Chapter 25
Last night, I slept like a log, the most soundly I’ve slept in a really long time. When I finally woke up at noon, I wasn’t overcome with regret as I thought I might be. I was worried that once the romance wore off, once I was off that pier in the middle of the sea and back on dry desert, the magnitude of what I agreed to would hit me and I’d go back to that pier and throw myself off the edge. Instead, I awoke to a pleasant tingle in my gut; a happy-but-nervous tingle, not a regretful gut wrench.
‘What the bloody hell is that on your finger?’ Sabina screeches when I finally wake up, flying out of her seat at the dining table and grabbing my hand so that she can stare at my brand-new engagement ring.
‘Erm, yeah, about last night .?.?.’ I smile, handing over the ring so she can inspect it properly.
‘That is one serious diamond,’ she says, almost giddy with desire. ‘It looks like a D clarity, and I love the princess cut and setting. Platinum band too. And it’s massive. If he got it from here, it probably cost him at least five k. In England, it would have been ten.’
‘Dirhams?’
‘No, pounds you useless idiot! Gosh, this diamond is wasted on you. You don’t get how spectacular it is.’
‘I do, thank you. It’s very pretty and shiny.’
‘See what I mean? But anyway, tell me exactly how this ended up on your finger.’
I launch into everything that went down last night as Dolly rustles about in the kitchen, emerging a few minutes later carrying a tray with toast, tea and a Bengali-style omelette, but I’m too wound up to eat. The kids are splashing about in the pool and I’m glad my niece isn’t within earshot; she doesn’t need to hear the ins and outs of my love life. Sabina listens intently, sipping on her special extra-strong tea from her secret stash of Yorkshire Tea: she leaves the tasteless Lipton out for everyone else.
When I finish recounting it all, she leans back and shakes her head. ‘Bloody hell, that’s a lot to take in.’
It’s not quite the congratulatory reaction I was hoping for, but I know she has her doubts. I also know it’s not going to be the last time someone reacts like that, so I might as well get used to it.
‘Look, I know you’re not convinced,’ I begin, my face turning pink with defensiveness.
‘Hey, you don’t have to convince me.’ She shrugs, examining the ring in one hand and holding her mug of tea in the other. ‘So long as you’re truly happy and this is what you really want, and you’re not doing it because Samia’s engaged or because you’re approaching thirty, or because he has a lot of money and he knows how to wine and dine and woo you, and not because he railroaded you into it by showing up here uninvited, then I’m happy for you.’
That’s a lot of ifs, buts and ors.
‘I appreciate you looking out for me, Sabs, but don’t worry, I’m doing it for the right reasons,’ I say with growing confidence. ‘It’s nothing to do with Samia getting married and I’m not trying to prove a point. Because amidst all the shit I’m going through, have been going through, Hamza has been a rock.’
‘OK, and what about the attraction part of it?’ she asks, raising an eyebrow doubtfully.
‘Things are different now. Now that I’ve really got to know him, the attraction has grown. It’s there, you know?’
Sabina nods. ‘Fair enough. It sounds like you know what you’re talking about. I’m happy for you.’
‘Thanks.’ I take the ring back from her and slip it onto my finger with a small smile. ‘Anyway, what are your plans for today?’
‘I’ve got a bride later, but I’d really like to meet Hamza before you leave tomorrow as it looks like the next time I’ll see you will be at your wedding. Shall we all go for shisha tonight, after I’m done with work?’
Er, no thanks,I think, but do not say. Sabina has no filter, and I have no idea what she may or may not say that will completely ruin the impression Hamza has of me.
‘What?’ she demands when I don’t reply. ‘Don’t you want me to meet him?’
‘I don’t know,’ I respond weakly. ‘I don’t know if I’m ready to introduce him to everyone yet.’
‘Uh, firstly, I’m not everyone. Secondly, Yas and Amina have met him already. Thirdly, you’ve accepted a ring from him, so you should be bloody ready.’
‘And fourthly?’ There’s always a fourthly with Sabs.
‘Fourthly, don’t make the same mistake others make.’
‘Which is?’
‘Muslim girls these days wait until they’re ready to marry their man before introducing him to the people who know her well enough to offer some perspective,’ she explains, wrinkling her nose in distaste. ‘Instead, they do it when it’s too late and they’ve already made up their minds. At this point, no one can persuade them otherwise as they’re too in love to think logically. Don’t be that girl, Zara. Let everyone meet him so you can make a more informed decision about your future.’
I give in weakly. ‘Yeah, OK, sounds good.’ She has a point, I suppose. But still, having everyone and their cousin input on my love life is bloody draining.