“I’m so hungry!” He banged his head against the messy granite countertop and came back up with what looked like chocolate sauce in his hair.
Great.
“I know, buddy, I know.” Where was Rip? “I’m just gonna put your sister on the couch to sleep—”
“I wouldn’t,” he warned just as I tried to lay her down, only to have her eyes burst open with tears.
“Hey, it’s OK, it’s—”
A wail from the pit of hell escaped from between her tiny lips as I tried to bounce her up and down and hush her.
Ben continued to bang his head into the chocolate sauce.
A trickle of sweat ran down my back as I took in the complete chaos.
Panic rose in my throat as I held Viera close and walked back into the kitchen. OK. Breakfast it was. Now all I needed was a pan to toss the eggs into, multiple shots of espresso, and prayer beads.
“Buddy, where did your—” Don’t say mama… don’t say mama. I closed my eyes against the tears that had immediately sprung to my eyes just thinking of Monica. “Where are the pans, do you know? Could you maybe—”
With a dramatic sigh Ben hopped off the barstool and slowly made his way over to where I was standing, then pulled open a drawer. “You use the flat one.”
I gritted my teeth. “Thanks.”
“Aunt Colby, do you even know how to make an egg?”
“Of course!” I lied. I rarely cooked. My DoorDash app was constantly running and open. I embraced food delivery apps the way most people embraced religion.
With fervor.
Dedication.
And loyalty.
While my job might have been to visit crazy destinations and eat at five-star restaurants, it also meant I was rarely home to cook, and while I was a great judge of food and locations, a chef I was not.
Viera’s wails turned into soft cries as she rubbed her eyes.
I bent down and grabbed the pan—the flat one that the five-year-old master chef had pointed out—and set it on the stove, then flicked on the gas.
Nothing happened.
Ben sighed again.
Viera turned to watch in interest.
Thank God she’d stopped crying.
“Why is nothing happening?” I mumbled under my breath.
Ben rolled his eyes.
“Hey, no attitude.” I pointed the pan at him, then set it down on the counter and tried the knob again. The flame finally caught, scaring the crap out of me, causing me to jump and Viera to drop her dragon directly onto the burner.
It went up in flames immediately.
“Oh God!” I yelled. “Fire extinguisher! Where’s the fire extinguisher!”
“Nine-one-one! Nine-one-one!” Ben shouted over and over again as he stopped, dropped, and rolled.