Stir

The longer I look at him the tickling feeling expands and becomes this overwhelming sensation. I need to break eye contact and bring my body back to itself. I need to start breathing again. Oh God. Is it just me or are things swaying back and forth?

Finally as if God himself has answered my prayers and is having mercy on me, the bell rings and the connection is broken. I release the breath I have been holding since the moment he sat next me and I begin packing up my books. I do my best to ignore him and get out of here as quickly as possible, without fainting or falling on my face. He stands and I almost do a Hail Mary when I think he is going to walk out before me, but then once again he stuns me and sends shivers down my spine. His finger guides my chin up and forces me to look at him. His tongue comes out and runs over his lips. A moan falls from my lips and as appalled as I am, I am trapped by his finger on my skin and his gaze locked on me.

Leaning closer to my face, his nose brushes against my cheek and I inhale his woodsy, masculine scent like a moron. His warm breath touches my ear and I lean into it like the harlot I am apparently. “See you soon, Pequeña.” Why does it sound so sexual? What does the name mean? He pulls back from me and I feel the loss as profound as I would have if I had been locked in his arms. Locked in his arms? Oh boy. Imogen, get a grip.

The rest of the day is a blur. I definitely don’t feel like a God fearing young lady right now. I have been zoned out the rest of the day, my mind on nothing but him. He is not so slowly seeping inside of me. Thank God my final class of the day is gym. Something active to keep my mind occupied. In the locker room, I'm changing into my uniform when I overhear the girls on the other side of my locker.

“Did you see the new boy?”

“Yeah girl. He looks like he is seconds out of the county jail, but he also looks delicious.”

“I know. With all the duds in this town, I wouldn’t mind giving him a spin.”

“Get in line. I wonder what his type is?”

I don’t stay around to hear anymore. I should be appalled but it makes me feel weird… like… jealous? When I walk into the gym room, I see everyone is already lined up for whatever and I move to get in line. Before I can, I am stopped by Evan Ross. He is a boy in my Sunday School class and he is also the son of the local doctor. “Hello Imogen.”

“Hi Evan.” I don’t want to be rude so I answer back and try to move around him, but he blocks me once again.

“We should go to the Carnival in Madden before it leaves,” he says, like he thinks something is different than it was the last time he asked me out.

“Evan, you know I am not allowed to date.” How many times do I have to say this?

“I know. Your father…” His words are cut off by a ball hitting him in the back of the head. We both look at the direction the ball came from and I see Alejandro staring right at us. From here I can feel the fire inside of him. His gaze is locked on Evan and it looks like a warning. Evan puffs his chest out, his face pinched and pissed, but he looks like a chihuahua compared to Alex’s pit bull.

Using the opportunity to move, I walk toward the line and look at Alex one more time. He looks ready to kill him. What is wrong with me that I love that?

CHAPTER 5

What the fuck! More than once today I find myself shaking my head trying to clear the confusion. I call it confusion because this visceral, wolffian reaction I am having toward her can only be characterized as me losing my mind. Maybe it is PTSD due to moving? I mean shit, girls throw themselves at me and no matter what I chose to do or not do, I have never felt this instant connection. This feeling of immersion and a consuming reckless need to claim her and take her home with me.

The voice in my head is telling me she is mine. Fuck telling. The voice is screaming, chanting, over and over, repeating…take her… claim her…keep her. See! Confusion.

She is too innocent and pure for me. Her skin is creamy and white untarnished or blemished by anything unholy or dark. You can look at her and see straight to her heart and soul. She is pure as fucking snow.