“It's okay, because I know the truth.” I look into his eyes as they meet mine. “Because I know you love me too, that’s what kicked this whole thing off, isn’t it? You berated me for being jealous of Winter and then you went and did the same thing. It’s why you came at me crazy last night and accused me of trying to replace you.”
No…
But that’s exactly what had happened. I’d already been raging since he and Winter had looked at each other the other day. I hadn’t approached him when I wanted to, deciding to let it go after conversing with Lucia made me feel like a fool.
I’ve never been afraid to look like one before then, but I’d kept control this time.
But then I’d gone into my room last night and hadn’t found Enzo waiting in my bed.
That’d been the last straw to break this camel’s fucking back.
He wasn’t in my bed and all I could think about was that fucking look.
And I’d just lost it.
Attacked him and then went on a binger.
“I called you a thousand times and you didn’t answer. I was worried that you were hurt, the same way you burst in here to make sure I was okay.”
“I lost my phone,” I mutter, the words feeling like they’re coming from someone else's mouth. “I was drunk and I lost it at the club.”
His face twists and I know he wants to ask if I was with someone else. Because that’s what I do to hurt him, I go off and fuck other people.
“I couldn’t get it up,” I tell him and I realize I’m trying to reassure him. In the worst way possible.
The truth is I’d gone on the prowl, not even knowing what the fuck I wanted, a man, a woman, both? It hadn’t mattered, I’d just wanted to fuck something until my anger was gone. But then I’d gotten fucked up and when a woman had approached me to fuck, I hadn’t even been able to get it up.
I hadn’t known if it was because of the beer or the vicious thoughts swirling in my head.
Now, I know that it’s the latter.
“You think that makes me happy?” He asks, his eyes burning into me. “That you didn’t fuck around because your dick wouldn’t get hard?” He scoffs, shaking his head.
He shoves a hand in my chest and I allow him to, backing away from him. He flies by me, heading to the door and I want to stop him, but my feet won’t move.
I fucking love you.
Why did he have to say it?
He rests his hand on the doorframe, his back heaving as he takes a deep breath. He doesn’t turn around and look at me. “You’re going to have to figure out what it is you want from this, Maximo. Things are different now, and we haven’t even addressed the real elephant in the room.”
Real elephant.
My brows pull together at the same time that he finally turns his head to look at me. “Winter,” he breathes out, watching me. That same rage comes rearing its head, but there’s also something else, something unnamable.
“We’re playing a new game these days and if you want to keep me, you better figure out the rules real fucking quick.”