Devon smiled and looked to the list for her name. “Got you right here, Mrs. McGraw. Is this your first time?”
“Sure is. I’m visiting my boy Grady and figured this was a good time to get to know his baby mama.” A soft squeak sounded from my mouth and Claire gasped before she turned to me. “I assumed this whole town knew the way those women were talking. Sorry honey.”
Devon grinned. “I already knew,” he assured Claire. “Right this way.”
I followed behind Devon and Claire on wobbly legs feeling as if I was having an out of body experience. I’d gone out of my way, most of my life, to make sure I was never the target of this type of gossip and now it was all for nothing. Now my name was on the lips of every man and woman in town under the age of ninety-nine.
“Your waitress will be with you shortly.”
“Thank you, young man. You’re not the music man, are you?”
Devon grinned. “No ma’am but I have been his assistant for years and now I help run this place. He and Pippa are doing a photo shoot with Ryanna.”
“Sounds glamorous,” she sighed wistfully.
“Enjoy your meal,” Devon said politely and turned on his heels to greet the next set of customers.
“All right Margot, perhaps you’ve been avoiding me and my son?”
I nodded. “I have a bit of an aversion to being the center of gossip, some might say it’s a pathological aversion.” Which again was putting it mildly. “I know it’s not Grady’s fault but avoiding him means avoiding more gossip.”
Claire nodded. “Okay but do you think that’s fair to him?”
“No,” I answered quickly. “I know it’s not but sometimes I just go into self-protection mode.” I sighed heavily, reluctant to get into my own messed up childhood but knowing it was the only way to explain. “I grew up with older parents, much older than my friends’ parents and they were never satisfied with anything I did. If I got an A, it should have been an A-plus so I worked harder and harder, and nothing worked.”
“So you do the hoity-toity thing to keep people from getting too close?”
My shoulders sagged in relief. “In a nutshell, yes.”
“I get that, believe me girly I understand that. But the thing is when you make the choice to have kids, to share those children with another person you have to find a way to change that. For the sake of the babies because they will see how you act and they will do as Mommy does.”
I let out a long breath at Claire’s words and nodded. I hadn’t thought of it like that. “I will endeavor to do better.”
Claire laughed. “See, you’re feeling defensive and you get all high and mighty. Just ask yourself before you respond, does this person mean me harm. I only want the best for you, my boy and those babies. That’s it.”
The waitress came and took our order, giving me a necessary break from the emotional conversation. “I believe you but Grady is your son so you want what’s best for him.”
“And believe it or not Margot, I think that’s you.”
I blinked in disbelief. “I don’t, no I can’t believe that. I’m too old for him and this pregnancy wasn’t planned. We weren’t even in a relationship and now we’re tethered together for life.”
“Doesn’t matter how you get there as long as you do,” she said easily and sipped her whiskey lemonade. “Grady is a good man and with the right woman he’s gonna be a great man. But a woman like you probably expects flowers and chocolate and jewelry to know a man cares and that’s just Grady, not before the money and not after. His love language is service Margot. He does for you because he cares for you.”
I shook my head. “He does for me because I’m carrying his babies.”
“And running that bath was just for the babies? The sex after you found out you were pregnant? The meals? Meeting me?” Claire shook her head in displeasure. “He cares about you and it’s as clear as day. If you would open your eyes without the lenses of your past, you would see that.”
“I’ve been looking at everything through those lenses Claire, I don’t know how to see them any other way.”
“Straightforward,” she said as if it were just that simple. “That blouse makes your boobies look fantastic. That’s honest and straightforward.”
I laughed. “Thanks?”
“You’re welcome. Has Grady lied to you? Given you a reason he might say something just to spare your feelings? Because I’m his Mama and he rarely does it for me and almost never for Beth. It’s not his style.”
I felt like she was trying to tell me something but it was getting muddled or maybe I was just incapable of understanding. “No, as far as I can tell he has been nothing but honest with me, even when I didn’t want him to be.”