She stopped short, just around the corner of the large lunchroom, when she heard snippets of conversation
involving Morgun’s name.
“Have you met her yet? She’s nice. She’s hardly ever here, just doing casual work I think.”
“Yeah, she does some of the real estate and commercial shots. I’ve seen her, but I haven’t talked with her.”
“She’s hot.” That from a deeper, male voice. “Do you think she’s single?”
“I checked her out on social media,” the first female voice said. “You don’t have a chance. She’s not exactly into dating guys.”
“What? Really?” Then a very male groan. “All the hot ones are always taken.”
“How about the nice ones? Shouldn’t that matter? Who cares if someone’s hot if they’re an asshole?”
Laney decided to step in, since the conversation was totally benign. Just the usual workplace jabbering. She found Lucky, Kate, and Doug in the kitchen. They’d all been working there a lot longer than Laney had. They were all fairly nice too. Laney liked most of the people where she worked. She had to admit that even though the industry was so competitive, most of her coworkers felt like they weren’t competing against each other.
“Laney! Hey! Good timing,” Doug said, and good lord, she knew that she should have just turned around and walked the other direction. “We were just talking about the new girl, Morgun? That’s her name?”
Lucy nodded. “She’s nice. Don’t do it, Doug, really. Don’t say it.”
“If she’s single, you should look her up,” Doug said. He usually wasn’t a jerk and he probably wasn’t into getting fired over workplace harassment either.
Lucy groaned. “Sorry. I made the mistake of telling him that he doesn’t stand a chance because Morgun doesn’t date guys. I creeped her online, which I shouldn’t have done, but I was curious, and I shouldn’t have said anything. I wasn’t trying to start gossip.”
“No, of course not.” Laney felt something painful start in her stomach. A clawing sensation that made her chest feel like it was going to burst wide open.
“But you should. If she’s single. I mean, you’re single. If she’s single, you should ask her out.”
“Didn’t you guys do a session together?” Kate cut in. “You and Morgun?”
Laney cursed her contacts for not being able to keep their mouths shut. The photos weren’t even done yet. She’d had a teaser of one and she knew they were going to be amazing. It was something to get excited over, but she wished that it had been kept as a private excitement. Although, she’d never said that it couldn’t be mentioned. Laney found herself not wanting to talk about it. She didn’t like to discuss her private life at work, period, but something about this made the panic she felt that much worse.
“I…no. I mean, yes, we did, but it was just that. She had an idea and I liked it. It wasn’t anything more than that.”
“Are you sure?” Lucy crowed. She was more of the hopeless romantic. She’d been married for twenty years and had two kids and was kind of like Laney’s mom in that she still apparently believed in fairy tale, happily ever afters.
“Yup.” Laney nodded. “I’m sure.”
“That’s too bad! She seems super nice.”
“I’m good with being single right now. I’m too busy to think about dating someone.”
“You should never be too busy to date someone,” Doug cut in.
“I’m happy being single.”
“I’m not happy being single and somehow I never have any luck!” Doug stated. “If I were you, I’d go for it. What could be the harm in asking her out?”
“She’s probably not even single,” Kate reasoned, trying to help Laney out.
Laney gave her an appreciative look. “No one can even breathe around here or team up for an afternoon of photos without everyone assuming they’re doing something after hours.” She rolled her eyes for emphasis, but she couldn’t believe what she was saying.
Why couldn’t she just admit that she and Morgun were dating? They had never called it that, but she could say they were seeing each other and say that she’d rather keep the details private. Her coworkers would respect that. Kind of. They might only bug her now and then for minor details because they were curious, but they wouldn’t make it a big deal.
Why was she saying what she was saying? Was she that desperate to protect herself? Why was it so hard for her to just admit it? Now that it had popped out, her immediate denial that sprung to her lips from the panic and apprehension taking over her entire chest, she couldn’t exactly just snatch it back and tell everyone she’d just lied to them and that yes, she and Morgun were on the verge of being a couple, if they weren’t already.
Something about realizing that, about actually thinking it and saying the words, even in her own head, made Laney feel like she was standing on the edge of everything she’d so carefully constructed coming down on her. All the women she’d dated in the past, she’d basically sabotaged all those relationships by working too much. Her drive had always overwhelmed them. Things just didn’t work out.