Right. Break in next door without getting caught. The basement windows were out of the question, since they all had bars, and seeing as how TIN had yet to issue them with any nifty gadgets, Sloane had to think of another way in.
Just his luck, one of his neighbors, Sandra, headed in his direction. She waved as she went up the stairs. Well, it was time to do this. He quickly jogged over, flashing his brightest smile.
“Hey, Sandra. Do you know if Brian’s in? He borrowed my power drill, and I need it to fix a loose shelf before Dex gets home. It’s been driving him nuts.”
Sandra smiled brightly at him. “I’m not sure, but why don’t you go ahead,” she said, standing to one side of the open front door.
“Thanks. You’re a lifesaver.” He slipped inside and turned to give her his most appreciative smile. “If I don’t get this thing fixed, I’m going to end up in the dog house. Or the cat house, I guess.”
Sandra giggled before waving at him and heading upstairs. As soon as she was out of sight, Sloane waited until he heard her apartment door close before turning to Brian’s apartment. He leaned in, listening for any signs Brian might be home. It was doubtful, since their young neighbor was most likely out with his girlfriend. Sloane rapped gently on the door. As a Felid, Brian had exceptional hearing. If he was home, he’d have heard Sloane.
How many times had he told Brian he needed to change his door? This one was total shit, with a crappy lock. All it took was one forceful push of Sloane’s shoulder, and the door was open. He quietly closed it behind him and stilled, listening for any movement. When he heard nothing, he moved around the tiny apartment. He couldn’t imagine where an agent would find a place to hide in here unless they also happened to be a contortionist. Nonetheless, he checked every nook and cranny, while also listening to Dex on the other end of Sloane’s earpiece.
“Holy fuck.”
Sloane straightened, his heart pounding. “What is it? Did you find the agent?”
“No, but I found something even better. Dude, Mrs. Bauman’s into BDSM.”
“What?” Sloane let out a breath he hadn’t even realized he’d been holding.
“Mrs. Bauman. She has an entire closet full of leather stuff, paddles, whips….”
“Why are you searching Mrs. Bauman’s closet?”
“For our guy, or girl, agent.”
“And a highly skilled enemy agent is going to be hiding in Mrs. Bauman’s closet?” Maybe they were taking a page out of Dex’s book. Dexter J. Daley’s 101 Places to Hide If You Want to Get Caught. Number 1. Bedroom Closet. Sloane let out a snort at the memory of a naked Dex hiding from Ash in the bedroom closet back when they’d thought they were being sneaky about their relationship. Of course the closet was the first place Ash looked.
Dex let out a bark of laughter. “Oh my God!”
“What now?” Sloane was going to strangle him.
“Mrs. Bauman has a strap-on.”
“I did not need to know that.”
“Ooh yeah, get your freak on, Mrs. Bauman. Just goes to show, you’re never too old to get jiggy with it. Man, I hope we’re this adventurous when we get to her age. We’re probably going to need a little something-something to help with the, uh, you know, gravity, but we can make it work. Shit. What if Mrs. Bauman is the agent?”
“Really?”
“Think about it, Sloane. She always happens to pop up when I’m either compromised or half-naked.”
“I think that says more about you than it does our elderly neighbor.”
“I bet her walking that tiny prehistoric dog—which I’m convinced is some kind of wingless pterodactyl—is her doing surveillance. She’s probably got all kinds of explosives hidden in her housedress. Have you seen how ginormous the pockets are?”
“You’re ridiculous.”
“Am I, Sloane? Am I really?”
“Yes.”
“Fine, but when she springs out at you like the wrinkly ninja she is and tries to strangle you with her hairnet, don’t say I didn’t warn you. I bet those rollers are actually grenades.”
“Stop talking.” Sloane heard a board creak up in the ceiling. “Um, Dex.”
“A lot of people would probably be grossed out by Mrs. Bauman’s sexual prowess, but she’s a mature woman. A very, very, very, very mature woman. But who says she’s not allowed to have some fun? People are so judgey.”