Shadows (Dark in You 5)

Devon turned back to the window, relaxing slightly as she noted how close they were to her apartment building. She was mega tired and needed to crash badly. She also needed to breathe in air that wasn’t filled with the pooch’s scent.

“You always do that when you’re not the one driving.”

Blinking, she looked at him. “Do what?”

“Rest your hand on the door handle, as if you’ll leap out at any moment.”

Her little fists banging the car window, her breaths sawing at her dry throat—

Pushing back the memories, Devon licked her lips. Honestly, she didn’t like being in cars at all. Had found them confining since that day all those years ago. That was why she’d forced herself to learn to drive—it was about facing her fears. As the driver, she was in control, so it wasn’t so bad. But being a passenger always made her nervous.

For months after that terrible day, she hadn’t spoken a word to anyone. Had been terrified to go to sleep as she’d known the nightmares would take her. Had suffered flashbacks that seemed triggered by the smallest things. Had been unable to even look at a photo of her mother without wanting to scream.

Without Gertie, Russell, and her girls, Devon might never have recovered enough to live a life that wasn’t haunted by that day. The nightmares still came now and then, and she had the occasional flashback during periods of stress, but she was as close to okay as she had the potential to be. She’d even been able to have a relationship with her very fragile mother who, unlike Devon, had never moved past what happened.

“No response to that?”

“Was there a question?” She mentally crossed her fingers, hoping he’d let it go—this really wasn’t something she could stomach talking about right then. Seconds of tense silence ticked by, grating on her raw nerves.

Finally, after what felt like minutes, he sighed. “All right, we’ll drop it. For now. Tell me about you and Finn.”

Devon grimaced. That wasn’t exactly a cheery topic either, but it was better than the first. “Finn’s Prime of his lair and a very strategic businessman who’s built himself an empire over the years. He’s nowhere near as rich as Knox, but he certainly has money to burn.” He also didn’t think much of her line of work. Finn was all about logic, reason, and ballpark figures. To him, tattooing held no value and was a waste of time. He felt she could do better with her life.

“I know that much, kitten. I never asked about him, I asked about you and him. I take it you’re not close, since you refer to Russell Clarke as your dad.”

“No, we’re not close. Finn and my mother had a meaningless, one-night stand … and I was the result. She didn’t tell him about me. She didn’t tell me about him. Kept his name secret from everyone. I was eight when Jolene found out Finn was my father. She contacted him.”

“And then what happened?”

“Not much. I’d been living with Gertie and Russell for years by then. I thought of them as my parents, and I was happy there. Finn didn’t want to force me to go and live with him—in fact, I think it suited him just fine that I didn’t want to. His partner had left him, so he had a family to win back; it would have made it a fuck of a lot harder if I was living with him.”

There was a whole lot of information there, Tanner thought. But there was also a lot of holes. “How did your mom die?” he asked, his tone gentle. Nonetheless, she bristled.

“I thought you wanted to know about my relationship with Finn.”

Tanner felt his mouth tighten. His hellcat sure had a lot of no-go subjects. But after the day she’d had, he’d be a fucking asshole if he pushed her to open what was clearly a raw wound. “Finn has other children, right?”

She nodded. “Three.” Like Finn and his partner, they were harbingers whereas Devon took after her mother, who was a hellcat. It was one of many things that set Devon apart from her paternal family, but she didn’t lament that.

“What’s your relationship with them like?”

“Complicated,” said Devon just as he pulled up outside her building. And he immediately tensed. Yeah, she’d figured he wouldn’t like what he saw. Looking at the tall, rundown, graffiti-stained building, she almost sighed. She wished she could say it looked better on the inside than it did on the outside, but that would be a lie.

“You live here?” Tanner asked, voice strangely flat.

“Yep,” she replied, going for nonchalant. He’d given her rides home in the past—mostly when she’d been smashed after a girls’ night out—but she’d shared a place with her cousin back then. It was only when her cousin got serious with some guy that Devon moved out to give them space.