Lana
I made a mistake. I let things get too far and now, I was living the consequences of my actions. As each day continued to pass by, my feelings grew for Carter. At this point, I was beginning to suspect I was falling in love with him.
I wasn’t allowed to fall in love with Carter Pratt. He was a man that I would work under until the end of my summer vacation. If feelings were to blossom, how was I supposed to deal with them when I had to leave?
We both knew the end was coming sooner than later. Still, we couldn’t help ourselves.
If we were ever caught alone together, neither of us had the strength to stop ourselves from touching the other. Touches would lead to doing something more dangerous. Sex made things speed up with complications.
Despite knowing I shouldn’t have let myself feel so good the first time, I was too greedy to stop either of us from letting it happen again and again.
I didn’t know what to do.
Sitting in front of a blank canvas, I waited for some sort of inspiration to come flooding toward me. Instead, I felt empty. The feeling felt foreign after Carter had made me so happy ever since I’d come back.
While I sat there in silence, my phone buzzing in my pocket was all it took for my attention to draw away from my own personal sorrows.
It was my roommates’ group chat. With my mind so wrapped around Carter, I hardly even noticed the messages sent throughout the last few months. I missed the different pictures sent from the other three. I didn’t even know how great their vacations were going.
I noticed the newest message was from Piper. She was the one who went to the beach to enjoy her vacation. She lived the lie I gave them all before I left. Expecting some sort of message describing how good of a time she was having, I didn’t expect to see so many crying emojis.
Apparently, she wasn’t having a good time at all.
Scrolling through the group chat, I realized her trip hadn’t been good from the very beginning. From a breakup text to hook up gone right, I guess I didn’t have too much to complain about.
From the looks of it, Piper was in the same situation I was in. Whoever she hooked up with stuck around, and now she had to say goodbye as well.
If half of us were leaving heartbroken, I hoped the other half would be able to return unscathed.
Groaning out, I typed away my own messages. Firstly, I apologize for being so distant, and went ahead and confess the truth to them. I told them about Carter, the man I shouldn’t have messed around with from the very start.
Before I got to ask the other two how they were doing, I heard footsteps growing from the distance. Tucking my phone away, I tried to force a smile onto my lips.
I didn’t want Carter to realize how I felt. Knowing him, he’d blame himself and try to apologize for everything we’d done. I wasn’t sorry for falling for him, I didn’t want to hear him say the opposite.
When he appeared, my heart leaped straight into my throat, making it hard to swallow. He was wearing sweats and a loose T-shirt. Knowing he felt comfortable enough to show me what he looked like wearing his sleepwear, it was hard not to feel special.
He strolled over next to me and looked at my blank canvas. From it to me, I already saw the concern forming in his gaze.
“Is everything okay?”
I swear, he could read me like an open book.
Over the weeks, I watched Carter morph into a new person. When I first met him, he acted like a person who only cared about himself. Now, he cared about me as well. It was the little things that made me fall for him.
“I’m fine,” I lied as I forced my smile to grow. “It’s nothing to worry about.”
He didn’t look satisfied with my answer. Moving to sit next to me, his hands automatically went to my thigh. Giving my leg a squeeze, the look of concern made my resolve crumble.
“Tell me what’s wrong, Lana.” His order was soft and gentle, making it impossible to lie.
“We don’t have much time together,” I whispered. Not wanting it to be true, I couldn’t stop myself from frowning. Now that I’d said the words out loud, I wouldn’t be able to take them back.
While one hand caressed my thigh, the other hand brushed my hair from my cheek. Looking at my red-stained cheeks, he used one of his fingers to tilt my chin in his direction.
He kissed me without another word passing by between us. At first, I thought it was a way to make me stop talking. But feeling the way his hands held me, I could feel the desperation behind his actions.
He didn’t want me to go either. By the end of this, we were both going to be heartbroken.
When he parted away, his thumb brushed across my bottom lip.
“We still have a little bit of time left to enjoy each other. When that time is up, that doesn’t mean that we are finished, Lana. I’d never kick my beautiful painter out.” He even offered a smile to help me feel a little better about the situation we were in.
“I could stay,” I offered. “I don’t even have to go back.”