Thankfully, I don’t have to before he whispers, “Avery Rose, will you be my girlfriend? Leave the Javery zone behind and be mine?”
As I cup his jaw, there is only one word I can say to him.
I feel it, deep in my soul, and I know that it is true.
“Yes.”
Ugh. Why?
How is it already four in the morning?
Fuck me.
My head is pounding.
I feel like I’m going to blow chunks, and I have to go serve coffee.
But I’d much rather stay here with her.
Damn it.
Nuzzling closer to Avery, I take in a deep inhale, the smell of her shampoo making me smile as my arms come around her waist, bringing her closer. Tucking her hands up underneath my chin, she murmurs something unintelligible and I just feel…complete. Whole, even. This girl, man…she really has me in all kinds of ways. I’m completely taken by her, and after last night, I know I should be ecstatic and feel on top of the world.
But I can’t.
Not fully.
Mostly because I’m unsure about it all. I want to believe she was ready, that she wants this. But deep in my gut, I’m worried. Did she did just say that because of what happened when we were getting down? And what was that about? I don’t understand her issues with the lights being on, but it would be great if she could let me in on that. I mean, I know I need to respect her wishes, and I will—that’s not the problem. I just wish I knew why.
I feel like everything is up in the air because of it, and it’s fucking with me.
Add in the fact I’m hungover and got no sleep last night, and I’m pretty sure today is going to suck.
Which is bad because it’s the practice before our game and Coach won’t go easy on us. Tomorrow’s skate will be laid-back, but today, he’ll be drilling us. I kind of regret taking this job at the coffee shop. Maybe I should just chill and let my dad do everything. I mean, it could be so easy. Don’t I, as a nineteen-year-old, get that right? I’m still a kid, aren’t I? Shit, but I know that isn’t right. If I want to be a man like my brothers, I have to follow in their footsteps. They worked for what they wanted. Well, Jude really didn’t have to, but he is now. Shit, that reminds me. I gotta call Jude and Jayden.
Well, fuck me.
As I kiss Avery’s head, she snuggles against my lips and I smile. “Baby, I gotta go.”
“Why?” she whispers, her eyes still closed.
“Gotta work and practice. But stay here, sleep until you need to leave.”
“Okay, thanks,” she says before puckering her lips. She’s so damn cute, and man, I hope she really means what she said last night. That she does want me as her boyfriend. That leaving Javery in the dust is something she is dying for too.
That maybe she loves me.
Shit, why did I think that!
I don’t even love her…
Ugh.
Unaware of my internal battle, she leans toward me and presses her lips to mine. Kissing her is really what I’m starting to believe is my purpose in life. It’s just so natural, like our lips were made to press together and be one. Even sleepy kisses are my favorite. Hell, anything she does is my favorite.
Moving my nose along hers, I say, “Text me when you wake up.”
“’kay,” she says. I drink her in for another moment as my heart prays she isn’t going to break me. Because, if she wakes up and realizes she made a mistake last night, I just might lose it. I’m ready for this, and I need her to be too. It’s time. Yeah, it’s only been two weeks, but it’s been intense and we have basically been in a committed relationship. She just doesn’t want to label it. Annoying as hell, but hopefully that has changed. We may have been drunk, but I remember everything that happened last night and I hope she does too.