So much is at stake, and I feel sick to my stomach.
I may even puke up the pizza I ate.
So much hinges on this.
Not just my career but also Haneul’s and the girls’. We have one shot, one chance. Shit, we’re like the Avengers at this point because I know how brutal things can get if we fail, and it’s not like our label is super behind us, even though our CEO loved the performance. If the fans hate it, the label will cut us.
This is called our one shot.
A chance.
Because they trust Haneul and me, but…
Shit.
My stomach makes a noise, though not because I’m hungry. I’m just freaking the fuck out over all the pressure on us.
“Be right back.” I stand and run to the bathroom. I don’t puke, but I do stand there and think about all the groups that have made it despite the circumstances and in spite of even their labels being against them.
Weirdly enough, I keep going. If Stray Kids made it doing things on their terms, so can we.
But…
Despite their hella hard work, it kind of feels like a lottery.
One we could lose.
“Hey,”Ah-Ri sounds through the bathroom door. “You okay?”
“Totally fine,” I lie. It seems I always lie to her these days. “Just…thinking.”
“Yeah, I totally do that for hours in the bathroom, too.”
I laugh despite the stress. “I’ll be out soon.”
“Should I be worried?”
“Totally. Let’s burn the building.”
“I’ll grab the matches,” she kids.
And I love her for it. I love that she’s making it so I’m not so stressed. So I’m smiling rather than frowning and wondering if the world really will burn.
“Oh yeah?”
“I’m a good partner in crime.”
“And to think I didn’t realize I needed one of those until now,” I say.
The door opens, and I see her poke her head in. Fuck, she’s pretty. And I hate how pretty she is because it’s so damn distracting when I need to focus.
“Good.” She walks in, and the door clicks shut.
It feels like one of those moments.
The ones where you’re like, oh, shit, this might actually be it, and I might never come back from this. But I don’t even care anymore because…
Her.
So, I wait.
I wait for her to approach me.
And she does.
I’m still, completely unable to move but fully aware of her beautiful features, her dark hair, eyes, and the shy smile she tries to hide.
My heart hammers against my chest.
My emotions are all over the place. I try to stay calm.
And then she touches me. Just a soft brush of her fingertips against my mouth as if she’s trying to figure out why we have this connection, why we both have this tension, this feeling.
I wait.
I don’t want to, but I do.
She leans in and brushes a kiss across my mouth. “This is a bad idea, isn’t it?”
“It was a bad idea the second I asked myself what you tasted like,” I say.
She pulls away. “When was that?”
“The first argument we had,” I confess. “The one where you basically told me you would taste bitter then so sweet I would probably die from it. The first time you opened that pretty damn mouth. Then. It was then.”
She presses her lips to mine so hard that I almost stumble backward, and I know I should stop her.
But I don’t.
Because this is what I want.
What I need.
Her.
I grab her sweatshirt and pull it over her head, surprised that she lets me, and then I’m suddenly backed against the counter, pulling her with me, my hands with a mind of their own as clothes start to fall.
My phone rings in my pocket. So does hers. I want to ignore it but know that something’s clearly wrong if it’s not stopping. With a curse, I pull away from Ah-Ri and look down at my screen. She’s already on hers.
“Jisoo texted,” she says. “Something about an emergency meeting.”
Dread fills my body as I answer my phone. “Yeah?”
It’s Haneul.
He’s already called twice.
“Look,” he says, “I just got some more information. SWT is dropping a song early, like literally when we were supposed to release our mini-album. I guess they decided to surprise their fans as a thank you after the whole scandal with Lucas and that one fan who turned out to be setting him up in order to ruin his career. Marketing felt like it was great timing, and the buildup has been so good they went along with it.”
“Of course, they are.” My chest heaves. I know they don’t plan this shit, and I know that it’s more about timing than anything. They aren’t trying to screw us, but it feels like it right now. It really does. We were already low on time. But now? Now, it’s like…a clusterfuck of stress.
Ah-Ri looks at her phone. “Of course, they are. Why are we even trying? Our teaser and MV likely won’t even be enough.”