VIOLA
“Are you okay?” Lorcan asks me for the hundredth time. We’re in the car driving to the east coast. The address where Dino is supposed to be is forty-miles east of London, a stud farm. Since one of Dino’s mother’s passions is breeding and racing horses, it makes sense. The farm is not in the Vice’s name or in my father’s name for that matter. It’s a Donovan-owned enterprise. Lola was a Donovan before she married Liam Vice, Dino’s father.
“I’m fine,” I say to him. It’s just the two of us in his Mclaren. Jude is following in his Aston Martin. The deal is that I ride there with Lorcan and back with Jude. The boys are still squabbling over me, no matter how much of myself I give them.
“Are you sure you’re okay? You’re scratching the hell out of leather with your nails,” he chides, glancing at me between keeping his eyes on the road.
I glance down. My nails are shorter now but my fingers clutching the leather is still leaving a mark. I relax my hand and place it on my lap, fighting the urge to fiddle with the radio.
“Are you worried about Dante?”
“No.”
“Is it that we’re going to see Dino because It’s okay to be nervous?”
“I’m not nervous.”
“He will want to see you. This is Sinner we’re talking about. He’s worshipped you since the moment he met you.”
“That’s not—” Fuck. I shake my head. “Just turn around.” This is a mistake.
“We’re not turning around. We’re going to get him back. I’m more worried that we’re going to have to fight our way out of this. Sinner wouldn’t have stayed away this long unless they were making him.”
For once, the darkness is quiet and withdrawn. I don’t feel like I’m losing. I feel like I’ve lost and I’m trying to salvage something out of the mess that’s been left. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. Dino promised me he would never leave me, and yet he fucking did.
Because I turned on him.
I didn’t mean to hurt him, but I couldn’t control it. And what if it happens again? The blood at the edge of my vision is back, staining the insides of the car a dark red. With every mile closer to the coast, I feel like screaming.
But I can’t lose it again.
“Viola, the fucking leather.”
“Fuck the leather,” I snap at him.
Lorcan sighs. “Here, take my hand.” He offers his palm, unturned, and I take it. I grip hard, shoving all my pain, and all my grief into that hand. Lorcan says nothing but when I look at him he’s wincing occasionally as he cruises us down the freeway. When we pull off, he takes his hand back to handle the car better around the corners.
“Are you ready?” he says pulling off the main road and into a long driveway lined with horses in fields.
“Yes,” I say, sucking in a breath. “Yes, I fucking am.”
The Donovan farm is huge, with several brick buildings, yards, stable blocks, and outhouses. The main house is newly built with cream-painted walls and huge arching windows. The main courtyard is packed with cars that have spilled out into one of the fields. The only thing that stands out as being ‘Dino’ is the line of racing bikes near the house. I recognize his Ducati in the middle.
Lorcan takes my hand as we walk up to the front door.
“We’re just going to knock?” Jude asks, catching up to us. “Looks like they’re having some sort of party.”
Lorcan gives him a look. “You got a better idea?”
“Fuck, no,” says Jude. He leans over and presses the doorbell. Inside, you can hear a load of dogs going crazy.
After a few minutes, Jude knocks, hammering on the door as loud as he can.
The door swings open.
A woman with light brown hair and dark brown eyes, in a floral dress, opens the door. “More guests. Please come in. Everyone is in the back.”
We pass through the house which is a mix of old brickwork, beams and cream-painted plaster, and new leather and metal furniture dotted around marble units.