SUNNY
“You’re taking it,Sunny! God answered your prayers with panache, and you can’t say no to God. Abuelita would turn over in her grave.” Summer lays on the guilt, then calls on the wrath of God and our dearly departed grandma all in one sentence.
“Absolutely not.” I storm through the front door of her apartment and wave my arms like an umpire calling a time-out. “You’re not listening to me. I won’t take advantage of him. Baron means something to me.” I hold my fist to my chest and pout. “He’s special.”
“You’re not taking advantage if he pleads with you to live with him, and I saw those eyes, Sunny. I took a good look at his expression. That man was begging to take care of you. He’s only pretending his intentions are honorable to lure you into his sex trap and under normal circumstances, I’d say run. But this is Baron Caulfield. You’ve been crazy about this guy since you were eight years old. If you don’t take him up on his offer, I will. And you can stay here with Gloria.” She taps her foot and points to Gloria’s bedroom door.
“Back off, tramp.” I crinkle my nose and sneer, ready to fight for my man before my mind spins back to her words. “Oh, my God, do you really think he’s planning a sex trap for me?” I hold my hand over my mouth, partly shocked and part nervous I’ll never find the right outfit to wear when that day comes.
Summer’s head bounces with assurance. “Oh yeah, the best kind, too. You’re not afraid of him---are you?”
I jump back and balk at the suggestion. “Never! Baron’s always been a sweetheart to me. And I know a lot of these actor types are sleazy and unpredictable, but my brother, Seth, swears he isn’t like that.”
“Then why are you being so difficult? You said you need a roommate, and he volunteered as tribute. Holy shit, can you imagine the look on Gloria’s face when she finds out you’re living in a seven-bedroom brownstone in the fucking Village? I don’t even need to tell her with whom. That fact alone will make her choke on her own vomit.” She climbs onto the couch with a smug look of self-satisfaction and curls one leg under her behind.
I’m not usually the type of person who is thrilled with the prospect of payback, but that image alone makes the drafty living room feel toasty. Gloria McKinney has made the worst three weeks of my life unbearable by making me feel like I’ve set up a homeless camp in her living room. I know I’m intruding, but I pay a third of everything and search for an alternate place every day.
We decided I wouldn’t stay longer than two months, but less than five days in, and she started treating me like a squatter. As much as I’d love to tell her I’m leaving, I’ve got my reservations about sharing a place with a man I’ve loved so long.
“Stop mumbling to yourself and tell me why I can’t blow Gloria’s mind?” Summer claps her hands to bring me out of my daze, and I snap my head in her direction. I close my eyes and think of Baron’s lips, deep voice, and sweet words offering me shelter---a whole floor at my disposal and a hot flush paints my face pink. I cover my cheeks with my hands and breathe deep, fighting to slow the beat of my racing heart before it bursts through my sweater.
“You don’t understand. If I live there, if he sees me every day, every night, he’ll figure out I’m in love with him. And if he figures out I’m in love with him, he’ll have to let me down easy. And if he lets me down, then that’s it. No more dreams of being with Baron. No more fantasies of sex traps. No more nothing. And I want to hold on to something---even if it’s really nothing.” I fall onto the couch beside her, rest my head on her shoulder, and sigh. “Get it?”
Summer never goes with the flow. “No, I don’t get it. I’d love for you to stay with me, but you’re miserable, and I can’t stop Gloria from being the jerk she was born to be. There’s no way in hell I’ll allow you to room with a complete stranger, and we have so few options available from people we know. In a city of eight million, we really need more friends.” She hops off the couch and leaps towards my purse, rummaging through my bag until she finds my phone.
“I’m not calling him,” I say adamantly, turning my head away from her sassy dance meant to mock my pain.
“If you don’t call him, I’ll text him a few kissy-face emojis with a yes in all caps,” she threatens, waving my phone set to his contact screen.
My eyes bulge out of my skull and my body flies off the couch. “I’ll kill you, Summer. Don’t you dare make me look like a needy chick. He didn’t mean it anyway. It’s just something he said so he’d look like a hero, but he doesn’t really want a twenty-year-old girl skulking around his bachelor pad ruining his solitude.”
“Te amo, prima. And I hope you know I’m doing this for your own good.” She holds the phone over her head and taps the screen. My heart stops pumping blood to my brain. I lunge forward, walking on air then trampling her thighs as I yank the phone and somersault over her arms. It’s a message to Baron—-a message to Baron Caulfield from me, Sunny Luna. Oh, my God. Oh, my Jesus. It went through.
Me: Yes, I’ll do it!
Sent. Delivered. Read.
Baron read my message. Baron thinks I said yes. How will I ever talk my way out of this?
“Summer!” I scramble off the floor and wrestle with her long legs, pinching and slapping with little effect. “How could you!”
“Cut it out! Your hands are chapped. It wouldn’t kill you to use some lotion.” She steps out of my pathetic chokehold and helps me off the floor. “I’m sorry I took matters into my own hands, but you’ll thank me later. And who knows, maybe your babies will thank me. Someone needs to make me an aunt. I doubt I’ll ever have any kids of my own.”
“You’ve ruined everything,” I whimper on the verge of tears, clutching my broken heart with one hand and waving my treacherous phone with the other. “I’m going to disable this thing before I go crazy waiting for him to reply. Because we both know he’s not going to answer. It was nothing but an empty gesture.” I swing it over my head and aim it towards the couch. As it flies through the air, Summer dives like a running back and catches it at the exact moment it pings.
“Aha! I ruined nothing.” She rolls to her side and huddles to keep his reply from view. I panic and jump on her back, pulling her hair and regressing to the maturity of a toddler.
“I’m thrilled you changed your mind. I’ll show you the house tonight and move your stuff in the morning. We'll celebrate over dinner tomorrow night. See you in a few hours.” Summer pauses and waits for me to respond, but I’m too dumbstruck to speak. Baron Caulfield and I are roommates. We’re roomies. This morning I considered moving into a rat-infested studio apartment that reeked of death, and tomorrow I move into a brownstone with the man of my dreams.
No, this can’t be happening. Did I die? Am I dreaming?
“Pinch me, please. I must be dreaming.” Summer obliges harder than necessary. “Ouch! Goddamn it, Summer. You always go too far.”
“You said to pinch you, and I do as I’m told.” She shrugs and hands me my phone. “You can’t say no now. You’ll break his heart.”
“But what about my heart?” I cross my legs, tuck my ankles under my thighs, and then crouch forward to bury my head in the closest throw pillow.
“No, I have a good feeling about him, and you know I never have a good feeling about anyone, Sunny. He’ll take care of your heart. I know he will. And if he doesn’t, I’ll just have to kill him.”