An Italian Dream

9

FERN

Fern was the last one to breakfast and joined the girls as they attempted to rid their hangovers with strong Italian coffee. Stella had gone inside to finish getting ready.

Chloe filled her in on their night out with the Italian millionaires. It sounded like a good evening, but witnessing Amber’s sullen expression and washed-out face, Fern couldn’t help but worry about what today would bring. She was rapidly regretting her and Stella’s decision for each of them to spend the day with their girls. It had seemed like a good idea, a chance to bond and try to bridge the gap that had widened between them.

Yesterday had been refreshing to spend the day with Stella and really talk, even if casting their minds back to their youth had brought with it the usual worries and regrets. The way Fern thought about things was as if her life was over. She knew deep down, with the girls having left home, she was at a crossroads. She was only thirty-nine, the big fortieth birthday a few weeks away. Lots of women were only just starting a family at this age. Did it really matter that she’d done things the other way around? Her life was not over. Somehow she needed to believe that. She needed to believe that she could find a renewed passion in everything: a career, herself, her marriage…

Facing up to reality and the barrage of thoughts about her future was painful but helpful. Perhaps the same would come of spending the day with Amber. Stella would have a far easier time with Chloe as they, at least, seemed to like spending time together. She hoped a gentle walk, fresh air and some food would improve Amber’s mood.

Stella breezed across the terrace in a floaty maxi dress and sandals, looking ready for a day out.

‘Have you got everything?’ she asked Chloe.

Chloe nodded, downed the rest of her coffee and picked up her bag.

‘We’ll see you back here later.’ Stella squeezed Fern’s shoulder as she walked past. ‘Ciao,’ she called, before disappearing round the side of the villa with Chloe.

Fern sighed and thanked Violetta as she began to clear away the breakfast things.

‘We could just stay here,’ Amber muttered as Fern stood up.

‘There’ll be plenty of time to lounge about here. It’ll be fun to explore, I promise. Go get your bag.’

Amber stalked off and Violetta met Fern’s eyes. She gave her a knowing smile. ‘My daughter is nearly thirty and still sometimes behaves like a teenager.’

‘Great,’ Fern said with a wry smile. ‘I have a few more years of this then.’

As she retrieved her bag and sun hat from her room, she vowed to make the best of it. Amber couldn’t continue to be angry with her forever. Maybe today was the chance to understand what was actually going on.

* * *

Amber remained silent and sullen as they walked. It was hard to tell if she was just hung-over, but with vibes of annoyance emanating from her, Fern decided not to even attempt mindless chatter. Instead, she relished the peace while enjoying the gentle warmth and the sights. The island was blooming. Bright pink bougainvillea decorated walls, the lemony scent of myrtle filled the air, and the late-spring flowers nestled crimson, plum and white among fronds of green.

Fern liked that the villa was away from the busy centre of the island. The road wound past lush gardens and hidden villas, then suddenly the view would open up, sweeping down to Marina Grande and out to the Bay of Naples. She didn’t mind walking in silence, but they couldn’t not talk to each other all day, so eventually she decided to instigate a conversation.

‘It’ll be nice to see Ruby next week, even for just a couple of days, won’t it?’ Fern hoped that Ruby was a safe subject, but then immediately felt bad for thinking that she’d have preferred Ruby’s company to Amber’s.

‘She’s a nutter for not coming out for the whole two weeks.’

‘She’s doing a nursing degree – it’s not that easy to drop everything.’

‘You mean unlike me.’

Fern silently cursed that she’d already said the wrong thing. ‘I didn’t mean it like that, but yes, there is a difference between doing a vocational course such as nursing and working on actual wards, compared with studying something like marketing. Also, Ruby didn’t take a year out like you did.’

‘To go travelling. It’s not like I bummed about wasting my time.’

Fern shook her head at how defensive Amber was. ‘You’re taking everything I say as if I’m having a go at you. I’m really not.’

Amber huffed and picked up the pace. More whitewashed buildings lined the road now they were close to the piazzetta. Fern bristled inside at the anger Amber seemed to be directing towards her and had done for quite some time. She had no understanding of what she’d done to upset her, but she was determined to find out. She caught up with her daughter.

‘Where are we going?’ Amber muttered. ‘It feels like we’re walking aimlessly.’

‘Isn’t that the joy of being in a place like this, getting to explore and discover hidden gems?’

Amber rubbed her forehead. ‘If I didn’t have a hangover, maybe.’