I Never Let You Go (I Never 3)

“What the fuck,” she says at a more reasonable volume while reaching down to rub her shin. “What the hell was that for?”

I stare at her intently.

“Hey, I’m just glad it wasn’t me this time.” Kyler laughs, holding up his hands innocently,

We spend the rest of the dinner laughing and joking. I am so excited to be adding not only one but two more additions to our family.

Thoughts of becoming an official aunt consume me the entire drive home from the restaurant, and as I walk to my front door.

I stop abruptly, the smile fading from my face as I see a dark shadow sitting on the front step, leaning against the railing post. Their head is down, leaning on their arms, but the closer I get, the more I can tell they’re a man from their size. I tense up, and my breathing is heavy.

I quietly reach for the pepper spray in my purse along with my phone to call the police when the figure sways side to side and groans. The light catches the side of his face when he moves.

“Finn?”

He doesn’t respond, so I step closer to him. He’s not some intruder ready to rob me, so I put the pepper spray back in my bag. What is he doing here?

I cautiously approach him. His head is back in his hands, and his phone is on the step beside him. I lower myself to his level.

“Finn? What are you doing here?”

“Huh?” He finally lifts his head, and I am almost knocked over by the stench of alcohol. I scrunch my nose in disgust but still stay close to him. His eyes are glassy and swollen as if he’s been crying. I’m not sure what’s going on, but I need to find out.

I reach out and softly brush my fingers against his cheek, taking a seat next to him. “Finn, it’s Lauren. Are you okay?”

He mumbles something before putting his head back on his arms.

“Shit,” I mutter, standing and looking around. I don’t see Finn’s truck anywhere. How did he get here? What am I supposed to do? He is piss-ass drunk and on my doorstep.

I could search his phone to find someone’s number, maybe his sister, but I have no idea what his passcode could be. I can’t just search him without permission. I guess I could call my brother to help, but I don’t want to interrupt their big night.

I am pulled from my internal argument when all of a sudden, Finn sways side to side and falls forward, puking directly on my rosebush.

“Shit!” I mumble loudly, racing forward to help him and running my hand in circles on his back. Okay, he can’t go anywhere. I need to get him inside. He can just sleep it off on the couch. This is the right thing to do, but every part of my mind is screaming, “This is a bad idea.”

I crouch down again and gently place my hand on his arm. “Finn, I’m going to try to get you to stand, but I need you to help me, okay?”

He grunts, and I’m going to assume that he was trying to say “okay.”

“Oh, fuck.” I use all my strength to lift him. When I finally get him to stand, I extend his arm around my shoulders and put one of my arms around his waist.

“Come on, Reynolds, I’m going to take you inside and let you sleep it off.”

I manage to walk us to the front door and get my key out. Finn is so close that the smell of alcohol is almost nauseating. He grips my hips, and I jump when I feel his hard body pressed against my back, dropping my keys. He inhales my hair. “You smell nice.” I look up at him to see that his eyes are squinting, and I can’t help but wonder what happened to him.

I eventually get the front door open, and while walking to the couch, he stumbles, missing a step and taking us both down to the sofa. Lying on his chest, I close my eyes for just a moment. Transported back to a time when this was home, I relish the feeling of being back in his arms.

“I need to go back. I need to make this right. I love her so much,” Finn mumbles before his head drops to the side. I want to ask who he was talking to. Was he talking to me or about me? Does he have someone back in Seattle? I have a million questions I want to ask, but his breathing evens out, and slight snores indicate he has finally passed out. I quickly and gently climb out of his arms.

I reach for the blanket that lies over the couch and cover him. “Good night Finn,” I whisper before kissing his forehead softly. He doesn’t stir, so I stand there for a moment, watching him sleep, wondering how different our lives would have been if I had only said yes.

I groan at the heavy pounding in my head as I wake up from dreaming of having Lauren in my arms. The dream had felt so real that I thought her scent even enveloped me. I wipe the drool currently dripping out of my mouth. The pieces of last night are slowly coming together.

I remember it was my father’s birthday.

I remember the bar.

I remember blowing my mother and sister off.