He stared at her for a good, long while, and if she didn’t know better, she’d think she’d hurt his feelings. But he couldn’t be hurt. That would mean their time together meant something special to him and that would leave her thinking he wanted more. Thoughts she couldn’t afford to have. Besides, if he was hurt, if he wanted more, he’d tell her and not let her end things.
“I have to respect your wishes,” he finally said, letting her hand slip out of his.
She felt the loss, an icy grip taking hold of her heart. “I appreciate that.”
He studied her, a frown on his face. “Just so you know… it’s not out of my system,” he muttered. “You’re not out of my system.”
He wasn’t out of hers, either, but it was better to pretend that he was. No way would she admit to him that her biggest fear had been getting attached to him—and she had. And of falling hard for him—and she’d done that, too.
* * *
The next morning, the car ride home passed in uncomfortable silence. Austin knew he should behave better but he was pissed. Pissed their weekend had blown up in his face and pissed that he understood why and couldn’t change it.
He could promise her exclusivity while they were together but he couldn’t offer her a future, and if she couldn’t handle that, then she was right. Ending things now was the right thing to do. And he’d fucking have to get over it so he could treat her like his daughter’s nanny and not the woman he’d had in his bed. The one he wanted to keep there. But no matter how deeply he cared for her, and he had no doubt that he did, he couldn’t bring himself to think beyond a casual affair.
He had a bad history with his ex. Hell, he had a shitty present, and he needed to work on making that issue go away for good. And then he had to focus on raising his daughter. Marriage, family, more kids… were not in his future. And that’s what Mia wanted. It’s what she deserved after growing up without those ties and being alone for the better part of her life. He couldn’t give her that. He was finished with serious commitment other than his child.
It would help if he could bring Bailey home sooner as a buffer between them… and wasn’t that a crappy way to think. Bailey was staying at her grandparents’ until both threats—her mother and Mia’s former employer—were neutralized.
Despite the long trip home, he decided to drop off the bags and head straight to his parents’ to see Bailey. Mia agreed with the idea and they made the hour-long trip. True to his mother’s prediction, Bailey was already feeling better and bounced around them the entire time they were there, chatting and making them laugh with her crazy stories and antics.
Then it was time to return home and the uncomfortableness between Mia and Austin returned and continued over the next few days.
Mia holed up in her room and Austin spent time in his home office. He busied himself with paperwork for Dan and Alpha Security, conference calls, and scheduling and generally kept busy.
Not that he ever stopped thinking about Mia and the look on her face when she’d ended things, telling him she was reminded of her place. That had hurt him. He’d never want her to feel like an outsider in his life, but unless he let her in, went public with the relationship, called it serious, that’s what she was.
Fuck.
He ran a hand through his hair, finding it difficult to get back into his work zone. Thankfully, his cell rang, giving him something else to focus on.
He answered, “Rhodes.”
“It’s Dante and I finally have something solid.” He went on to detail information that was going to guarantee Austin custody of Bailey.
It was the first good news of the day and he intended to make use of it. He headed to the kitchen and poured himself a glass of scotch, taking a long sip, the burn feeling as good as the sense of relief filling him at the thought of keeping his child and banishing her unworthy mother from her life for good.
“Hey. Are you okay? Drinking during the day isn’t like you,” Mia said, joining him and leaning a hip against the counter.
His gaze dropped to the dip of her sweater, the swell of her breasts, and he swallowed a groan. His one-track mind when it came to remembering how her sweet pussy felt around his cock wasn’t going to help him treat her like an employee. Hell, she didn’t just work for him, she was a friend. More than that, but right now she was someone he wanted to confide in.
“I got good news, so consider this like a celebration.” He raised his glass.
“Care to share?” she asked. “The information, not the drink,” she said, laughing.
The light, happy sound twisted his stomach in knots.