“Thank you for meeting me, Jacolby.”
Once upon a time, I admired Annette Reid. I admired her cutthroat nature to achieve her dreams no matter the obstacles blocking her way. I admired her devotion for family, especially the love she poured on to her sons. I admired her success as a black woman making the unattainable in the world of architecture possible for other women of color. On paper she is and will forever be the woman who’s talked about and celebrated.
But internally, she was so ugly.
Crows' feet and strands of grey hair were the only indications that the woman before me was aging but gracefully and beautifully. Besides her horrendous sense of fashion like my mother’s, I used to get so giddy knowing that this woman was one day going to be my mother-in-law. Having a seat at her table of knowledge and wisdom used to give me chills because I was so eager to learn from someone who had already ran the race so I could walk.
Funny how life changes those perceptions.
Annette Reid the mogul and businesswoman, I fan-girled over her something serious. I’d never discredit her hard work and dedication to building a company that’s been in her family for over five generations. However, Annette Reid the wife and mother, I wasn’t a fan of at all.
Though she requested my presence for brunch I’d arrived thirty minutes early to make sure things were in place. Things such as our table, food, and drinks. I wanted no interruptions once she sat down. We had pertinent things to discuss. Not only that I was on a timeclock restraint. I needed to get back to my man.
“After Paxton retold his conversation with you, I can’t say that I’m surprised we’re sitting here. I know how much your sons mean to you, so this is your attempt at trying to get back in his life, right?”
Downing a hearty sip of her mimosa, Annette shifted looking around the open restaurant. “In short, yes. But I also wanted to apologize to you.” Placing her flute down she blinked back the guilt that’s been swimming around her eyes since she sat down. “I never took the time to get to know you before I judged you. All of my assumptions were based off…” she cleared her throat, nervous to speak her truth. I smirked knowing exactly what she was referring to. “I’ve never met a woman like you, Jacolby. Never. Between your choice of clothing, carefree and lively personality. In my mind that wasn’t what Paxton needed in a wife especially the wife of a CFO.”
Last night Paxton asked if he could dress me. When we were back in college, he’d do it sometimes when he took me out on surprise dates, so it was nice to have him dress me again. Getting ready for summer, I treated myself to a shopping spree on SHEIN and one of my jumpsuits is the one he picked out. A front crisscross halter backless tie hem jumpsuit to be exact. And the color – orange. My heels were high as the sky and gold with crystal embellishments. Then my hair of course was wild as it could get. The only thing I tamed was switching my usual matte red lipstick to a creamy butter gloss. Gold bangles on both arms. Large hoop earrings because I was giving nothing but big hoop energy. And a matching orange clutch.
My baby dressed me damn good if I say so myself.
I felt good. Felt sexy and confident as I always do.
But most of all I was me.
I wasn’t about to change to appease this woman. Especially a woman that wasn’t buying my clothes or paying to get my hair done.
“Let’s be honest, Annette. You still don’t think too highly of me.” Her brows raised as if I told a lie, but she kept her mouth shut. “Only reason you’re here is like I said, you want to be in Paxton’s life, and as his mother, you should have that privilege, but you and I know that he’s not that complex. He loves hard and protects those he loves harder. He and I have been one flesh since he left your home at eighteen. No, we’re not married yet, but what God has joined together no man can put asunder. In this case a woman. You tried to tear apart what God ordained and now there is strife between you and your son. How is that going for you?” I popped a crab ball in my mouth.
Oouu, those are good.
She dabbed her eyes, and I took a bite out of my conch waffle. I was definitely getting a to-go order.
“I stopped trying to understand why you don’t like me. Tried to rack my brain around what I had done to make you despise me so. I’m intelligent as you are, probably more. I can control a boardroom with the wealthiest tycoon. Never been after your money. Never bad-mouthed Paxton or your family. I fear God more than anyone, so it’s not my faith. But then after reuniting with my Pi, I realized it didn’t matter how I dressed or acted. You were going to find a reason to hate me because another one of your sons was moving on with life, as they should, without you.” Jalonie and Reese told me not to be so harsh, but I couldn’t help it. This woman needed a reality check and I got signed up for the job.
Breaking all table etiquette rules I rested my elbows on the table and placed my chin on my clasped hands. “Kandon joined the company with no issue after college and married the woman he chose. Quest had no interest to be involved with the business at all. He even refuses to come back home to North Carolina because you’re too imposing when it comes to his personal life. Quincey is another who made it blatantly clear that he would never work for Monarch. He even went to college in Florida and hasn’t moved back to stay away from your judgmental ways. Then there’s my lover. You saw that he was about to be another ready to flee out of your web so you spoke to his dreams as only a mother could. You had for a short period but see, God is bigger than you and your plans for Paxton’s life. Then there is sweet Kameron. He’s about to branch off and make his own plans without you. That terrifies you. Pretty much you lost all your sons to your selfishness. Haven't you had enough? Do you not see what you trying to control their lives is doing?” I had to dab my eyes after saying all of that.
I loathed it when parents couldn’t cut the cord. These were grown men. Successful grown men that she wanted to still control and manipulate for her own benefit. What has she really gained by doing so?
“Wow.” She chuckled sadly downing her drink and pouring herself another. “As you young kids say nowadays you read me to filth. I-I…everything you said is absolutely right.” From the large lump she swallowed, I could tell it was hard for her to admit that. I mean who likes having a mirror shoved in their face so they can see their ugly truth? “My sons mean everything to me, and I’ve done the same thing my mother to did to me. Control is addictive. It feels good to hold that certain amount of power but seeing the effects.” Shaking her head, she wiped a tear. “It wasn’t worth it.”
“The Lord hasn’t taken you yet so there is an opportunity to fix the relationships with your sons. It’s not too late.” When it came to Quest, I wasn’t sure. He’s a completely different breed from his brothers. “I’m not looking for us to be best friends or for you to be a mother to me. The one I have stresses me out but she’s enough. As long as you respect me, and my relationship with your son, and don’t cross any more boundaries. I have no problem being cordial with you. I’m not going anywhere, Annette. I need you to understand that.”
I wasn’t looking for her to accept anything. I’d never force anyone to understand or accept what Paxton and I shared, but what wasn’t non-negotiable was respect. If she couldn’t do that then oh well.
I tried.
“I understand completely, and I respect you more today than I ever have.” Poor thing was an emotional crying lush. “Thank you, Jacolby. I see why my son loves you and feels safe with you. You don’t play no games.” She chuckled refilling her glass again.
“Not when it comes to my man I don’t.” Lifting my flute, I offered a toast. “Cheers to forgiveness, boundaries, and renewed love.”
* * *
Bright lights blinded me.Heart beating faster than the adrenaline rush of riding a rollercoaster. Mouth dry. I rolled my neck hoping to release the need to vomit. For a moment, I closed my eyes and prayed that when I opened my mouth, only words came out, not my breakfast.
“Lord, I thank you,” I whispered. “Jacolby Jefferson Junior, that’s me.” I chuckled as they clapped. “Since the day I was born I’ve had to convince and prove to people who only saw a name on paper that I am a woman. Not just a woman, but a black woman. My sister is named Jalonie Jefferson. Yeah, my father had complete control over our names.” The crowd laughed. “My parents had a goal in mind when it came to the number of children they wanted. Two. Blessed with a girl the first time, they held off knowing the gender of their second until birth. My Father already made it known that whether boy or girl this last child would carry his name. His legacy.
“It wasn’t until the age of sixteen that I appreciated being named after my father. My history teacher at the time gave us an assignment to write a paper on an influential African American leader. My choice was Frederick Douglas. Knowledge is the pathway from slavery to freedom. His devotion to helping slaves and educating them struck a chord of appreciation and admiration within me for my Father. Most people in the finance world see my name and assume it is my father they are doing business with. If I had a penny for every shocked expression or need to assure my qualifications, I’d be richer than Oprah. I, Jacolby Jefferson Jr, am named after a man who lived inside libraries to educate himself on mathematics. I am the product of a black man who fought against the threats on his family to achieve his goal; to become the first black branch manager for Kierger Bank. I am the product of a black man, who instilled the importance of education and having a voice.