“How do you know, Isaiah? Wait. Is that even your real name?”
He turned again, rubbing a feeble hand down his face, trying to hide a smirk. “Yes, that’s my real name.”
Was he laughing?
I quickly stood up, feeling the tears spring back to my eyes but not because I was sad. It was because I was frustrated and angry. Everything was piling up, and if it was his goal to make me hate him, he was achieving it. It was as if he were patronizing me. Like he wanted me to lash out.
“How do you know?” I asked again, placing my hands down on the cool wood beneath my fingers. My legs were shaky, and my knees were seconds from buckling. Tobias had to be there. Because if he wasn’t, I had no freaking idea where he was.
Isaiah peered up at me behind those black-rimmed eyes. “Because I called the Covens and asked.”
Oh no. “You did what?” The question was hardly above a whisper as I sunk back down into the chair. The final string was clipped, and there it was. Disappointment. But just as soon as I let the blow hit me, I stood back up, and the anger was rushing. “Are you kidding me?!” My voice was high-pitched, and I placed my hands on my head, gripping my chestnut strands just as tightly as his father had the night before. “You called and asked for Tobias Richardson?!” Richard would know. After all, how many people would be inquiring about a Tobias Richardson? I was sure when Richard had changed our last names to his mother’s maiden name after our mother died, he had done his research.
I gasped, feeling the memory surface again. The one that I’d dug into last night. The one that told me that Richard was a part of The Covenant Psychiatric Hospital—or The Covens, as Isaiah called it. I turned my back quickly and darted away from Isaiah and his unmoving features. I ran past aisles and aisles of books until I got to the very end of the library, tucked away in the dark, as my eyes shut and I was taken back to a time when I was the most vulnerable.
“You will not get away with this, Richard.” My mother’s voice was hoarse, like she’d been yelling or maybe she had a cold. We didn’t get out much to catch the germs, but occasionally, she’d have the sniffles at night. I could hear her. I'd wake up sometimes, looking for Tobias’ warm hand. He and I shared a bed, but every once in a while, I would climb out and go into Mama’s. I sometimes felt like she needed my hand more than he did.
“You mistake me for someone who is weak, Emily.” Uncle Richard laughed, and I shut my eyes, pretending that I was asleep in the backseat. Tobias wasn’t with us. It was just Mama, me, and Uncle Richard. I peeked up when I felt a shift, and I glanced out the window, wondering how I’d gotten into the back of Uncle Richard’s car. My blanket was wrapped around me as I pulled it up to cover most of my face, seeing the blurring stars through the glass.
My mom’s voice shook, and I heard another sniffle. Maybe she was sick. I smiled a little as I thought that, maybe in the morning, I would get her some warm tea from Auntie. That would make her feel better. Of course, I would have to have Tobias help me. Auntie liked him better than me.
“Richard. You cannot take me from my children and throw me into a dungeon. My sentence is finished in a few weeks. What will the courts say when I’m missing? I appreciate that you kept me from going to prison, but this will not work.”
He laughed again, and confusion filled me. What was she talking about? Sentence? Like a sentence with words? “I own the courts, Emily. You know this, and you’d do good to be by my side. You have a face for politics. I don’t understand why you’d want any other life than the one I’m giving you.” His words cut off, and the car came to a stop. I almost fell forward onto the floor, but I pushed myself back into the leather seat, gripping my blankie as my stomach rolled. “Don’t worry, though, Princess. After you're through here, you’ll be just the way I want you. Compliant, submissive, and obedient. You’ll spread those legs when I want, hang on my arm at cocktail parties, and we will raise our children to be upstanding citizens. They will follow the rules, just as soon as their mother does.”
My eyebrows crowded as his door opened, and I quickly shut my eyes, pretending like I was asleep. I didn’t like when Uncle Richard used that tone. It scared me. He did it a lot. It made my stomach wiggly, and sometimes I would run away and hide. Tobias never hid with me, though. He stayed with Mama. He was braver than me.
“Richard, I will tell everyone in there what you’ve done to me over the years. I’m done being your little doll. You can’t groom me into what you want!” My mother’s voice shook as it grew louder, and a tear fell down my cheek. I clenched my eyes tighter as I heard the door slam, making the entire car move underneath me.
“Mama?” I whispered.
“Baby, stay asleep.”
I shut my eyes again, gripping onto my blankie. My fingers hurt from the grip, but it made me feel safe. The car door opened again, and I peeked one eye open as my mother yelped. My lips smooshed together as I saw Uncle Richard grab her by her pretty hair and drag her out of the car. More confusion filled me as I saw through the crack that her hands were in handcuffs. They looked more real than the ones that Tobias and I would use as we played cops and robbers in the backyard.
Uncle Richard shouted as he pulled her, and I wanted to scream. “If I can’t groom you, then I’ll just groom her.” The door was suddenly shut again, and I counted to five before I sat up taller with my heart feeling like I’d just run through the forest, playing hide and seek. There was a door with a green curtain-like thingy over the top, and I knew it was the door that Uncle Richard and Mama had gone through.
Mama told me to stay asleep, but Tobias wasn’t here. He couldn’t stay with her when Uncle Richard yelled. He couldn’t hold her hand. She needed me to be brave. I was going to be brave.
My hand shook on the door handle, and the cool air hit my wet face as I crawled out of the car. The pebbles below my feet dug in as I tiptoed over to the door that they had gone into. I looked behind me and saw my blanket half hanging out, so I ran back over, pretending that my feet didn’t hurt, and I snatched it, taking it with me. I knew it would make me feel better if I got scared. I couldn’t be scared. Mama needed me.
The door creaked open, and I slowly walked inside, thankful for the shiny cold floor beneath my sore toes. My feet fell flat as my eyes adjusted to the bright lights that lined the white hallway. It smelled funny, like it had been cleaned over and over again. I stayed still, trying to listen for Mama, and that was when I heard a scream.
Mama!
I surged forward, leaving dirty footprints behind me as I dragged my blanket down the hall. I ran as fast as I could, pretending that Tobias was chasing me. “Mommy!” I shouted. My face felt really wet. “Uncle Richard!”
“Baby!” I heard Mama’s raspy scream, and I came to a sudden halt. My heart was thumping so fast, and I was scared. I was scared, and my blankie wasn’t making me feel any better. I turned and stopped right inside a door that was half-cracked. At first, I only saw Uncle Richard. His brow was raised, but the rest of his face remained smooth. “Baby!” My face was suddenly turned as Mama grabbed onto my upper arms. “I love you. Tell Tobias I love him too.”
My eyes welled up, and my lip shook. “Mommy?” My head was suddenly crushed into her warm chest, and my arms came up around her waist as she cried. “Mommy, it’s okay,” I mumbled, giving her my best hug. “Why are you sad?”
Her breath tickled my ear after she kissed the top of my head. “Find your daddy, Gemma. He will save you if I don’t come back. His name is—” Suddenly, my mother was ripped from my arms, and I jolted forward in panic.
“Mommy!” I screamed. “Mommy! Wait!” Two men came forward wearing black outfits and pulled her backward. She fought them. Her brown hair swished in front of her face, getting stuck on her cheeks.
“No! Let me go! You cannot do this, Richard!” She looked to the men holding her arms. “He’s raped me! Over and over again! He’s going to take my kids! I’m not sick! I don’t need to be here!”
Uncle Richard’s arms circled around my waist as he pulled me away. My arms reached out, dropping my blanket in the process. “Mommy! Come back!”
“No!” Her hands were freed now, and I was glad when she hit one of the men in the face. But then his eyes grew smaller. They looked like little lines below his eyebrows. He was angry. “Let me fucking go! Baby, I love you! Find your daddy!”
I didn’t know who my daddy was. I didn’t know! Before I could say that, Richard threw me into the hallway, and I hit the hard floor with a big thump. My belly dropped, and my back hurt. I cried out even louder, feeling for the bump that I knew would be there. The door was slammed, and I looked up quickly through blurry eyes.
“Where’s Mommy going?” I asked through choppy breaths. Tears fell, and they made me feel cold.
Uncle Richard came and stood above me as I sat on the floor. I wanted Mama. She needed me. But Uncle Richard was looking down at me with the same look he’d always given her before yelling. He bent down in front of me as I cried and cried. I couldn’t stop. I wanted Tobias. And I wanted my blankie. I stared at the door behind Uncle Richard, remembering that my blankie fell. But it was okay. Mama could use it. Maybe it would make her feel safe.
“You remember this, okay, little one?” Uncle Richard’s finger trailed down the side of my face, and I cried harder. “This is what happens when you don’t follow the rules. You were supposed to stay in the car. Maybe I’ll have to punish you too.”
Fear like no other came at me. I ducked my head into my knees and tried to hide. I couldn’t run to the closet. I couldn’t look for Tobias and hold his hand. Mama wasn’t here either. I didn’t feel safe with Uncle Richard.
“Judge Stallard?” I heard a deep voice say from somewhere close by, but I kept my face hidden. I didn’t want to be here.
Uncle Richard left my side. I could feel him walk away and hear his feet on the hard floor. I shivered as I grew even colder.
“Ahh, yes. Sorry to keep you waiting, Mr. Underwood. It seems the little one left the car when she should have stayed put. I have to keep my eye on this one. She’s like a curious little kitten.”
A deep laugh sounded, and I finally raised my head a little, just to see who it was. Maybe he could get Mama for me. The man eyed me for a second before turning back to look at Uncle Richard. “It’s no problem. I just wanted to shake the hand of the man I am now doing business with.”
Richard shook the man’s hand as I hiccupped. I wanted Tobias.
“It’s a pleasure. I’m glad I have someone I can count on. I’m assuming the shipment went smoothly? I haven’t spoken to my men yet.”
“Shipment is nice and tidy on the lower deck. Serial numbers have been scratched. Untraceable.”
I put my face back down as Uncle Richard spun on his shiny shoes. “That’s great. That’s exactly what we needed.” I heard his footsteps again but didn’t dare look up. Tears kept falling, and I was shaking. I wanted it to stop. “When it’s time for another batch, I will let you know. We’ve been getting requests more and more lately. But I have your contact information, Mr. Underwood. I’ll call when it’s time. I’m going to get the little one home.”
The man cleared his throat, and I was pretty sure he was looking at me. I didn’t want to look at him, though. “She’s a cutie. Even with tears.”
Richard laughed. “Crying makes them cuter, don’t ya think?”