Bare Yourself (Consumed)

Chapter Eighteen

Willow

I hang my head, my hair curtaining my face, as the water sluices over my shoulders. My tears mix with the stream of water. I feel exhausted and boneless, and I wonder how my legs are keeping me up. The stress of the day is catching up with me fast. Seeing my brother again, and the condition he was in, worse than the last time I saw him, was a big hit to my emotions. He looked broken and utterly defeated.

I feel a whoosh of cold air seconds before warm arms wrap around me. When I first came to take a shower, Tegan wanted to join me. I told him I needed time to myself. I needed to process what happened today. Now that he’s here, I’m beyond grateful. It’s like he knew I needed him, even when I didn’t realize it myself.

I sag back in his arms, and he accepts my weight as his own. A new flood of tears drips down my cheeks as relief, fear, and unimaginable gratitude consume me. Relief for my brother finally admitting and accepting help, fear that he won’t follow through, and gratitude for having a rock in the form of Tegan. I have no clue what I would have done without him, and I’m so grateful I didn’t have to find out.

A sob escapes my lips and more of my weight settles back against him.

“Willow,” he whispers, the sound coming out tortured, like he can’t handle seeing me in pain. His arms tighten around me.

I lean my head back against his shoulder, and the water now hits my chest. Tegan’s forehead meets my temple and his lips rest against my cheek.

“What if you’re right? What if he can’t be saved?” I voice my fear.

Tegan loosens his arms and gently spins me around. I wrap my arms around his waist while he tips my head back so I have to look up at him.

“You can’t think like that.” His brows dip down into a frown. “I know I sounded doubtful earlier, and I still have my reservations, but he’s your brother. You know him better than I do. Pray for him, and be there for him when you can. But remember, if it doesn’t work, don’t take on that weight. It’ll hurt, but you can’t let it take away your happiness.”

I know what he’s saying, and I know he’s right, but I also know it’ll be easier said than done. Bryan is my brother, and I’ll always love him. If he hurts, I hurt. And if this doesn’t work, it’ll hurt even more, because I’ll know he wasn’t strong enough to beat the demons inside him.

My forehead drops to the center of Tegan’s chest. His arms wrap around me and he holds me against him for several moments. I love the way his arms feel wrapped around me, almost like a cocoon. I lay a soft kiss against his chest, right over his heart, then look up at him. I feel the heat in his eyes, not from desire, but from an emotion I’m almost too afraid to hope for, and suddenly I feel the need to say something.

I take a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “There’s something I want to say.”

“What is it, baby?” he asks softly, brushing back some wet hair that’s fallen in my face.

Nerves makes my stomach jittery, but the need to get this out overrides it. It’s not something I want him to know, but something I need him to know.

I keep my eyes on his. I want to see them when I say this.

“I was going to tell you the other day, but the time wasn’t right. Then I was going to wait until a better time came along, but I don’t want to wait anymore.”

Tegan’s eyes turn dark and his arms around me tighten. My breasts flatten against his chest, the bristly hair there rubbing against my nipples, making them harder than they were before. Up until now, his cock was half-hard between us, but it’s now as solid as stone.

I lick my lips nervously, although they are already wet from the spray of the water. He watches me, and I think I hear a groan from him, but I can’t be sure with the noise from the shower.

No more waiting, Willow, I tell myself. It’s time, even if the timing isn’t perfect.

“I love you,” I whisper, then force myself to not look away from him. Although the need is strong for him to know my feelings, and he’s shown me many times his feelings for me run deep, I’m still terrified he won’t feel the same.

I hold my breath and wait. What feels like ten minutes later, but in reality, had to only be two or three seconds, I’m lifted in the air and smashed against his chest as his lips take mine forcefully. The move shocks me, but only for a split second. He hasn’t been under the spray of the water, so when I thread my fingers through his hair, it’s still mostly dry. His hands grip my ass cheeks, and I slide my legs around his waist. My pussy meets his hardness, and we both moan simultaneously.

Tegan turns and my back meets the wall of the shower stall. His tongue invades my month, and I tangle mine with his. I’ve always loved the way he kisses me. He does it like I’m the best thing he’s ever tasted, and I feel the same.

When he pulls back, I nearly cry out. I wasn’t done with his mouth yet.

I’m panting, and his breathing isn’t much better when he rests his forehead against mine. We both keep our eyes on each other.

“Fuck, baby,” he groans. “I love you so goddamn much. I know you’re hurting, and if you want me to stop, I will, but hearing you say those words…” He stops and grinds his cock against me. “I need to be inside you right now.”

I fist his hair even more, bringing his face closer to mine. “Fuck me, stud. Fuck me good and hard. I need it too.”

The words barely leave my mouth before his lips are back on mine. His hips rock against me, and I’m so slick with arousal that the length of him slides between my lips. He doesn’t penetrate, just slides his cock back and forth. The friction on my clit is delicious, and I cry out hoarsely.

He yanks his lips from mine and lifts me several inches. My breasts hang in his face, so he dips his head and takes a beaded nipple in his mouth. He tugs at the tip with his teeth, just hard enough to send a small bout of pain rushing through me, then releases it to lap his tongue around the sting. He does the same to my other nipple.

“I love your tits,” he says, looking up at me after releasing the nub. He starts lowering me down his body slowly, until my slick pussy meets the head of his cock. “But I love your pussy more.”

My breath hitches when the head slides in, then it whooshes out when he lowers me even more. He’s not all the way in yet, but I already feel incredibly full. Full of Tegan is one of the best things in the world. He continues to lower me, and I stretch even more to accommodate him. His jaw turns hard and his eyes flash with unmistakable desire.

“Oh, God,” I whimper.

“Fuck yeah,” he growls, then shoves his hips forward, impaling himself the rest of the way inside my body.

Tingles, shivers, and fireworks all implode in me, centered right at the apex of my legs. Sex with Tegan has always been out of this world, but I swear every time trumps the last.

He pumps his hips forcefully, and each time he’s fully inside me, his pelvic bone hits my clit. I moan deep in my throat because it feels so damn good.

Using the strength of one arm to hold me up, he runs one hand down past my ass, his finger briefly rubbing my asshole, to my pussy. There’s a bit of pressure as he inserts his finger inside me, alongside his cock. He continues to fuck me with his cock, but holds his finger still.