“I wanted to wait until morning,” she began, not looking at me. “I’d hoped to have everything figured out by then.”
Figured out? What was she talking about?
“I was wrong to push you away or to make your feelings sound less valid than my own,” she said when I didn’t reply. “I can’t risk the other wolves overhearing, but my feelings for you are as strong as yours are for me. It isn’t something I can turn off, and it was wrong of me to suggest otherwise. For that, I apologize.”
“But that isn’t why you came out here.”
As much as I needed to hear it and as much as I wanted to run with her then, there was something else she hadn’t told me. Something important. I could hear it in the tightness of her voice and see it whenever she refused to meet my gaze.
“No,” she agreed, releasing a long breath. “The moon is nearly full. I can already feel its tug on my fur. As much as we hate to admit it, the phases of the moon play a strong part in
how we feel. Some wolves get more restless around the full moon. Others more agitated.”
“And which one are you?” I asked, glancing up at the sky before looking at her again.
“A little bit of both. I wanted to run, but there’s only one wolf I want to run with. Of course, this only complicates things further as it isn’t something I can hide.”
“So don’t,” I said, padding over to her so I could nuzzle under her chin.
She shrunk away from my touch, her ears lowered. “You don’t understand.”
“No, I do. But Ash needs to realize that this heart isn’t hers to have. It hasn’t been hers in months, and I can’t be blamed for something like that.”
“It isn’t that. I mean, it is, but that isn’t what brought me out here.” She released a frustrated sigh and tried again, this time with a little more success. “My biggest fear right now is that once the moon wanes, my feelings for you will change.”
“But you felt this way about me before the moon was even full.” According to her, she’d felt this way about me nearly a month before. After the last full moon.
“Yes, but not as strongly as I do now. The moon can play tricks.”
“So you’re pushing me away again.”
She nipped my fur and tugged on my ear when I went to turn away. “No. I’ve gotten used to ignoring the needs of my heart and fighting off the pull of the moon, but it isn’t something I can fight back any longer. I shouldn’t have to.”
“So what are you saying?”
“Run with me.” Her voice shook at the end, but when I met her gaze, I knew her invitation came from her and not just her wolf. “I’m tired of hiding. I’m tired of putting my needs aside for someone else. My heart aches at the thought of hurting Ash, but that pain cannot compare to the hurt I put you through earlier. Please, let me do this for you. For us.”
My heart swelled at the invitation, but I didn’t move. “I was going to leave,” I told her. “Once I’m well enough to do so, I was going to return to the city.”
“But your place is here,” she said without looking at me.
“With the pack.”
“I have a life there,” I explained. “A job.”
“One you can easily do out here.” She paused then, closing her eyes as she spoke. “Were you really going to leave?”
“This is no place for Val,” I said, my voice breaking at the end. “She’s done everything for me. She’s the reason I survived for so long. If I ever lost her—”
“You won’t,” Fallen said quickly. “She could stay here with you.”
I laughed at that. “You can’t say that. Only the Alpha can.”
“I know.” When she looked at me then, her expression was one I couldn’t read. “Ash has already voiced the possibility of Val becoming a permanent part of our staff. Because of your sister’s work, we got our Alpha back. The rest of the pack has already welcomed her. A human.” She shook her head, clearly amused. “It’s amazing, really.”
“But they haven’t accepted me,” I reminded her.
She nudged me under my chin, then licked my cheek fur.