Just One Look (Castleton Hearts)

“Now I’m going to have to invite people over,” I said.

“Sounds like my nightmare,” Theo said.

“I’m looking forward to it. People have been so kind to me while I didn’t have a kitchen that I want to repay them. It’s the least I can do.”

Theo looked at me as if I’d spoken in another language.

“That’s what friends do,” I reminded her. “And you had me over, so what was that?”

“I don’t like other people in my house,” Theo said. “Except family. And you, apparently.”

“I’m honored to be included,” I said, and she snorted. “Someday I’m going to get you to host a group and enjoy it.”

“Good fucking luck with that,” Theo said.

“I’m going to remind you of this conversation,” I said.

Theo didn’t answer, but I knew I had pestered her enough for one day.

“Okay, I’m going to go lay in my beautiful bed and read for the rest of the day,” I said.

“Some of us have to work for a living, you know,” Theo said, but her words were teasing. “We can’t all have rich grandmothers.”

“And we can’t all have furniture-making uncles that give us their businesses,” I teased back. “Want me to bring you coffee tomorrow?”

“No, because then I’ll feel indebted to you.”

I shook my head. “Friends don’t work that way. I’ll bring you coffee and then sometimes you bring me coffee or invite me over for dinner again.”

“Coffee and dinner aren’t the same,” Theo said.

“No, but I’ve brought you coffee more than you’ve made me dinner,” I said.

Theo made a groaning noise. “How does this work? Is there a points system I can follow?”

“No, I’m just messing with you. I’ll bring you coffee and the next time you can bring me something,” I said. “We’ll just trade back and forth.”

“This sounds like a lot of work,” Theo said.

“But aren’t I worth it?” I asked, my heart aching a little bit.

Theo looked at me for so long I wasn’t sure she’d heard what I said, but her gaze was intense.

“I suppose so,” she finally said.

I left Theo and Scout and headed home to curl up with a book and then to make dinner. I also packed some snacks and a notebook for the following day when I was going to shadow Sarah at her bookstore. I tried to come up with a list of questions ahead of time to be sure I asked her. Financing, finding a space, ordering, inventory, all that stuff I didn’t have experience with. Sarah had an MBA, so that stuff was probably easy for her, but I was going to have to figure it out on my own, but other people had run businesses without college degrees for hundreds of years, so there was no reason I couldn’t give it a go.

What did give me pause was a little voice in the back of my mind that said I was going to try, and I was going to fail, and then everyone was going to know I was a failing failure who had failed. That was just one of the many pitfalls of living in a small town. Everyone knew about your successes and failures.

It felt like such a massive risk, but the more I sat with this idea of opening a bookstore, the more it seemed like the risk of not giving it a shot was the thing that would haunt me.

First step was shadowing Sarah and figuring out how to do this.

I was almost too nervous to eat breakfast the next morning, but I nibbled on some toast and peanut butter and tossed back a cup of coffee before grabbing my bag and getting into my car.

Sarah seemed pleased to see me, and I told her again that I really appreciated what she was doing.

“Of course. It’ll be fun to have a buddy today,” she said as we went around the shop and made sure everything was set to let in customers. As she did everything, she narrated and I took notes. Since no one was around, I took the chance to ask my most pressing questions about finances. Sarah didn’t sugarcoat and gave me more information than I thought she would.

Once the doors open, the time flew by. I manned the register, which gave Sarah and the two other employees a break. I met Holly and Melissa, the employees and they were just as great as Sarah. Holly was in college part time and Melissa worked part time and had two sweet kids.

Halfway through the day, and I was more determined than ever that this was what I wanted for my life. Not only did I want to have a store and share my love of reading, I also wanted to have a nice place to work for someone.

“You’re really good at this,” Sarah told me that afternoon. “I really hope you do go for it.”