“Sure we do.” He grins. “It’s MNE or Mine.”
“Mine? Why Mine?” I ask.
He leans in and grins. “Because this is ours. This thing we’re doing is different, but it’s going to be ours. Fuck everyone else.”
I smile for the first time today. “Yeah, fuck ‘em.”
“Anyone ever tell you how sexy you look when you curse?” he asks.
My breath hitches.
The lights suddenly go off in the dance studio.
“Power outage?” I say.
“Good timing,” he replies. Leaning in, he pulls me into his arms. We’re both sweaty, and I know I want him to touch me even as I want to push him away because I don’t understand him.
He stares down at me. “You were a bad idea from the start.”
“And you were bad from the very beginning.” I lift my chin.
He lowers his head.
I go in first.
I kiss him.
His tongue invades my mouth the minute our lips touch. I tell myself it’s the adrenaline from working out too hard or maybe just the darkness, but I know it’s him. I cling to his shirt and pull it over his head.
He doesn’t hesitate at all as he spins me around and presses me against the nearest wall.
Why do bad ideas always feel so good?
I moan when he starts trailing kisses down my neck. If we get caught, we’re completely screwed. But I’m willing to risk everything—including my dreams—for just one more taste of him, one more flick of his tongue. His chest heaves as he deepens the kiss.
The lights flicker back on.
We break apart so fast you’d think our parents just walked in and announced we had to get married.
I wipe my mouth.
He licks his lips.
I want more.
“Sorry,” I say.
“I’m not.” His response is quick, and then he pulls me in for a tight hug. “You did good today. Go home and sleep.”
I want to rest my head against his shoulder so badly that it physically hurts. Tears sting the backs of my eyes because…why? Why does it have to be him of all people? Why did I have to fall for him? Why am I falling?
I don’t realize how much I needed the compliment until a tear falls onto his shirt. He says nothing, just holds me tightly and then tenses more when the door opens.
Shit, it’s over.
Someone found us touching.
Scandal awaits.
Instead, he breathes a sigh of relief and curses.
I look up and see Sookie watching us, the look in his eyes calculating.
“Ready?” he asks in English.
“Almost,” Ryan says and literally turns away from Sookie. He holds me close and then kisses my forehead before releasing me.
I have zero words.
Ryan grabs his bag and leaves me alone in the room.
I crumple to the floor and cry.
I think I know why but, really, it’s because the bully in my nightmares is the same one I want to dream with.
His kisses.
I touch my mouth.
The door opens again.
Jisoo walks in with Haneul, and they both drop their bags.
They frown at me.
“Are you okay?” Haneul asks.
Why is everyone being so nice?
I nod and stand quickly. “Yeah, just a long practice.”
“And we’re just starting. It’s not even six at night, and I want to nap,” he jokes, his smile falling when I don’t return it. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Yeah.” I stand. “Shaky legs, though. Enjoy this one.”
“He’s a masochist when it comes to choreography.” Haneul laughs. “Where is Ryan anyway?”
“Out with Sookie.” I smile. “I think they had plans. And since we’ve been here since six this morning, I’m out.”
“Go relax,” Haneul says.
Jisoo waves at me and then comes over to pull me in for a hug, which is random and weird until she whispers in my ear, “It’s okay to like him.”
I gasp and whisper back while Haneul stretches. “How did you know?”
She laughs—it’s the first real laugh I’ve heard from her. She braces me with both hands. “How didn’t you know? He watches you all the time.”
“No.” I shake my head.
“Yes.” She nods hers. “Just know we’re doing something different here, so if you like him and he likes you, nobody’s going to be weird about it. I know it’s not normal in groups, but…honestly, who cares at this point? This is our last shot. So, if you get love out of it, get it. And if we get to debut, great. Just don’t get caught…”
“Ah, so easy.” I laugh. “Getting caught.”
“Hey, some people survive the scandal.”
“Yeah, and others burn on the internet over and over again,” I say. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”
She nods. “We start group practice in two days. Maybe by then you’ll have it all figured out.”
“Or I’ll still be confused as hell, kissing a guy I hate.” I shrug.
She shakes her head and bursts out laughing.
“What’s so funny?” Haneul asks.
“TikTok.” Jisoo covers for me. “See ya.”
I realize how much I really like her in that moment and leave with a smile on my face instead of tears. Then wonder what the hell Sookie and Ryan are really doing.