Love or Lust (LOL): Part 3

No, I didn’t come here to find someone. The fact of the matter is, I did, and I was happy with that until about twelve hours ago.

“Say something, Presley. Anything. Tell me you hate me. You don’t believe me. You want me to leave. I don’t care what you say, just say something so I know you’ve heard me. I need to know I haven’t lost you completely. That there’s still a chance to save this. To save us.”

My resolve slips, and I make eye contact. Tears are forming in his, and I can feel the ones that have already slipped past my barricades.

“You showered.” It’s all I can muster.

“I smelled like her. She was all over me. I know you don’t want to hear that, but it’s true. I couldn’t get rid of the smell, so I showered. The last thing I wanted was for you to smell her on me and get the wrong impression, though I think that happened anyway.”

“What was I supposed to think, Jace? You were with her. I knew you were with her. She was drunk,” I practically shout, using air quotes even though they’re not necessary. “She was all over you yesterday. I knew she was making a move. I knew you lied to her and told her you were available.” Again, the air quotes aren’t necessary, but now I’m fired up and talking with my hands. I’m flailing them around for no other reason than I want to pound my fist through the wall and this is a better option. There are cameras watching. They’re always watching. “No matter when you came back here, I was going to be angry. Not because you smelled like her but because you were with her. The more time passed, and you still weren’t here, the angrier I got.”

“I was only with her for ten or twenty minutes, I swear. You can ask Lennon. I woke him up about an hour after we left the game room.”

The thought crossed my mind, but there’s no telling if he would cover for Jace or not. Or if they already talked and he was part of all this. They could be on the same side, plotting against me.

This is starting to feel a lot like a game of chess. I’m the queen, but I’m trapped in the middle of the board, unable to move. Jace is one king, Lennon the other. I know which way I want to go, but there is only one way to get there and it’s dangerous. All the pawns are out to get me, and there is no way to avoid getting hurt.

In the end, that’s what scares me the most.

Being destroyed at the hands of a man. Again.

It felt like I would never survive the damage Wren caused. I did, but there’s still a chink in my armor. One more heartbreak and I won’t survive.

Jace has the power to destroy me. To crush me completely.

Heart and soul.

“I want to believe you, I do. It’s not about Lennon backing your story or anyone else. Last night, when you weren’t here, I realized that there was a point in time where you wouldn’t be there. To hold me. To sleep next to me. With your arms wrapped around me protectively. It was an eye-opening moment that led to me being pissed off because you could have been here. We both know our time is limited. It could be over any second, and yet you chose not to be here.

“Whether you were with Lennon or Teegan, you still weren’t here. Everything you’ve ever said to me leads me to believe that you want this to continue after this is over. I want that too, and I want to believe you want that, but your actions said otherwise. I can’t risk the heartache I know will follow if you walk away from me, so I need you to answer this one question and we can pretend last night never happened. But please, if you care about me at all, answer me honestly.”

His expression is pained as he nods his head once. Sucking in a deep breath, I ask him the one thing I need to know. The one question that will tell me what’s real and what’s not as long as he answers me honestly.

“Did you mean it when you said you were falling in love with me?”

Jace doesn’t hesitate.

“I did and I am. More and more every day. Every second I spend with you makes me believe in something more, something bigger than I ever imagined possible. A love greater than you find in stupid romance novels. Yes, Presley, I meant what I said, but now... now I am in love with you.”

My heart swells in my chest, and I’m up and moving before I even realize what I’m doing, walking straight into Jace’s waiting arms. Tears are freely streaming down my face when there’s a knock on my door ten minutes later. Neither of us makes a move to answer it, ignoring the visitor until they’ve knocked three more times.

“You’re my date today,” Jace begins as he unwraps his arms from around me. “Why don’t we make a day of it? Cuddle up on the couch and watch movies all day, eat junk food, and ignore the outside world.”

Another knock, this time more urgent.

“After I kill whoever is out there right now,” he grumbles as he steps out of our embrace and heads to answer the door.

Lennon.

Of course.

Because who else would be beating on my door? Not once has Milo or Bella ever come over unannounced. Teegan wouldn’t dare at this point. There was only one person who it could be, so I wasn’t shocked to see Lennon’s smiling face as he breezes into the living room without being invited.

“Did you need something?” Jace growls, leaving the door wide open as he walks back over to me.

“Just wanted to make sure you found your phone. I stopped at Teegan’s, and she didn’t have it.”

“I had it,” I say brewing a fresh mug of coffee, doctoring it up with cream and sugar before offering it to Lennon. He declines so I take a sip, burning my tongue.