Chapter 5
WatchingKitplaywith his feline companions at Kitty Krave was heaven. My world slowed down and allowed me to appreciate the little things. Like the way he laughed and how his eyes scrunched up to tiny slits when he was extremely happy. When excited, he couldn’t sit still, and he touched his hair a million times as if checking that he still looked good. He always did.
“Sully, you’re not joining us.” Kit pouted from his position, sprawled out on the floor with cats pouncing on him, climbing all over him, and rubbing against him for treats. They must get a lot of visitors, yet they seemed to remember Kit’s scent, which wasn’t farfetched, what with how often he dropped by. All the workers knew us by now. He texted with the assistant manager all the time and received pictures of every new cat the café took in.
“I’m happy watching from over here.” I took a sip of my drink and stroked the snow-white cat that had settled down on my lap. Now this low-maintenance cat I could get behind. He was comfortable where he was and only gave me the occasional side-eye if I stopped scratching behind his ears.
“But there are so many to love.” He hugged a chubby ginger Persian cat to his chest, and I sighed at how happy he was. I’d never felt this strongly about wanting someone to be happy before in my life. Now it consumed all my thoughts. I wanted Kit’s happiness. I wanted to please him so he wouldn’t leave.
I would have given him anything he asked for, and yet he asked for very little. That only made me shower him with beautiful gifts that reminded me of him. The diamond studs in his ears had been last week’s gift, and he went nowhere without the gold necklace with the kitty lock pendant I’d given him on that first night we worked together.
Don’t you ever wish for things to be back to the way they were? When you had fewer distractions and less worry?
Liam’s words floated in my head. Did I? We had far less trouble when Kit wasn’t in the picture, but I couldn’t regret him. Ever. Even if he walked away. Ever since Pinelli had my father killed and I started working for him to repay my father’s debt, I’d been going through the motions. Never had a long-term relationship or ever wanted one. I moved from one woman to the next, always only temporarily satisfied.
Now I had Kit, who I came home to most nights. As soon as I lay beside him in bed, he would seek me out—even when he was asleep. His arms around me reminded me that I was human and not a killing machine.
Warmth spread through me. For so long, I’d kept my emotions in check, only doing what was necessary for a job.
How had I lived that way for so long? Why hadn’t anyone else I’d met and slept with been able to break me out of that trancelike living? It’d taken Kit with his blunt manners, his affectionate way with people, and his gentle yet warrior’s heart to show me what life was all about. To love and be loved in return.
Kit glanced up and smiled, his dimples flashing, and I watched him hungrily. Fuck. He’d lit a fire in my dark world, and now his flame drew me to him while my past kept me from moving forward as much as I wanted. I wanted nothing more than to take Kit away from all my shadows.
After the tumultuous life he’d had, he deserved stability, security, and safety.
Maybe I was selfish for keeping him.
Kit rose to his feet, a cat in the crook of his arm, and came over to me. He kneeled between my thighs. “You shouldn’t look at me like that here.”
“How am I looking at you?”
“You know.” He waggled his brows, then giggled. “My mom used to read these romance books, and I skipped through one once. I feel like that heroine who’s about to be ravished.”
“Do you want to be ravished?”
Kit covered the cat’s ears. “Shh, they’ll hear you.”
My chuckle startled the cat in my lap. He stretched, got up, and gave me a look of disdain. With a swish of his tail, he jumped down.
“Aww, he’s just jealous he doesn’t have your attention anymore.” Kit placed the cat in his arms on my lap. “Here, you can take this one.”
“Actually, I’d rather have you purring on my lap.”
“Just purring?”
My phone vibrated in my pocket. I took it out of my pocket and glanced at the screen.
“I have to take this.” I gave him an apologetic smile, and he got to his feet.
“That’s okay. I’ll chase the cats.”
“Behave.”
My smile dropped as I got up and moved away from the crowd of people who swarmed from room to room as enthusiastic as Kit about hanging out with the cats. I swiped to answer the call.
“Matthews.”
“Mr. Matthews, I’m here,” a nervous voice said. “I don’t see you anywhere.”