Chapter 31
Phin
Mid-afternoon, I went to line up to get into the shelter for the night, and all I could think about was Lizzie and not seeing her today at the coffee shop. I tried to stay away from the café, but I couldn’t do it. Knowing her love for caffeine, I was very concerned about her because she hadn’t been in for almost two weeks. I wouldn't rest until I knew she was okay.
I was like a junkie needing a fix. I abandoned the line and got the bus to get to Lizzie's house before she got off work. I was happy she lived in a nice neighborhood so I wouldn't have to worry about her walking around at night. I skulked around the block and found an empty house across from hers that was up for sale. I could sit hidden in the front yard behind the bushes. This space would be an excellent refuge; the other neighbors couldn't see me, and I wouldn't be visible to her when she left her house. Her car was out front, so she should have been home, however, her apartment was dark.
After hours sitting vigil, the sound of a barking dog in the neighborhood had woken me. There still weren't any lights on in her place, but it looked like maybe the TV was on. Lying here cold and lonely in the darkness, all I could do was wonder what she was doing in there and if she was as sad as I was at that moment.
I pulled out my sleeping bag and wrapped myself up with it. When I woke up again, a dim light was on, and it must have been the wee hours of the morning. Finally, I saw the light switch off and saw a shadow crossing the front window. Thinking about Lizzie in the bed we shared brought an asteroid-sized lump to my throat. No way was that her at this time of night. It must have been my imagination.
I curled up, rested my head on my backpack, and fell asleep again. When the sunlight warmed my face it woke me up, and I was hoping she'd go to the café today, but she didn't leave the house and the curtains were drawn. How could she not go to work, it had been almost two weeks? What about getting food? There'd been no deliveries or any people coming or going from her place. I couldn't stay here all day; I didn't want to be discovered and kicked out of my new hiding place. This was a perfect refuge if I needed it. It looked like it would rain and as much as I wanted to keep vigil over her, I couldn't stay, I needed to find some shelter for tonight. My body ached as I stood and stretched, trying to get the feeling back into my cold limbs. Reluctantly, I left around lunchtime and got some food at the neighborhood taqueria so I could still keep an eye out for her. After the burrito, I headed to a local public library near her house to send her an email, then I would head off to try to get a room at the shelter.
Lizzie
After I got off the phone with Duke, I felt a sense of relief. He was reluctant at first to tell me too much about Phin's history, but I spent the first ten minutes of the call bawling my eyes out. I think my crying made him uncomfortable, so he quickly conceded to my request. His deep voice should have been intimidating, but his chuckle relieved my sadness as we discussed our plan to find Phin. Duke had come up with several places for me to check out over the weekend and a few people to call to see if they'd seen him. I wanted to look for Phin immediately but had told Duke about the storm arriving later today, so of course, he threatened to tan my backside if I ventured out. After only speaking to him a short time, I knew he wouldn't hesitate to fulfill that promise. The mid-afternoon sky was darker than normal due to the impending storm while I sat and devised a plan to find him. Later that evening, I had to turn up the TV to try to drown out the sound of thunder and driving rain that had me worried about Phin. As I sat and stared at the television show I’d seen a million times, I hoped that he'd find shelter somewhere and keep dry during this torrential downpour.
Later that evening, my stomach let out a growl, and I wasn't sure when I'd last eaten anything other than toast. I was out of bread, so I decided to order another pizza that I probably wouldn't eat, but better to have it in the house. Before I picked up the phone to order it the doorbell rang, and there stood a soaking wet delivery guy with a pizza. I was scratching my unwashed head, not caring that the pizza guy was seeing me in my state of break-up meltdown. The delivery guy had seen me unwashed and heartbroken all week.
"I didn't order this."
He checked the receipt. "This is the right place, and it was prepaid with cash. Lady, it’s Friday night and raining cats and dogs. You might as well take it. You look like you could use some food, and probably a shower." I didn't bother to disagree; I took the pizza and closed the door. He wasn't getting a tip. I looked at my face in the entryway mirror and confirmed that I was a hot mess. I had dark circles under my eyes, and my greasy hair was close to being one giant dreadlock. Who sent me a pizza? Could it have been Hope, or maybe it was Phin?
I shuffled over to the well-worn couch and my stomach growled at the first whiff of the pizza before I could open the box. My head and my heart hoped that the pizza was from Phin, but I couldn't wait to find out. We had a plan to find Phin, and for the first time since he left, I had an appetite.