Never in a million years did I think coming to St. Mary’s would end up in me wrecking the headmaster’s car, in the middle of the night, with someone like Isaiah beside me. Never in a million years did I think I’d be so…careless. Not to mention the fact that I was so blindly ignoring the consequences that could follow. But even with all of that, I could feel the amusement bubbling on the inside. It was totally the wrong time to be smiling or laughing, but my cheeks ached to do it.
“Relax.” Isaiah was still chuckling with a smile on his face so large it could compel me to do anything if I looked too long. “It’s only rule-breaking if we get caught, which we won’t.”
Then, he opened the door and climbed out effortlessly, taking my panic with him. Sloane had said that the Rebels were dangerous, and Isaiah was just that. He was so incredibly dangerous because he muddled my brain anytime we were alone. Rational thoughts evaporated, fear slowly dissolved, and dread no longer existed. The only thing that did exist was him and my wildly chaotic heart that seemed to soar higher than ever when he was beside me.
As soon as I climbed out of the headmaster’s car, feeling the mist of cool rain dampening my hair, Isaiah’s hand clasped mine, and we jogged through the wooded area until we got back to the school.
“You are insane, Isaiah,” I whispered as he pulled me closer to his body, continuing our conversation. “It’s still rule-breaking, even if you don’t get caught.”
“Says who?” he asked, glancing behind us at the tall trees. “And don’t tell me you didn’t enjoy breaking the rules.”
I didn’t answer him as he pulled me the rest of the way through St. Mary’s door. He was right. I did enjoy it. I enjoyed it too much.
“You think I enjoyed being chased and then wrecking a car in the process?”
“I sure do,” he whispered along my ear, making me jump a little. The farther we walked into St. Mary’s, the louder the silence became. Our wet shoes squeaked as we walked along the shiny floors, but that didn’t deter Isaiah from keeping silent. His hand still stayed in mine as he leaned in even closer to me, making me freeze. “Just like I think you enjoy it when I whisper in your ear.”
He wasn’t wrong. I did. My body flamed and ached in such a tortuous way that I was left speechless. It was so incredibly messy inside my head. Feelings and hormones were rioting so much that I stopped right there in the middle of the hallway.
I tipped my head up to his, both of us standing there with nothing but the flicker of sconces along the wall as our witnesses. Isaiah stared down at me, a devilish grin gracing his undaunting facial expression. Things were shifting. I could feel it.
“We shouldn’t have kissed like we did earlier.”
His sentence threw me off, and I felt my emotions slipping. His eyes didn’t change, though. The swirls of blue still held a wealth of wickedness in them.
“Why?” I turned toward him even further.
His chest brushed against mine as he took a step closer, erasing any empty space that was hanging in limbo. His hand gripped my chin hard enough to gain my full attention but not hard enough to hurt. “Because now that I’ve had a taste of the good girl, all I want to do is corrupt her.”
My stomach bottomed out, and my next words surprised me. “Then what are you waiting for?”
Isaiah’s face darkened, his dark brows a cloak over his eyes, and then…and then I was spinning.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Isaiah
I won’t corrupt the good girl. I won’t corrupt the good girl. I won’t corrupt the good girl.
No matter how many times I said it, it wasn’t getting through. My lips were on hers, and everything else was long gone. Her mouth was sweet and inviting and surprisingly needy. A growl tore up my throat as I pulled her small frame into my chest, and when she shuddered against my hard abdomen, I almost ripped her clothes to shreds.
Need like I’d never felt before drove through my body, mangling every part of me to distortion. I didn’t care if she was fragile like my uncle had said. I didn’t care if she was inexperienced or that she and I could never be anything more than what we were now. I didn’t care that I was feeling something much stronger than desire whip through my blood.
Her kiss sucked me in. She sucked me in. A connection. We had something brewing. Something so big that it made everything else just...stop. Her tongue dragged over mine, and I pulled back to catch myself before I began inching underneath her shirt, as if we weren’t in the middle of the fucking hallway, and that was when a thundering wave of awareness dragged over my shoulder. Wait. Faint footsteps pulled my attention, and I gripped her. We couldn’t get caught. Not now. Not after realizing just how hungry I was for her. And possessive. And protective. And fuck, what was I saying?
“Let’s go,” I whispered, hurriedly pulling us through the nearby door. The second we were inside, I shut it quietly and spun around to check our surroundings. The dining hall was closed as it was the middle of the night, so the expansive area was quiet. The gleam of silvery moonlight shone through the arched windows, allowing me to see just enough to know that we were alone. I turned back to see Gemma nibbling on her lip, looking half scared and half excited. My mouth twisted a fraction, but it quickly disappeared as I saw a light shine underneath the door. Shit. Thinking fast, I snatched Gemma’s hand, and a sweet puff of air left her mouth as I rushed us three tables down. My back was on the floor within a flash, and I pulled Gemma on top of me in a less-than-graceful way. She toppled and let out a little squeal, and before I knew what I was doing, I was silencing it with my mouth.
As my lips moved over hers, I was somehow able to pull myself from the impulsive behavior and began wiggling us both underneath the long bench and dining table. It was the same damn one I sat in all week, stealing glances at her as she sat with Sloane and Mercedes, looking damn near perfect while eating her oatmeal in the morning.
Gemma dragged her mouth from mine, and I placed my finger over her lips. “What the hell, Isaiah,” she hissed over my fingers, her warm breath falling on my face. I inhaled and had to turn my head to stop myself from plunging my tongue down her throat again. “How did one kiss from you end up with me being under a table?”
“Because you’re just as hungry as I am. You feel exactly what I feel when we touch.” My tone was hushed, but the validity to my sentence was in full force. Her body tensed on mine but quickly eased as I removed my fingers from her lips and pressed a quick kiss to the tip of her nose. “I like kissing you, and you like it too. There is no shame in that.”
My heart strained, and I cursed the fact that her kiss was like a fucking truth serum. There was shame in that. I knew deep down that my words were truthful, but I also knew that we were destined to end in tragedy. It felt wrong to be feeding her my emotions, even if they were true, because she and I would never have something rea
l. Even if she were a different girl who wasn’t planning on dipping out of St. Mary’s with a new identity and handful of money, I wouldn’t go down this path with someone.
I needed to push back on the feelings that were there. I needed to stop kissing her, and touching her, and looking for her the second she stepped into the room. I needed to get off probation so I could stop using her as my way off the SMC’s radar.