Shelaine
My heart is about to fly out of my chest. My worst fears and secret longings are true. But what am I supposed to do? Will Luke actually help reconnect me with my family? Will they even care? So many thoughts swirl about my head like a fog, and they’re just as ephemeral. They’re half-thoughts. Nothing fully formed, but still enough that they make me gasp.
Luke a dad? Can I even trust him with that role? Doctor Bradley shuffles about, moving some things about the room before handing me a medical gown. I clutch it in my hands and look up at him in confusion. If I’m just pregnant, why do I need this? Or is he checking for other issues? It was my understanding that the obstetrician would be the one examining me.
“I’m assuming you want to hear the heartbeat. Yes? To do that, I’ll need to go up through your pussy. Pretty sure Luke won’t want me just lifting up your dress.”
It’s all becoming so very real, and I don’t even know what to think. Either way, Luke will be very unhappy. He’s made it perfectly clear that he doesn't like Doctor Bradley or his methods. Part of me just wants to wait until I see an obstetrician, but the need to know that everything is okay outweighs my discomfort.
“Can’t you just do the tummy thing? I’d feel much more comfortable with that.”
“This way will be the most accurate and clear, especially if you’re just barely along. Unless you can tell me when you conceived.”
“I -. Well -. I was a virgin until I was claimed by Luke, so I’m assuming six weeks or less?”
“Got it. Then transvaginal ultrasound it is.” With a smile that should be comforting, he reaches out and pats my arm. “I promise to keep this clinical and professional. I don’t have a pregnancy fetish, so don’t worry.”
With a jerk of his hands, he pulls out a set of stirrups, making the gurney look more like the one in my gynecologist's office. Perhaps if I can just put myself into that mind frame and refuse to think about the various sexual acts Doctor Bradley has performed in this room, then I can get through this.
After checking them over, he slides them back in before grabbing a blanket and laying it on top. The moment he hands me the gown, he turns and heads toward the door to give me privacy.
“Just like the gyno. Put on the robe, then get up on the gurney. I’ll pull the stirrups back out once Luke is in here.”
Hands trembling, I take my dress off and lay it over a chair before pulling the gown on. Walking over to a nearby mirror, I open up the front and stare down at my stomach before gliding my hand over the flat surface. It’s so hard to even picture myself being pregnant.
I close it up and crawl back onto the gurney and wait for Doctor Bradley and Luke to come back in. My fingers pluck at the soft blanket as I try to make sense of everything. I still feel like a kid myself, and here I am, pregnant.
“Ahh. I see you’re ready. Perfect.” Doctor Bradley steps in and holds the door open for Luke before walking over to me.
Luke’s face is pulled down in a serious frown, his lips twisted in a deep scowl. He looks far angrier than when he left. No doubt Doctor Bradley told him what has to be done. I knew Luke wouldn’t like it, but to have a chance of seeing our baby, of hearing the heartbeat, I would be willing to do almost anything.
Without saying a word, he drags the ultrasound machine over, pulls on the stirrups, and motions for me to slide forward. Once my feet slide into the grooves, I’m able to let my mind drift away, at least until Doctor Bradley lifts the blanket up and exposes me.
Until now, besides the other doctors, no one else has seen me like this. It feels invasive, humiliating, but I know it’s just because it’s Doctor Bradley. I’m sure if it was my normal gynecologist or even the obstetrician, I wouldn’t feel this way. But I can’t help it. Word of his sexual exploits gets around.
“Remember, Doc,” Luke growls. “No funny business.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he retorts back. “You do realize I don’t go after claimed women, right? I may enjoy defiling women in this office, but none of them have any claim. Not only is Shelaine your submissive, but she’s also your wife. I want nothing to do with her.”
Pausing for a moment, Doctor Bradley looks up at me from in between my splayed thighs before continuing. “No offense, of course.”
“None taken.” And honestly, I’m not at all offended. I’d rather him look at me like some untouchable being than a viable conquest.
With a shake of his head, Luke comes over to the other side and slips his hand in mine before giving it a soft squeeze. I lean against his arm, soaking in his strength as Doctor Bradley squirts some gel into his hand. I know what’s about to happen next, and I hate it. Even at the gynecologist, this was always the worst part.
Sure enough, he slides his fingers deep inside me, spreading the slipper jelly around, but he doesn’t do anything to try and arouse me. His movements are clinical, methodical. It’s not good enough for Luke, though. He turns his eyes away from what the doctor’s doing and onto me, squeezing my hand impossibly tight.
I don’t want to tell Luke that he’s hurting me because the truth of the matter is, I need that bite of pain to help ground me, to get my thoughts from spiraling out of control. It keeps me from crying out when Doctor Bradley shoves the ultrasound deep inside, pushing it against my uterus.
Soon, my heartbeat, deep and frantic sounds out in the room. But underneath that, so soft I can barely hear it, is another heartbeat. It’s beating far faster than mine. So small, but strong.
“Everything sounds normal,” Doctor Bradley murmurs, as if he doesn’t want to break the spell of this moment. “Do you want to see it?”
Turning the screen, I watch in fascination as the small jellybean moves about, almost jumping, like it hates Doctor Bradley for disturbing it.
“So you’re what’s been making me sick, huh?” Tears sting my eyes as I stare at the small life growing inside me. “Hi. Hi there, little bean. Hi.”
Tears and laughter burst out of me as I continue to stare at the monitor. Elations and disbelief swirl through my system, sending so many conflicting emotions through my brain. But it’s official. I’m pregnant. Looking up at Luke, I catch what looks like a tear slipping from his eyes, but he moves, making it disappear. Perhaps it was just wishful thinking.
With a far gentler touch than earlier, Doctor Bradley pulls the ultrasound out, quieting the room so that all I can hear is our combined breathing. With a slight nod, he turns to the desk and starts to scribble on a pad.
“Here’s the number to an obstetrician nearby. I respect her highly. You’ll want to get set up with her for your prenatal care. I can help with questions or emergency situations, but you’ll want to get on a routine with regular ultrasounds, blood work, and things like that. Other than that, you seem to be in good health. Let me know if you have any other concerns.”
With a brisk nod of his head, Doctor Bradley steps out, leaving Luke and me alone. The happy feelings start to dissipate as I stare at him pacing. Finally, he stops for a moment and walks over to the nearby paper towel dispenser, and grabs a handful before making his way back to me.
Without saying a word, he starts to clean me up, wiping off as much of the goo as he can get to. It’s such a tender, endearing moment and one that I wasn’t expecting. I make a move to slide my feet out of the stirrups, but Luke stops me, grabbing my ankles and holding on.
“I need you to hear me, Shelaine.” Luke’s voice is harsh, ragged, and full of more emotion than I’ve ever heard from him before. “I may not know how to be a dad, but I can guarantee you that our child will want for nothing. I -. I’ll need help. I’ll need you to be my guiding light, helping me navigate this. Think you can do that for me, rabbit?”
Luke’s eyes bore into mine, and I see it then. That desperation, that need to make everything right. It doesn’t matter that things were so fucked up before; he wants them to be better. He wants us to be better. Not only for me but for our baby too.
Unable to speak, I hold out my arms to him, smiling as he races over and slams into me, forcing my head onto his chest. No tears fall from my eyes; I have none left to cry, but being here in the safety of Luke’s arms, I feel like I can finally trust that things will start to go right.
It’s even better than when we were dating. I feel connected to him in a way that wasn’t there before. I’m not sure if it’s because of the baby or if it’s because we’ve finally burst through that wall between us, but I can’t imagine feeling any happier than I do at this very moment. I don’t know his past. I don’t know what happened, but the fact that he’s standing here, asking me for help, speaks volumes.
His fingers dig into me, not hard enough to hurt, but anchoring, securing. Despite the fatigue, despite the terror of knowing that I’m pregnant, arousal floods my system. This is the first time since he forced me down the aisle that he’s actually touching me with something other than anger or despair. I won’t say that it’s love because I don’t know if he’s even capable of it, but it’s tender and emotional.
Pushing my back down onto the gurney, he prowls around toward the front, where my legs are still lifted high in the air. Standing on the small step at the base, he leans over, resting his head on my stomach. The soft smile that crosses his lips before he kisses my belly makes me want to tear up all over again.
But when he shifts his body, grinding his clothed hips against my naked core, need shoots into me. I need this. I need this connection. It’s as if this is life-affirming, a coming together of bodies and souls.
His fingers slide in between us and stroke over my clit, forcing my body to arch up. “Since you’re carrying my baby, I’m going to be far gentler with you. But make no mistake, Shelaine Lannister, once you’ve recovered from the birth, my fingers, my cock, my knives, every bit of me will be on you, in you, binding you further to me.”
I groan at his filthy words, my heart pounding for a completely different reason. The baby seems to have changed everything. No longer am I afraid of him. Coming together like this shows me just what I’ve been missing. Yes, we’ve had sex, but not like this. Not with us both willing to meet each other halfway.
In this way, we’re equals, both of us needing each other with a desperation that defies all logic. We’re both equally unsure of where our lives will take us and how things will end up being with a baby. For the first time, we’re both in the same place, starting over new.
Ducking lower, he slides two fingers inside me and curls them up in that delicious way that I crave. When his tongue dances along my clit, I see stars. I don’t want this moment to ever end. I don’t care that he’s bringing me to orgasm in Doctor Bradley’s office. If the rumors are to be believed, the good doctor doing far worse behind these doors.
Honestly, I don’t even care if he’s in the back area, jacking off as he watches us through the two-way mirror. All I care about is the longing thrumming through my body as Luke slams his fingers into me. Groaning, I reach down between my legs and run my fingers through his thick hair before gripping it in my ecstasy.