"It's not always a bad thing to have someone who wants to watch out for you," Sophie murmurs.
I blink at her. She's as fierce as Caroline is and doesn't let many people see beneath the surface. I guess love has softened her up a little bit, made her feel comfortable letting down her walls. Trick is good for her. He doesn't let her get away with hiding behind those walls the way she always has. We've been friends for a long time and I've never seen her as happy as she is with him.
Seeing everyone I know so blissfully happy makes me ache for my own happily-ever-after.
My mind drifts to the man I saw from across the room last night at Sophie's rehearsal dinner, Asher Reynolds. No one has ever looked at me and made my entire body tingle like he did. We're paired up for the ceremony tomorrow. He's Trick's foster brother and he is so freaking beautiful, like a Viking warrior.
He's intense and imposing, with dark blond hair that's short on the sides and longer on the top. Beautiful, bold ink adorns his golden skin like living pieces of a story I'm dying to understand. They're a roadmap to his past, which seems as stark and lonely as it does triumphant. Silver jewelry shines from at least three different places on his face—his eyebrow, his nose, and his tongue.
He's well over six feet tall, and so broad through the shoulders that I could probably fit between them two or three times. His entire body is hard, as if he's cut from marble, only there's nothing cold about him.
He looked at me with those steely gray eyes last night and set me on fire.
He's powerfully made and fiercely beautiful, equal parts devil and angel…and I don't stand a chance with him. Lions rarely notice lambs unless they're starving. When you look like him, you can have anyone you want. I'm completely plain and boring. Everything about me says good girl, while everything about him screams sex.
I'm guessing a man like him lives for adventure. He probably dates supermodels and sirens, not boring college students with ink-stained fingers and lofty dreams of being the next big name in romance. I doubt he'll even remember me tomorrow when we officially meet…which is going to be super awkward for me because I haven't stopped thinking about him since I rushed out last night, mortified to have been caught staring at him.
"It's true," Sophie says with a shrug, drawing me back into the here and now. "Letting someone help you isn't bad, Kenz. It's a good thing that you have someone in your corner who wants to protect you from people who would take advantage of you. You aren't weak or helpless, but you're tiny and innocent. There are bad people in the world. They'll take one look at you and think you're an easy target."
"Being short is so annoying. Everyone thinks I'm a little kid," I complain. It wouldn't be the first time someone thought I was an easy mark because of my size. Caroline and our older brothers have been looking out for me my entire life because of it. Even though Caroline is the same height as me, people don't treat her like a kid. She doesn't let them. Maybe that's the difference. I've become too comfortable letting others speak up for me instead of using my own voice. I've let people think I'm less than I am because their opinions never really mattered to me enough to want to change them.
But I want to prove to Professor King—Jared, I have to get used to calling him Jared—that I can take care of myself. Maybe I need to prove it to everyone else too, force the world to finally see me as the woman I am instead of the kid they want me to be. Maybe I need to prove it to myself too…that I can make it on my own.
"Asher didn't seem to think you were a kid," Sophie says.
My stomach flips as soon as she says his name.
"He was asking about you."
"Wait. What? Seriously?" I gape at Sophie.
"Yep." Her lips curve into a knowing smile. "He was pissed that you left."
"Oh." I deflate like a balloon. He was probably just mad that I left and he had to walk alone instead of practicing the procession with me. Even though he's the best man and Sienna is the maid of honor, Sophie paired me and him up together so Dane and Sienna can walk together. It's not conventional, but Sophie and Trick aren't very conventional to begin with. "I'm sorry I had to leave early."
"I'm not even worried about it," Sophie says, smiling at me. "I'm just happy you were able to come at all! Getting married wouldn't be the same without you."
"You know I wouldn't miss it," I say, reaching out to hug her. "You're my oldest friend."
"We've come a long way since summer camp, huh?" she says and then laughs. "Actually, we haven't really changed at all since then. We're both still more likely to hide out in the bunks than participate in group sports."
I smile at the memory. Even though Sophie is a few years older than me, she spent her summers hiding out with me in the bunks instead of with the girls her age. Kids can be cruel, and summer camp is no exception. They picked on her for being awkward and me for being smaller than everyone else. But we didn't care. We had each other. And we've been friends ever since.
"Soph!" her dad says and then taps on the door. "Your man says if you don't answer your phone, he's coming over here."
"Don't you dare, Elliot Aaron Tricine!" Sophie shouts, hopping up from the bed like she can physically prevent him from driving over here. Let's be honest though, he gives her what she wants because he adores her, but there's no way she could stop him if he really wanted to see her. The man is a giant.
She flings the door open to her dad, who laughs and holds out his phone to her. She huffs and takes it from him, fired up and ready to lay down the law. Until she hears Trick's voice. As soon as his deep voice rumbles down the line, she melts like a popsicle and purrs like a kitten.
I don't know where my soulmate is, but I hope he sees me as clearly as Trick sees Sophie. I want their kind of effortless, powerful love. My mind flashes back to Asher and the way he looked at me last night, not like I was quiet little Kennedy Thorne, but like I had his full attention.
For a brief moment, I felt like Icarus before he flew too close to the sun, as if the whole world stretched out before me, mine for the taking. I felt like he saw me.
"Yeah, right," I mumble to myself, shaking my head. No one ever sees me.