Chapter 29
Brooks
I don’t know what Archer told Deacon when he canceled his contract with Blackbridge Security, but my boss never once brought me into his office to question how I royally fucked things up with the rock star. Archer was mad that day I left weeks ago, but he must’ve kept that anger to himself.
I don’t know if my boss is just distracted with being a father, but he didn’t argue with me when I told him I needed a break from the pretend relationships. He put me on an assignment that was strictly security for a man who has had problems with an online stalker. Wren found no real threat, but the man was insistent. I’ve spent weeks sitting outside his office and driving him to and from work. I’m providing a service I’ve done a hundred times, but my job no longer has the same appeal. I don’t get up in the morning ready to face the day, and I know that has a lot to do with the man infiltrating my dreams and every other damn waking moment. That job ended yesterday, and for once in my time with Blackbridge Security, I’m not looking forward to the next assignment. I hate having to smile and pretend all is right in my world when it isn’t.
Everyone is in love, and I’m pretty sure that Kit and Jules are dating behind everyone’s back. I catch the looks from the others in the office when they don’t think I’m looking. It may be because I’ve been nearly unbearable since Archer fired me, but I can’t help but consider that they all think I’m a shit human for the lie Jules and I have told everyone. No one has specifically asked me about the things that had to line up for me to get Kit’s dream woman pregnant. I’ve been waiting, knowing I’ll tell them the truth, but I just can’t bring myself to open my mouth and correct those lies.
Every one of these damn assholes is head over heels in love, and I’m just miserable. Even Puff Daddy, Wren’s stupid fucking bird, has Evie, Finnegan’s woman’s female parrot.
I know what I want, I just can’t have it. Happiness used to come in the form of dating, pretending, getting to taste a variety of things.
I’ve replayed that last day at Archer’s over and over. He was there for me when my head was a jumbled fucking mess. He gave me exactly what I needed, and as much as I know now that it was him that calmed my soul, him that stopped all that chatter and disappointment in my head, I can’t bring myself to call him. Knowing Archer, he blocked my fucking number anyway.
According to Wren, Archer hasn’t hired another security company. He’s been attending his therapy sessions with Dr. Kent on his own and has practically turned into a hermit.
Tabloid headlines have spiked again with people wondering about my disappearance, but Archer hasn’t opened up publicly about any of it. He has literally no social media presence, and other than the scheduled therapy appointments, he doesn’t leave his house.
He spends every second alone. There are no deliveries to his house, and that worries me. I have no idea what the man is cooking since he dismissed Cinder, his new house manager, the day after he cut ties with me.
I blame my worry, trying to convince myself that I’d feel this way about any client, instead of focusing on the fact that I just miss him. I knew we wouldn’t last, but I’d somehow managed to let myself believe we were something more. He crushed all of that with the word fake.
I shake my head, trying to focus on the folder in my hands, but I just can’t bring myself to care about the middle-aged woman who needs security details for the opening of a new museum exhibit in a few days.
Conversation goes on around me, but I’m struggling to keep up as the guys chatter. Most of the guys are here which is surprising considering it’s Saturday. The office looked exactly like this a year ago, but in recent months with each one of them pairing off with the women they plan to spend the rest of their lives with, their weekend attendance in the office has tapered dramatically. The girls must be out doing something together. It’s the only time the guys show up on their designated off days.
I pick up on the guys discussing Puff Daddy, and since I wasn’t listening to the entire conversation, I stick with saying something that works any day of the week.
“He’s a menace,” I mutter.
I feel Kit’s eyes on me, but I don’t meet them.
Our friendship has been strained since Jules’s announcement about the baby. I thought the man would have my back, but he hasn’t once stepped up and demanded she tell the truth. I know he’s afraid of losing her, but sacrificing my reputation to do it seems seriously shitty. Archer was right for not being okay with me going along with the plan.