“Who knew?”
The words echoed in his head as he drove them back to the camp. He kept a cautious eye on the sides of the road, looking for anything out of place. It kept his mind busy so he wouldn’t over think things.
Like how he’d all but rewound time at their last stop.
Why?
He had no idea.
It wasn’t the first time he’d heard her put herself down.
Back when they first met, he chalked it up to being humble. And then the more he got to know her, the more he realized that she was harder on herself than a person had a right to be. He’d suspected that it was from her childhood, but that was like breaking into Fort Knox.
She kept it locked tight.
And that was the most frustrating thing for him. He wanted to know more. He wanted to know everything about her.
What she gave him was kind of superficial.
Him? He’d spilled his guts talking about his whole life and liked that she was interested.
He leaned into a turn and felt her hold tighter to him, pressing her body against his back as if she wanted to be there.
After she’d left and his life had turned upside down, he’d played through those moments again and again. Later wondering, after he’d worked his way through half a bottle of Scotch, if she’d kept things to a minimum so she wouldn’t have to remember what was a lie and what was the truth. The less you say, the less you have to remember.
It always ate at him.
Thinking about her words.
Wondering what parts of it were lies, or if all of it was.
It had taken him a long time to think he’d come to terms with it. He’d bottled it up. Put in on the shelf.
And still, it lived inside of him.
Not just the anger.
No, it was the emptiness he felt deep inside his chest as if his heart had been ripped from his ribs and he’d gone right on living.
The emptiness on the side of his bed that hadn’t bothered him before when he’d slept sprawled across the middle.
Waking up alone.
His arm reaching for her.
It was all too much and too little at the same time.
He’d continued needing her only to have his life half-empty every day and night.
As they pulled up toward the camp, Leo felt her shift against his back, her palm sliding down his belly an inch or two. A subtle shift of movement, but he felt it in all the right places.
Or all the wrong ones.
He had to be crazy to open that door again.
He had to be stupid, loco, nuts.
He had to be a lot of things to put his heart in her hands again. So he was going to take it slow.
She straightened her posture, and he felt the press of her breasts against his back.
Who was he kidding?
Slow wasn’t their style.
Together, they were dynamite.
No, nitroglycerine.
He grinned and shifted, her hand sliding down an inch closer to his waistband.
His cock pressed hard against his zipper, eager to feel her again.
So slow wasn’t going to happen. He wasn’t that good of a person.
No, he needed to feel her naked and hungry again and soon.
But this time, he had to insist on the truth.
He’d need to know the truth about her.
The truth about him and what she’d done to pull his ass literally out of the fire.
He’d need that before he could begin to heal from the gaping hole she’d left in his life.
The only question was whether she’d be a part of his life after that.
God, he hoped so.