorry…” I started, but he cut me off.

“No. Don’t be sorry. It’s good that you’re standing up for yourself and setting boundaries. I don’t ever want you to give in because you’re afraid to tell me what you need. And maybe this will finally break me of the bad habit I have of running my mouth without thinking things through. Like I did the first time we met.” He sighed and gave me a rueful grin. “I wish I hadn’t acted like such an ass then.”

I reached over and put my hand on top of his. “I think we’re all a work in progress and it’s okay to make mistakes as long as we grow and learn from them. And I like that we’ve gotten to know each other as professionals, and then as friends, and now we’ll get to know each other in other ways.” My cheeks burned at the implication in my words, but I wasn’t going to take them back. I wanted this man like I’d never wanted a man before.

“Oh, yeah?” he asked, intertwining our fingers and leaning towards me. “Is there something you want to learn about me tonight, little fairy?”

Sex dripped off his words and the heat in his gaze made me squeeze my thighs together, but I responded with an impish, “Maybe.”

He squeezed my hand but before he could say anything else, the waitress arrived with our food, forcing him to sit back, but he didn’t release my hand. Just moved it down to the seat, still clasped in his.

Unfortunately, he had to let go so we could eat but we spent the entire meal exchanging heated glances that kept the fire burning in my belly at a low simmer.

We both declined dessert and a second drink and before I knew it, we were on the way back to my place. I might have had reservations about agreeing to a full-fledged domestic discipline relationship with Tobin, but I had no qualms about letting him in my bed.

He pulled into the driveway and parked but didn’t shut off the truck.

“Are you going to invite me in, Charlotte?” he asked, voice heavy with need.

“I thought you were only going to call me that when I’m being bad,” I asked, unable to resist teasing him.

He undid his seatbelt and turned to face me. “I said I’d use your full name when you’re being naughty, Charlotte, and I’m sure you’re full to the brim with naughty thoughts. Maybe overflowing. I can feel them from over here.”

“You can feel my thoughts?” I asked, my breaths coming quicker as my pulse sped up. His assessment was spot on. So many dirty thoughts bubbled in my brain, one right after the next.

He bit his lower lip, drawing my attention there, and nodded. “Are you going to invite me in, Charlotte?” he asked again.

“Please come in, Tobin.” It came out somewhere between a demand and a plea, but it got the job done. He shut off the truck and jumped out, striding around the front of the vehicle with purposeful steps. He was a man on a mission, and I was his target.

He swung my door open and helped me down without a word, guiding me up the walkway to my front door with a hand on my lower back.

I let us in the front door, which he closed and locked behind us, leaving us standing in my living room, facing each other, two feet apart. The need I felt coursing through my body was reflected in his rigid stance and clenched fists, but neither of us spoke for an excruciating long time as the tension built.

“Do you want something to drink?” I finally asked, unable to hold still any longer. I needed to do something.

“No.” He inhaled and let out his breath slowly. “I’d rather see your bedroom. If you’d like to show it to me.”

I appreciated his restraint and respect, but it was unnecessary. I knew where this was going, where I wanted it to go, and I wouldn’t have invited him in otherwise.

“Yes.”

My whispered response flipped a switch in Tobin. The polite gentleman disappeared, replaced with a ravenous male that made me shiver from the intensity of his hungry gaze.

“Don’t be scared,” he murmured, taking a step toward me, and then another. Only stopping when we were toe to toe. “I won’t hurt you.”

I gulped and took a deep breath. “I know you won’t hurt me. I’m just a little nervous.” His eyes narrowed and he went to back off, but I stopped him. “And I’m very aroused.”

He didn’t move away, but he didn’t get any closer either. It looked like I was going to have to be brave and take the lead.

“Come with me.” I slid my palm into his hand and twined our fingers together. “Please.”

I tugged and he followed, not saying a word but not resisting, either. We reached my bedroom, and I pulled him down to sit next to me on the edge of the bed.

“Turn on the light. Please.” The rich sound of his voice soothed my nerves.

I reached over and turned on the lamp next to the bed, illuminating the room in a soft glow.

“Come here.” He held out his hand and I didn’t hesitate to grab hold, thankful he was taking the lead.

I’d gotten us in the room, but I needed him to direct where we’d go next. I might not want someone dictating every moment of my life, but here? Here, I wanted his guidance.

He pulled me to stand between his knees then down to perch on one leg.

Tobin cupped my cheek with his right hand and turned my face so we were eye to eye, only inches apart.

“I want you, Charlotte, maybe more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life, but I want to be sure you want this, too. That I’m not rushing you or you’re letting your… arousal talk you into something you’ll regret in the morning.” I blushed when he repeated my words and tried to avert my gaze, but he wouldn’t let me. “Don’t be embarrassed. I’m very aroused, too.” He nodded down to his lap where I could see the proof of his statement. “So, I want to make sure this is what you want. Do you want me to make love to you until neither of us can remember our names and we both pass out from exhaustion? Or do you want me to tuck you into bed and kiss you good night, leaving you to dream about me all night? I won’t be upset if you choose option two.”