Homeless Heart

"Love you, I am on my way."

As I began to text back, I noticed my mother had returned with a concerned look on her face as she dealt with the staff.

"Mother, can I introduce you to Duke Keagan."

She looked distracted, then gave Duke a genuine smile. Sticking out her elegant hand. "Hello, Duke, nice to finally meet you."

I smiled as I watched Duke's large paw of a hand go out to meet my mother's.

"Good to meet ya, Mrs. Dunbar."

I noticed she touched her necklace, a sign she was nervous.

"Call me Olivia."

I noticed something else was wrong with my mother other than this awkward moment with Duke. "Mother, what's the matter?"

She continued to play with her necklace, trying to compose herself. "Your father is having a rough morning. I am worried he won't be able to make it downstairs for the ceremony." She paused for a second, finally looking me in the eye.

"Will you go up and talk to him? I think it will help with his mood."

"Sure, Mother, I'll go check on him. If he can't make it down, it's fine. I don't want to stress him out. Lizzie's on her way, and she doesn't want me skulking around when she arrives. I'll go talk to Father, and then I’ll stay in the study until the ceremony." I’d been hesitant to walk around most parts of the house because of the bad memories it held. My mother had assured me she'd redecorated my father's study and it was used more as a reading room now.

"You sure you want to go speak to your old man? I don't want your day to get ruined."

"No, I'm good; thanks for worrying about me."

"Where in this house can I go watch some sports until you need me?"

I showed Duke to the study, he entered, but I stood at the doorway, taking it all in. The study had been transformed into a different room. I scanned thoroughly, looking for triggers of what had happened here in my past. There was no longer the dark mahogany wood-paneling or wall-to-wall bookshelves, the leather sofa and club chairs had also gone. Thankfully, the one thing I didn't want to be there had been removed, making me relieved not to see my father’s desk. It was now decorated in warm beige tones with lush and comfortable furniture, making it a cozy sanctuary that I wished had been here when I was a child. There was also a huge television on the wall. My father would never have had a television in this space. A tear came to my eye as I watched Duke sitting on the large sofa flicking through the channels.

Heading down the hall to my father's room was a little more daunting than I was prepared for on my wedding day. I could hear some of the machines continually beeping, and his breathing, from down the hall. When I got to the doorway, I surveyed the room, which was darker than my last visit. My father lay in his large hospital bed, and I did my best to evaluate him. He looked peaceful, but he was so skinny that his skin was almost translucent, and the dark circles embedded under his closed eyes were more predominant than my last visit. The sound of the breathing machine caught my attention as it sounded labored. His nurse sat in the corner in a comfortable chair, and she smiled as she stood and walked over to me.

The nurse spoke in a low, hushed tone, "He's having a bit of trouble breathing and is in more pain today. I was hoping he'd be in better shape this morning. We've agreed for him to sleep for the next few hours and we'll see how he's feeling closer to the time of the ceremony."

I patted her arm. "Please keep me posted. I’ll sit with him for a few minutes."

She nodded and left the room to give us some privacy. I sat in my mother's chair next to his bed and held his hand, and he didn't flinch. I watched him attempt to open his heavy eyelids. I think he was fighting his meds, so I didn't want to disturb him.

He smiled as he struggled to speak. "Morning, Phin. Any butterflies?"

"No way, I want it to be over, so we are married. I can't wait for us to be legally together so everyone will know she's mine forever."

My father squeezed my hand. "I am happy for you. Phin, promise me to have the ceremony if I can't make it down today. I'll sit at the window and watch. Don't delay for me. I want you to have your big day."

I looked at my father, he was close to tears, which almost made me get emotional too.

"Father, don't worry. You'll make it downstairs. Sleep now and rest up so you can. We want you there, and we'll give you all our strength for you to be there. Now rest, Father."

"One last thing, your mother has the paperwork. Your trust is all ready for you. She'll take care of the final details." The trust had slipped my mind; the only thing I was obsessed with was making Lizzie my wife.

"Don't worry about it today, Father." I patted his cold, frail hand. He closed his eyes and held my hand until he nodded off to sleep. I kissed his cold forehead for the first time in my life and left him to rest. There were so many things I wanted to know about his background, but today wasn't the day. I hoped we'd have some time to get to know each other.

When I got to the door, he said, "I love you, Phin."

I turned around and smiled at him, unable to find the three words he was looking for in return.

"Me too." One day I hoped I could say them back. He gave me a weak smile, and I walked down the stairs, watching my mother telling people what to do like she was born to do. A shiver shot through my body as I realized my mother and Lizzie shared more in common than I'd ever imagined.