When We Dance

Something tells me he likes me a lot right now.

“You of all people,” I go on. “You gave me so much shit with your coldness and aloofness, like you were no longer interested in me. Who do you think you are to do that to me after kissing me in front of the hotel that night?”

He bites his lip.

“No lip biting, please.”

It may be that the alcohol speaks a lot in my voice.

“You are so fucking cute, cariño.”

“Maybe I am. If I am, I want to be treated nicely.”

“You want me to kiss your butt?”

I think about it for a second, an amused smile tickling my lips.

“You can do that too. But we need to be in a private place for that.”

His chest rocks with laughter while he keeps his lip rolled beneath his teeth. His eyes explode with light.

“Listen…” he says, moving closer to me and snaking an arm around my waist.

He moves his hand into my hair and pulls me into his chest.

I feel everything I shouldn’t feel. His hard muscles and strong hands. Stiff flesh between his legs.

I surely have a way of getting them hard with my blabbering.

“We all know you’ll end up with Kai.”

I jerk back so hard his arms stiffen around me to keep me in place.

We lock eyes again, neither of us smiling. He tips his chin down.

“What do you want from us?” he asks quietly, and the evening becomes solemn all of a sudden as we slip through these moments of cold, hard honesty.

“You can’t say that to me…” I murmur, my voice quivering.

“Yes, I can, baby.”

“I didn’t even know I’d end up in this stranger’s house with all these people. I’m in your arms right now… How can you know what will happen in the future? I don’t. And Kai doesn’t know that either. He’d be here instead of you if that were true.”

“It doesn’t matter who is here with you. It’s the truth. And Francisco and I know these things. And no matter what he says or what you say, we know how these things go.”

Something hurts inside me. It’s a sharp pain that spreads through my chest. Like a burn.

I push him away. He doesn’t move but softens his lock around me so I can unglue myself from him.

My jaw clenches.

I don’t know why I’m getting all emotional all of a sudden. Something rubs me the wrong way. It’s like I can’t catch up with my feelings, and my feelings can’t catch up with me and what is going on.

I was right.

Things happen so fast I can’t look at them frame by frame. I can’t adjust. Nothing sinks in. It’s like I’m swirling with a storm. Even this pain. What is this pain? Regret? Anger? Denial?

“You ruined it for me,” I say bluntly.