"Oh, yeah, sorry." Ashton passes it to him. Instead, she pats Sophia on her head. "I'd totally hug you, but I don't want you to be afraid of me."
I'm not high. Not yet, but this moment is the funniest thing I've ever seen, and I can't hold back the laughter. Which ricochets across the room, igniting an uncontrollable roll of laughter from everyone.
At that inopportune moment, clarity sobers me in an instant. "Shit."
Brendan and Lance seem to be the only ones who hear me. I stand and start pacing. "Shit."
"What's wrong?" Lance asks. "Come up here, this will mellow you out."
I stare at him and his offering of the bong, but what he says doesn't reach me. I'm too lost in my own head. Trying to figure out what the hell I should do.
"Lana?" Ashton's voice is soft and soothing. "You're looking like the angry pixie."
Brendan's beside me, carefully ushering me away. "What did you just realize?"
I peer up at him, but I can't focus. I'm completely freaking out. My head is spinning, filtering through a thousand different possibilities. My hands are sweaty, and my mouth is dry.
"C'mon," he urges, gently setting a hand on my back to guide me out of the room.
"Where are they going?" I hear Sophia ask as the door closes behind us.
"Lean back against the wall and put your head down. Take slow, deep breaths through your nose." I can hear him speaking, somewhere.
I feel the solidity of the wall to my back and a hand pressing me forward.
"Focus on your breathing. In and out."
I grip my knees as I breathe in and release each breath. The chaotic swirls dissipate. My pulse calms. And then I feel like collapsing. I slide down the wall until I'm seated on the floor.
"He goes to school here," I mutter.
Brendan lowers himself next to me. It takes h
im only a minute to realize. "The guy you're covering for?"
"Yeah," I breathe out.
It wasn't panic exactly that overtook me. It was a combination of everything--anger, frustration, annoyance and okay, maybe a little panic. It felt like I was filled with every explosive emotion that could fit inside of me. Because I have no idea what to do. And I don't do helpless well.
I continue to stare at the wall for what feels like ten minutes, trying to formulate some sort of plan.
"Is this about the convenience store or Allie?" Brendan asks from beside me. I forgot he was here.
"Allie," I answer numbly.
"Is it the same guy from the convenience store?"
I turn my head to stare at Brendan. My stony expression answers for me.
"Did that girl who called in see anything?"
I shake my head. It unnerves me how much he knows about the case.
"So it's your word against his?"
I nod.
"Why would they believe him over you?"