After getting situated and buckling up, we are finally on our way to Ryan’s mom’s house. She’s hosting Christmas this year, and Amelia is there with Shelli. I was surprised when Amelia said they were talking. I was pretty sure she was gonna kill her cousin, but apparently, I don’t know a thing about cousins. Because they’re back to being best friends.
What I do know is that I am completely and utterly in love with Ryan. These last few weeks have been great. We’ve been busy, but without school, we actually have a lot more time for each other. When I’m in the gym, he sits in the corner and watches videos or sends emails. I work on my reading for my lit class that’s coming up this winter while he is on the ice. Somehow, we found a routine, and I love that about us. Things just work, and I couldn’t ask for anything else.
I’ll admit, I was a little freaked out when his trip with the Assassins was extended by four days. He was originally only supposed to go for five—three games and fly home after the last game—but they wanted him to finish the trip with them. He’s that fucking good, and I am just bursting with pride. The best part, though, was that we made it work. We talked constantly, we texted, we FaceTimed, and it wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. We just adapted, and that’s what has really got me thinking.
“DJ was really impressed with me. He had me on the bench the last two games, Sof. On the bench, as an intern! I got to hand out smelling salts, and when one of the players took a puck to the spot under his arm, cracking a rib, by the way, I got to go out there and help him back to the bench. It was like I was a real trainer. It was fucking awesome.”
Oh, I want to cry, I’m so proud of him.
“Ryan, that’s amazing. I watched the last two games, no clue what was going on, and holy crap, they are so much slower than your games.”
He laughs. “That’s ’cause they’re older and wiser and make plays. We just skate around trying to kill each other and score between the killings.”
I giggle along with him. “It was way easier to follow, even though I don’t understand icing, and for once, Google failed me.”
He scoffs. “Babe, come on. It’s easy. It’s when the player on the defense clears the puck because he’s under pressure.”
“Yeah, but why do both teams’ players run toward the puck?”
“Because if the team that clears it gets there before the other one does, they can call off the icing.”
“Well, that’s just too much,” I announce, waving my hand. “Hockey is hard.”
“But so fucking fun.”
“It is,” I agree, leaning into him. “Was it fun skating with the guys?”
“Yeah, but I didn’t get to play. I just warmed up with them for shits and giggles. You don’t get to do that as a real trainer.”
“Still, I bet it was cool,” I gush, and he nods, a grin pulling at his lips.
“It was great.”
I love the smile on his face and the way his eyes are just blazing today. I reach out, taking his hand and squeezing it. “I missed you so much.”
“I missed you,” he says and quickly leans over, pressing his lips to my jaw in a smacking kiss. “Way more.”
He looks back out at the road as I hold his hand in my lap. I turn in my seat, crossing my legs as I gaze up at him. “So, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Hit me.” So I do, and he shoots me a dry look. “Jerk.”
I smile innocently at him. “So this trip wasn’t so bad, was it?”
“How so?” he asks, puckering his brows.
“For us. I think we did great.”
“No way. It was terrible. I was lost without you,” he says dramatically, and I grin up at him.
I lace our fingers together. “No, really.”
He doesn’t look at me as he shrugs. “Yeah, it wasn’t too bad. I missed you, but we talked constantly.”
“Exactly,” I say excitedly. “So here’s what I’m thinking—”
“Should I brace myself?” he teases, waggling his brows at me. “Shit, is this something off Google?”
“Hush!” I protest, but I can’t help but laugh when he flashes me that grin that warms me all over. “But, really, I know we haven’t talked about it because we don’t want to think of this ending. But maybe, if we are still together come the end of the year, we should try to stay together when you’re gone.”
His grin falls from his face. “Gone?”
“Yeah, whatever hockey team you go to, I want to stay together.”
Ryan glances at me but only for a beat before looking back at the road. “Oh.”
“I mean, it will be harder I’m sure, but I think we can do it—” Before I can even finish, he’s shaking his head.
“Sofia, I’m not doing that to you.”
“But—”
“No, you are here, you are building something fucking great, and I’m not gonna keep you to myself when you deserve so much more.”
“Well, shit, do I get a say in that?” I demand, and he glances back at me.
“I’m saying this for you. It wouldn’t be fair—”
“I feel that’s something we should both agree on. Do you want to be with me?”
“Yes, Sofia, but—”
“But no. I want to be with you.”