“No, I’ve decided that I’m going to go sleep with Mathiras.” I beam a smile at Adiron. “In his bed. Like we did back on the mining station.”
Adiron’s eyes go wide. He freezes, and then a slow, silly grin curves his mouth. “You are?”
“I am. Don’t try to stop me.”
He raises his hands in the air. “I would never.” Adiron’s expression is all innocence. “Should I tell him that you’re going in there? He’s still on the bridge. I can warn him for you if you like.”
I shake my head. “Don’t warn him. That’ll just give him time to come up with a plan to kick me out and I don’t plan on listening to it.”
“You’re right,” Adiron says. “You should surprise him. He won’t be able to kick you out then, because…well, just because.” He gives me an encouraging little nod. “This is a great plan, Helen.”
I thought so, too. I pause. “You’re heading to the bridge now? Can you stall him and give me a few minutes to set up the bed?”
“I will absolutely stall him for you.” Adiron looks delighted to be included in my plan. “You go on ahead, I’ll make sure he doesn’t come back for another good ten or fifteen minutes.”
Grinning, I race toward Mathiras’s quarters, my bare feet padding on the cold floors. Unlike when we were on the mining station, I’m in a sleeping tunic, the neck loose and the material soft and flowing to mid-thigh. I actually like to sleep naked but something tells me Mathiras will have a problem with that. I tap the panel to get into his quarters.
“Access denied.”
Hmph. Well, Mathiras showed me a trick for that sort of thing. I press my thumb on the panel, hard enough to squish my thumbprint. The panel chirps an error, and I lean in and breathe across the plate, fogging it, then push again. The error chirps once more, and then I press on the doorjamb itself, where the join meets the wall. It chirps another error, but the door’s lock releases just enough for me to push the door open a crack and slither my way inside. It’s something about how the heated, smeared thumbprint entered in twice—along with pressure on the door—can trigger the emergency unlock.
I remember everything Mathiras shows me.
Happy to be in his quarters, I breathe deep. His scent is all over this room, that of crisp soap and male skin and fresh laundry. His bed is neatly made and it’s almost as narrow as mine. That’s fine. I won’t take up much room. I move over to it and toss my pillow down, add my blankets to his pile, and then slip underneath the sheets.
Even though Mathiras isn’t here, his scent is on the bedding, and it’s enough to make me relax. Reminds me of our time on the mining station. I slept so good with him at my side. I felt protected and safe, and right now, under his blankets, I feel safe again. Even though I wanted to stay up to surprise him, my eyes get heavy and I drift off to sleep.
I’m sure he’ll wake me up when he gets in.
CHAPTER 18
MATHIRAS
How is it that Adiron can find so much to talk about when I told him I need sleep?
I stare at my brother with glazed eyes as he stirs a cup of night tea with his little finger and then licks it. “So then I was thinking, well, this is a great time for me to surprise Jade with some presents, you know? Shower her with gifts when I come back so she’ll forget all about how much she missed me. And it’ll be good for me to focus, too. I didn’t realize how hard it’d be without her here, but every hour has crawled. So I thought, okay, if I keep my focus on Jade, it won’t be so bad. Maybe the time will fly. And then I had a brilliant idea.”
“Mmmhmm.” I rub my face, weary.
“Here I was thinking I’d shop my way across the universe for her, you know? Everywhere we stopped, get her some cute little trinket. Like those szzt glitter-orbs or maybe some fabric from…” He squints, thinking. “What’s that place with that stuff?”
“I have no keffing idea.”
“Right. Anyhow.” Adi shrugs. “But then I thought…we’re not here to shop, right? So I’m going to steal stuff for her everywhere we stop.” He beams at me as if this is a brilliant idea. “So she can experience what I’m experiencing.”
I blink at him. Twice. Normally I’d tell Adi what a keffing dumb idea this is, but I’m tired. Exhausted, really. I’ve been stressed all day long as we’ve set out, worrying that I’ve missed some crucial element that we’d regret later. I’ve checked our stores, our filters, our food and water supplies. I’ve checked our weapons cache. I’ve triple-checked our flight paths. And I’ve kept an eye on navigation and the ship’s vitals the entire time. It’s been quiet. So quiet that sometimes I catch myself wishing something would happen so that the tension inside me would snap and I’d be able to finally relax.