The Alpha Wolf's Secret Baby (Wolves of Anchorage 3)
Page 58
“Yes, it's particularly strong.”
“I know it's probably hard to believe, but some of the things I've done, I deliberately planned in advance. But others were not. I think because I was trapped for so long that all I could think about was getting away. And now that's my main response. If something gets hard, or weird, or uncomfortable, I want to run.” What was going on with her? This was the most she’d ever confessed to anyone about what went on inside her head.
“That's what feels safe for you?” he asked. “Just getting away?”
She nodded.
“If I know you're not doing it on purpose, at least not all the time, then that makes it a little easier to handle. But it’s still not safe. Even though we’re shifters, as you saw today, there are still plenty of things that can harm us. As you know, there are vampires out there too. And plenty of other packs and clans.”
“I'm going to do my best. I'll work on it with a therapist.” Going to the therapist, and telling him that she’d go, was a huge concession for her. “What are you going to do about Arabella?” she asked. That was the question that was at the forefront of her mind. She chewed on her lips nervously while he stared at her.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“Are you going to try and get custody?” Getting the words out was tough – each one felt like a rock in her mouth.
“Oh. No. If you give me your word that you’re working on this running thing, then I feel like the two of us can come up with the visitation schedule ourselves.”
“We could do it now,” she said.
He glanced over at her, taking his eyes off the road for just a second. His eyes were kind. “Are you sure? You don't want to just rest?”
“No. I'll feel better if I know what to expect.”
“Okay. Tell me what your ideal schedule looks like,” he said.
“Well, she would still live with me most of the time. And I would get to see her every day.” That was vital to her. She wanted to see her daughter every single day while she was young.
“That seems reasonable,” he said. “I would like to see her every day as well. What if I pick her up from camp on the days that she goes, and on the days she doesn't go, I come get her from 3:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. if I'm not out on a job? How does that sound?”
Her entire body sagged with relief. That was better than she’d expected. “I could do that five days a week. And that way Arabella would still have some evenings with your pack. Or we could switch it up so you could have a full day Saturday or Sunday.”
“I like that. I could see her Monday through Thursday and then Saturdays, during the day,” he said.
“That works for me. Why don’t we try that and see how she does with it?” Violet asked. “And if you're up for it, you could stay and do pack stuff with us. You don't have to take her off every time.”
“Okay, I'll do that then.” He seemed pleased.
"Are you going to take her to meet your pack?” Violet asked.
“I want to. But I’ll wait until you can go with me. Why don't we give it two weeks just to let everything settle back down?”
He really was a very generous person. She felt quite a bit of gratitude at that moment that he was so forgiving. He had every right to hold a grudge.
So many shifters would have held her decisions against her forever. They definitely would not have forgiven her for what she’d done. Hell, she hadn't forgiven herself.
He didn't bring up any possibility of mating again, or even dating. She just assumed that was off the table. She doubted he was going to ever want to date her again. And she was sad about that. Just a little bit.
Was she going to be one of those awful people who didn't want something until they couldn't have it anymore? She absolutely despised the idea of being like that. She liked to think maybe it was just because she'd been so blinded by fear that she couldn't think straight. But now that they'd been through this kidnapping ordeal and Tristan had been so amazing, she'd started to rethink her decision to declare so emphatically that she would never mate with him.
She definitely wasn't going to tell him that. It wasn't fair to him. She was going to lie low and work on sharing custody with him and reestablish her place in her own small pack. She'd been neglecting her pack for the last few weeks.
When they pulled into the driveway her entire pack was out waiting for her. Tears pricked at her eyes.
“Do they know what happened?” she asked. She heard the tremble in her voice.
“Yes. Derek, one of my pack mate brothers came to watch over them. My pack was afraid they would be targeted too, since it seemed likely they knew about the artifact as well.”
Her shoulders hitched. She couldn't stop the tears. He unbuckled his seatbelt as well as hers and pulled her into his arms. They ignored her pack waiting on them while she cried. She glanced back and was thankful to see that Arabella was still fast asleep.