But everything feels good now, so I push my face against his touch, inhaling his masculine scent, the aroma drifting from his hand––a mix of smoke, musk, sandalwood, and something sweet.
The scent floats into my lungs, messing with my brain and making me slip into a trance.
He glances at me a few more times before bringing the car to a stop in front of a park.
It looks like a golf park.
His eyes gleam in the moonlight when he turns to me. Holding my gaze and still cupping my neck, he gives me a soft grin.
This is not about sex, and we both know it.
We also know we will pretend at some point that this was all about sex because that’s life and its harsh, unwritten rules.
And we’re playing a game and all that.
We think it’s safer that way.
But our feelings and lust blend into each other because of the intense attraction between us.
My gaze dips to his lips before steadying on his eyes.
He leans toward me while I shift to him, and we kiss.
Oh… We kiss.
The kiss is a story in itself, and it comes with the smell of the ocean, the silent night, and the solitude surrounding us.
We kiss as if we have nowhere to go, and the night was never supposed to be any different. As if nothing happened. And life hasn’t been as crazy as it was these past few hours with twists, unexpected events, and new people.
We kiss as if the time belongs to us, and we only have a sliver of an opportunity to meet. Two strangers taking it all in, living it all, sharing a dense story threatened by its finality.
We know it’s a losing proposition, and we accept it. Without doubts, questions, or minding the price.
We do it without pulling back.
There may be something poisonous buried in all this. Some secret, dark plan to unravel me.
I’ve always suspected it with all of them.
Kai, Francisco, Alejandro… They play hard. It’s in their blood. They can easily switch their passion off.
Maybe I have it in me too, but I’m too busy with the experience to think about it at great length. I can’t think of ways of making them lose.
I can only focus on so many things at a time. And right now, I enjoy my time with them, making sure I’m not out of the game by the end of the night. Or Monday. Or next week. And so on.
They may do what they do because they want me to lose. They may also do it because of their competitive nature.
And they may also behave the way they do because they want it. Like it. They like me.
And perhaps they like to lie to themselves.
For anything to work, we need to be sincere. Even if partly honest. So everything I have with them feels genuine. Despite the games and teasing. And the rest of it.
What’s disingenuous is how they act in public, but maybe that’s truthful too.
Perhaps that’s how they are.
I need to learn more about them so I can tell for sure.