“I've been in charge of my life—my interests, my actions, my career—from the age of seventeen,” she said slowly, trying to find the right words. “I know I'm good at what I do. I trust myself and my decisions. It's aggravating to have someone I... I care about questioning my life choices. Can’t he just accept me for who and what I am, like I do with him? Is that too much to ask?”
He took a while chewing over her words before tilting his head. “You... care about him? Why the big pause?”
Um. “There was no pause.”
“Yeah, there was definitely a pause, and I think you know that. You know it because it seemed you were about to say something else. What were you about to say?”
Crap. Why hadn’t she remembered that first and foremost, Chester was a hard-nosed investigative reporter? “I’m not sure,” she muttered, then sighed when he continued to stare at her. “I know what you’re doing, boss. You’re the one who taught me that silence pressures people to fill it with things they might not want to reveal otherwise.”
Chester frowned but said nothing and continued to watch her.
Goddamn it. “I’m not lying. I do care about Dalton, very much. More than any other human being on earth, actually. He’s important to me. No,” she corrected herself, “he’s more than that. He’s vital to me. Vital to my existence, like air or water. I just... I-I...”
“You love him.”
“I... That’s...” She waited for the appropriate words to appear like they always did when she needed them the most. But now all she heard was Chester’s statement echoing in her ears. You love him... “That, um... that wasn’t what I was going to say.”
“I don’t see why not, since you kinda already said it. I mean, you just admitted the man is more vital to you than anyone else in your life. Sounds like love to me.”
Good grief, he wasn’t wrong. “It kind of does, doesn’t it?”
“The way I see it, the question isn’t whether or not you love him,” Chester went on, skating right by that life-altering possibility like it was no biggie. “The question is, how is this new event going to affect your life?”
“Affect my life?” she repeated, still trying to wrap her mind around the alien concept that she might be in love. “Why does it have to affect anything?”
“Because that’s just how love works—or at least it should. And in case you haven’t noticed, it’s already affected you.”
“It has? How?”
He gestured vaguely between the two of them. “For one thing, right at this moment we’re having a good old chinwag about your man, instead of bouncing ideas off each other about what subjects your podcast should cover in its first month.”
She winced. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be sorry. Be honest with yourself, and with me. How much does this guy really mean to you? Is he worth being this much of a distraction, or would you be better off cutting him loose as a bad job because he’s a drag on your career?”
“He’s not a bad job,” she returned sharply, going ramrod straight in her chair. “And far from being a drag, Dalton’s brought excitement and joy to my world, on a level I didn’t even know existed. I can’t even remember feeling alive until he came along. Not like I do now, anyway.”
Chester pondered that a moment. “So, to answer my question, he means a lot to you?”
Duh. “Yes.”
“And he’s worth all the distraction?”
“I wouldn’t call it distraction, but yes. He’s worth everything.”
“So there it is.” He nodded as if she’d said something profound. “You know, you’re lucky, knowing your own mind like you do.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean about a thousand years ago when dinosaurs were roaming the earth, I had someone in my life that was a worthy distraction. But times were different then—or maybe I was a different man than I am now,” he added with a self-deprecating grimace. “I had all the same crazy-making feelings that you have—giddy joy, amazement at how alive I felt whenever I was with her, the whole nine yards.”
The last thing she wanted to see was the shadow of melancholy in his eyes. “That sounds beautiful, boss.”
“It was. Beautiful and so rare it might as well have been a unicorn, though I didn’t know that at the time. Like any young idiot who thinks miracles drop into your lap on a daily basis, I took it for granted. I thought I’d always have that special unicorn magic in my life. And then,” he snapped his fingers, “like that, it was gone.”
“What happened?”
He lifted a shoulder. “Nothing. Which was actually the problem. I was trying to make a name for myself in this city, and every story was the most important story I’d ever worked on. I didn’t always make it home and I wouldn’t always remember to call to let her know where I was or what I was doing. I do remember missing her birthday, and a party thrown in her honor at her office when she got a huge promotion. Too busy,” he said when she simply stared at him. “And yeah, I know what that translates into. It translates into me being too busy for the one person in my life who meant everything to me. I put everything else in the world ahead of her—my career, my ambition, whatever story that caught my eye. Everything was a priority, except her. And it never occurred to me that constantly coming in last place bothered her until one day I came home and found her packing. Honest to Christ, that was my first clue she couldn’t stand our life together, but for her it was the last straw.”
The regret in his tone broke her heart. “I’m sorry, Chester.”
“Like I said, don’t be sorry,” he said, waving her words away. “Just take this as a cautionary tale, yeah? You know your man brings that special unicorn magic to your life, which means you’ve got the jump on me. But you need to get your head out of your ass when it comes to figuring out what’s going on in your heart. If you don’t, you could run the risk of losing your own unicorn, and I’ll be honest, Hannah. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.”