Fuck me.
I’m breathing harder than I should.
Yeah, I’ve got to get my head screwed back on.
My phone buzzes with a calendar reminder. Meeting in ten minutes now. Thank God.
“Go sit, Eliza. We’re about to get started,” I say.
She nods and scurries inside the room to the first open seat, throwing a sunny smile over her shoulder.
Goddamn, I’m glad this gathering doesn’t require much brainpower.
Thankfully, Troy also disappears for his shower and returns a few minutes after the meeting starts.
It’s a quick gathering just to review the mission and plans for the next few days. I remind everyone we’ll be meeting virtually daily as long as we’re here for a quick check-in.
I’m well aware I can’t expect all work and no play.
This isn’t my first trip to a place rife with wonders competing for company attention. Without the regular check-ins, it’s too easy for them to get lost on the beaches, and then a vital trip costing tens of thousands of dollars becomes a missed opportunity.
I dismiss the meeting and people trickle out, talking amongst themselves loudly.
“Cole, why didn’t you tell me Ace is smoking?” Troy says when it’s just us again.
I hold his gaze, careful not to let my temper boil over, my face set like stoic steel.
“Ace is not her name. That’s probably also not an appropriate comment to the CEO about a woman you work with while we’re on a work trip.”
He does a double take and slowly winces. Before he can even hold up his hands, offering a half-assed apology, I shake my head.
“Look, I know things are more laid back in Bali. I’m not here to bust your balls or play a game of ‘gotcha,’ but my c-team back home expects a certain discipline. If it’s anything I’d frown on with them, then it isn’t fit for me to be a huge fucking hypocrite and gab about her appearance either—no matter how striking she might be.”
For a second, he’s damn near speechless.
Way to be a sanctimonious jagoff, I think to myself. Where was your concern when she had her fingers in your mouth? When she tripped into your arms and you almost fucking kissed her?
But I left the lab then. I refrained from leaving teeth marks on her lips under the banyan tree.
I do the right thing, dammit, even when it’s the very last thing I want.
Troy stares at me, his mouth parted in this awkward half smile. Then he throws his head back and chuckles.
“What?” I clip. I wasn’t expecting that.
“Oh, man, good for you. The single widower has moved on.” He slaps me hard on the shoulder. “It’s healthy, Cole. I’m happy for you. Honest to God.”
Fuck this.
I should’ve known he’d read between the lines and start flinging crap.
“I have no idea what you mean,” I growl.
“Like hell, you don’t,” Troy whispers.
I stare him up and down, wondering how he’s matured so little when he’s married to his job like I am. And how was I ever close friends with this guy?
“If I said the same thing about Lola Goodwind in finance—”
“I’d tell you to get your eyes checked.” Lola’s image comes to mind. She’s not hideous, but she’s a human chameleon. Maybe if she stuck to a single color or at least one color palette and washed her hair regularly, she’d have men up her ass. She also keeps about fifty different inspirational quotes taped around her desk, the surface littered with disposable cups from every coffee she’s drank that week. “And maybe your head, too,” I add glumly.
“See? No harm, no foul. Like I said, the big man’s moving on and I love it,” he ribs me again.
I shove his arm away, taking a step back.
“Enough.” I try to loosen my frown. “Again, I’m not trying to be a hardass, but what if Destiny hears us? She’ll be upset if we’re talking about our female staff like wagyu steaks, and I’m not having it.”
“Bullshit. You know it’s okay if you get on with your life, right? It’s been years. You’re allowed to have a pulse, Cole. I bet your daughter doesn’t expect you to be celibate for the rest of your life.”
My hand balls into a fist at my side. Mainly because he’s right, and it’s annoying as hell.
“Point is, my fuck habits—or lack thereof—aren’t on our agenda.”
He sighs, slow and hissing. “Yeah, okay. Well, we used to be more than just co-workers, remember? We were friends, Cole.”
He waits for me to respond.
When I don’t, he continues. “Why’d you shut me out, man? Really? I did everything you asked after Aster—well, after—”
“After she died. You can say it,” I spit.
He flinches. “Right. After that. I did everything you asked—including taking on this overseas role that keeps me three thousand miles from home. Not that I’m complaining, the lifestyle suits me. But still, why’d you go and freeze me out?”