“Ezra don’t do this to yourself. Any man would be lucky to have you. He’s a self-righteous asshole who gets his jollies off by hurting other people. He’s a contracted killer, Ezra, and you deserve so much better than him, and he knows this.”
I nod and stare at the spoon in my hand. “That’s what he kept saying. Last night, he said when he pictures his life happy, it’s with me.”
Jordin sighs and licks her spoon clean, “Honestly, it sounds like he’s just as confused as you are and doesn’t know what he wants, or he’s just feeding you what you want to hear in an attempt to keep you there.”
“Yeah, maybe,” I whisper, burying my nose in the lapel of his shirt and inhale his scent. “As much as it hurts to walk away, it’s what best for us both.”
* * *
The next fewdays I had spent in Jordin’s guest room refusing to leave the bed or eat.
“Ezra?” Jordin calls out. I look up at her from the switched-off cell phone I was currently staring at. “You’ve been cooped up in this room for days, babe. Why don’t we go out for some air? We can go shopping or hit the salon and get you a sexy new makeover?” She suggests taking a seat on the bed beside me.
“No, I can’t face going out right now. I just want to be alone.” I sigh, looking down at the cell phone again. I’m tempted to turn it on to see if he’s sent any more messages. Jordin sighs and drops a kiss on her temple.
“All right,” She leaves the room and closes the door behind her. I give in to the temptation after a couple more moments of deliberating and turn the phone on. My heart races as the logo appears and the phone comes to life. I wait anxiously for it to load, biting my fingernail nervously.
15 missed calls
4 voicemails
2 text messages.
I unlock the phone and tap on the message’s icon. I tap on his name and read the messages.
Damien:
Ezra, call me.
Damien:
Ezra, you’re not safe out there by yourself. Tell me where you are?
I push the phone icon and play his voicemail messages.
“Ezra, answer the phone.” My eyes fill with tears the moment I hear his voice. His voice is tight, and he sounds agitated. I click the next one.
He sighs, “Ezra, come on. Please call me back. I need to know you’re okay.” I press the button for the next message.
“Ezra, just come back home, and we can talk or tell me where you are, and I’ll come and get you. Stop being stubborn. You’re going to get yourself killed. Call me.” I can hear him pacing around as he speaks.
I push the button for the final message. “Christ, Ezra, throw me a bone here. Tell me you’re okay, at least? Please, just call me. I’ll be waiting.” He sighs tiredly. I can just picture him running his fingers through his hair as he left me that message. My finger hovers over the call back button. I can at least tell him that I’m safe. He deserves that much. I press the call button and lift the phone to my ear. My heart begins beating briskly in my chest. The phone rings once, and on the second ring, I hear his deep sexy voice on the other end.
“Ezra.” I bite my lip and close my eyes, trying desperately to keep the emotion out of my voice.
“I’m okay,” I whisper and hear him sigh in relief on the other end upon hearing my voice.
“Where are you?”
“I’m safe.”
“Ezra—”
“I have to go.”
“Ezra wait, please don’t hang up. Can we just talk? Tell me where you are, and we can talk.” He asks.
I shake my head and wipe the tears that spill over my cheek. “No, there’s nothing else to say, Damien.”
“Ezra, I can’t protect you if I don’t know where you are. If you don’t want to see me, that’s fine but let me ensure that you’re safe at least.” He replies edgily.
“You don’t need to worry about me anymore. I can take care of myself.” I assure him and hear him exhale heavily.
“Ezra—”
“Goodbye, Damien.” I hang up before he can protest and turn the phone off again. I curl up on the bed and hug the pillow. It hits me all over again how much I miss him. My insides ache terribly with every waking moment I spend without him.
I keep reassuring myself that it is for the best for us both. Damien won’t be risking his life to keep me alive anymore. He can go back to his life before we met and forget all about me.