I need to know.
Swallowing hard, he clears his throat. “Avery, I swear to God, I didn’t send these texts.”
I don’t believe him. “Yeah, sure.”
“No, really. When I broke it off, it was because I didn’t want a girlfriend. I didn’t do it to hurt you. I loved you as a friend. I didn’t want to lead you on when I wasn’t into it. I told you that.”
“You did, but then you started singing a different tune and drove me to the point of slitting my wrists.”
“It wasn’t me,” he begs. “I promise you. You have to believe me.”
“That’s hard to do,” I admit and he sounds panicky.
“Really, Avery, that wasn’t me. I wouldn’t do that to you. I cared for you. Come on, surely you believe that.”
I thought he had cared, but it just went to shit so quickly. “I think I know who it was, though,” he murmurs.
Confused, I ask, “Who?”
“Matty.”
“What? Why would he do that?” I ask, even though… Why wouldn’t he?
“What did you find out today, Avery? Because I’m pretty sure you know why,” he suggests and I pause, my blood going cold in my veins.
Gasping for breath, it all comes clear to me. He hated Caleb and me together. Used to talk shit all the time and he was so mean. To me, not Caleb. But still, it was insane. He acted as if he was with Caleb, and I stole him from him… Jesus, it all makes sense. “He was in love with you.”
“Yeah,” he says and my eyes fall shut.
You stole something from me that I can’t ever get back, and I’ll never forgive you for that!
“Holy crap.”
“Yeah, I never knew, I never suspected. I mean, we were friends, best friends, and then I started dating you and he just got nasty. When I broke it off with you, he confronted me, admitted that he was in love with me and knew that I loved him. But I don’t play for that team. And when I told him that, he lost his shit, promising me that if I told anyone, he could get your dad to ruin my career. I guess my heart wasn’t really into hockey because I didn’t care. Then I quit ’cause I got into drugs real bad, and I didn’t think any more of it, you know? But fuck, Avery. I’m sorry you got caught in the cross fire and shit. I never knew.”
“Wow,” I say, sucking in a deep breath. “But that doesn’t explain how he used your phone. If you guys stopped talking after we broke up, and the texts came from you for weeks afterward…”
He lets out a long breath and then pauses. “I bet you he did it on my iMessage because he had all my passwords. Really, Avery, I wouldn’t hurt you like that. I did care about you. But when all that shit went down, I just wrote your whole family off.”
I close my eyes and I hear the serenity in his voice. “But why? Why would he do that?”
“’Cause he was jealous of you, always has been. He asked if I still loved you after we broke up, and I said I’d always love you. He’s fucking crazy, Av. I promise you.”
“And he says I’m the crazy one,” I say with a humorless laugh. Shaking my head, I sigh deeply. I’m unsure if Caleb is telling the truth, but it all just makes sense. I didn’t think Caleb could be so mean. He was a good dude. I knew him my whole life, and I always thought what happened was like a light switch flicking off. While I don’t want to believe that someone who was supposed to love me could do this, the evidence is in the way Matty looked at me not an hour ago.
“Avery, I’m really sorry. And I wish you the best, I do. But I gotta go.”
 
; “Of course, sorry. I was thinking,” I say quickly.
“It’s fine,” he says softly. “I hope you are doing well. I think of you often, and I stalk you a bit. You look like you’re doing great. I’m happy for you.”
A grin pulls at my lips. “Thank you.”
“And that Sinclair, man, he’s one lucky dude.”
I smile. “I’m pretty lucky myself.”