“Yeah,” he admits slowly.
“Seriously?” I ask, dumbfounded by this information. “I would never have guessed that.”
“I know. How pathetic. But I know how I am,” he starts, the seriousness in his eyes not allowing me to look away or even think. “I knew if I got into bed with someone, I would obsess if I was good enough and if they liked having sex with me. It gave me such anxiety that I never tried. Plus, Owen takes up so much space and attention that no one ever came to me. With you, I didn’t let my mind stop me. Not only did I truly want you, but Owen was giving me shit for being a virgin, and then my younger brother is, or was, sleeping with someone, and I felt inadequate. But then you kissed me, and I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to stop.”
He's rambling, and it’s adorable. Though I feel as if I’m not fully understanding what he is saying. It’s as if I’m on a roller coaster of emotions and trying to fight the ultimate feeling of falling flat on my face. I search his eyes, trying to figure out what he is telling me, but I can’t make sense of it.
“I know we like each other, I can feel it, but I need to know this isn’t just a hookup.”
Oh. Okay. Now it’s all making sense. I blink a few times and then clear my throat. “While it’s hard for me to fathom that someone like you, Evan Adler, chose me to have sex with for the first time, it doesn’t change my intentions or even how I feel. This isn’t, or wasn’t, a hookup, Evan, not in the slightest.”
“You could be with someone so much—”
“No, I couldn’t. Because they wouldn’t be you,” I say, holding his gaze. “I know what I want, Evan, and it starts and ends with you.”
He leans his head into mine. “I enjoy the way you make me feel. Like I’m not half a man.”
“Because you’re not,” I remind him, moving my nose to press to his. “Believe me. I wouldn’t tell you that if I didn’t believe it.”
“For so long, everyone did. Told me what they thought I needed.”
“I’m not them. I’m me, and the only person who knows what you need is you. So, tell us. Be honest. Be you, Evan. Because I happen to think you’re pretty damn awesome. Just the way you are.”
His eyes burn into mine. “It’s funny you say that.”
“Why?”
“That’s my mom and dad’s song.”
I grin. “I’ve never heard it.”
“Really?”
“Really! I don’t think so. Sing it.”
And he does. Softly, beautifully, and I’m breathless. He sings just the chorus, but it sends chills down my spine, making me grin from ear to ear.
“I lied. I knew the song. I just wanted to hear you sing it.”
He laughs, bringing me close as I giggle. His eyes move along my face, that sweet smile on his lips. “You’re beautiful, Callie, inside and out.”
I move in closer, stroking his nose with mine. Our lips brush ever so slightly against each other, and my breath catches.
He blows out a breath, cupping my jaw. “I don’t want to talk anymore.”
Something flickers in his eyes, and instantly, my body catches on fire. “I knew there was a reason you brought the blankets.”
He grins shyly, his eyes so bright. “Yup. To keep you warm once I get you completely and beautifully naked.”
“Joke’s on you. I don’t need them. I only need you.”
His eyes go half lidded, and when his lips capture mine, everything fades away, and all I want, feel, and need is Evan Adler.