something that isn’t there. That’s what this process is about.
Meeting new people. Learning about yourself. Not settling
when you know it’s not right. You’re paying for our services,
not the other way around, so don’t apologize.”
Steph relaxes and I don’t turn around to get our drinks
until I can see that she understands that it’s okay that
sometimes things don’t work out. I feel guilty for being happy
that the spark wasn’t there for her.
But it’s never going to be me. She’s attracted to men.
She’s looking for a male partner. A boyfriend. A husband. Not
a female. Not me.
I use the time while our drinks are being prepared –
two peach iced teas because they’re fantastic – to compose
myself and get back on track. As in, the only track that I can
get back on. The track where I find Steph a successful match.
A match that I can watch her face light up over. Someone she
gets excited about. Someone who is absolutely perfect for her
and will make her happy.
Some days, I really hate my job. Most days I like it. It’s
just this that I can’t stand.
“Here we go. One peach iced tea. If this doesn’t change
your entire life, I’m not sure you like iced tea.”
Steph laughs, then takes a sip. Instant amazement
washes over her face, and good lord, she’s beautiful. She’s
wearing a grey t-shirt with a possum on the front and a pair of
black leggings and flip flops, her hair in a messy bun at the
nape of her neck and absolutely no makeup at all, and she’s
stunning. Of course she’s stunning.
I think she might be the most beautiful woman I’ve
ever seen.