Almost.
Years ago, I thought if I could just forget, then maybe the threads of time would forget too, and it would be like it never happened.
Therapists classified me as having severe anxiety, OCD, and PTSD after my parents' deaths.However, nobody knows what I experienced before they died.
I roll onto my side and push the memories out of my head.I can’t think about the past tonight, and not when the present is so unstable.
My present world has been rocked off kilter by the one man who’s managed to baffle me all my life.If there’s one thing that’s consistent about Dominic, it’s that.
I manage to settle and fall asleep, but it feels like I've barely rested when my alarm goes off.
I feel like a zombie when I finally roll into work and the first thing I see is an email from Massimo asking to meet in his office in an hour.
Since he doesn’t usually request impromptu meetings, I know it’s probably going to be something else.He’ll either want to talk to me to see how I’m doing, or it will be to do with something that might be going on.Whichever it is I need to go in with a clear mind.
I sit in my chair and my thoughts go to the little angel in my bag.Taking it out I look at it and once again think about that kiss yesterday.I wish there were some magical way I could heal my heart.There isn’t though. Not when it comes to Dominic D’Agostino, because my heart belongs to him and that’s not a good thing for me.
* * *
“I need you to adjust my diary,” Massimo says, leaning back against his chair.“I have to move all my low priority meetings a month ahead.”
As he looks over at me sitting opposite him, a thin line of worry tenses his jaw and I know he's stressed out.Instantly, I know this meeting is about the trouble that sent Dominic home.
“A month?” I raise my brows and widen my eyes.
“Yeah, looks like I’m going to be spending a lot of time outside the office.And I might need you around for some special meetings.”
“Of course,” I answer.
Special means secret. That is why he keeps my job separate from Jenna, his secretary.While she does the standard things a secretary would normally do,I take care of the other parts of the business that only someone he trusts can do.
“What’s happening, Massimo?” I ask, hoping he'll tell me more than he did nights ago.
He presses his lips together and thinks for a moment.“We don’t have anything concrete yet, but that's what's worrying me.We can't find anything, and I don't want any nasty surprises like the past."
He seems so different now from the guy I grew up with, the guy who saved me.I’ve watched him turn into this leader he is where he tries to take care of everyone.I can see worry has gotten to him now because things are different in his life with the little family he has.
“You’ll figure something out.” I nod with conviction.
“Thanks. I'm trying." He inclines his head to the side and his gaze clings to mine."How are you feeling today?”
I set my shoulders back and sit straighter against the chair.“I’m okay.”
“Dominic might be my brother, but I hope you know you can talk to me.”
“I know,” I answer confidently.
“You loved him, Candace. When he left, I watched you pick yourself up like you always do and start over.I don’t want you to fall apart again and not when I’m here to help.”
“That’s sweet of you.”
He laughs. “You and I both know I am not sweet.”
“You are for me. I think… when it comes to Dominic, the best thing I can do is leave things as they are.” Those words feel wrong, especially after that kiss yesterday.Leaving things as they are is definitely not a reflection of what my heart wants, but my heart has a way of landing me in trouble.
“Is that because of Jacques? You seem to like him.”
God… please don’t strike me dead for allowing my oldest friend to believe a lie.What should I say now?