The Lesbian Sex Haiku Book (With Cats!)

It’s just like “porn for

women” but with less soothing

flute music playing.

It’s like girl-girl porn,

but we don’t compliment each

other’s landing strips.

It’s like porn—we can’t

stop penetrating each other

with stilettos!

There’s not one right way

lesbians get it on. There

are, like, four at least.

Time is built in for

improv homophone lessons

and bird metaphors.

Pour the wine, light the

fire, argue over what she

said eight months ago.

Lesbian foreplay:

Strip every time Rachel

Maddow makes a pun.

It is like straight sex,

&nb

sp; but everyone ends up with

some hair in her mouth.

It’s like straight sex, but

afterward we ask ourselves,

“We just had sex, right?”

I can’t give away

the secrets but will say it