Jonas
Seattle, Washington
Ileft New York City as soon as the ink was dry on the contracts for Leeann DeSoto. Something felt wrong about hiring her after all that had happened, but I didn’t have time to vet more people. Despite Kenzie’s accusations, the chef came highly recommended by her previous boss, and it was someone we knew well in the Titan world. I signed my part of the documents and headed straight to Seattle on my private plane. I still didn’t feel too well, although I had no idea why. Maybe this was what stress did to someone. I thought I had a handle on things in the past, but this past week or two had proven me wrong.
I was possibly coming down with something, and if the change of scenery in Washington didn’t help, I would reach out to Kristopher to see if he could figure out what was wrong with me. There had to be something if for no other reason than the fact that I hadn’t picked up a woman since the competition ended, nor had I allowed my normal flight attendant to distract me mid-air as I so often did. I got to the hotel where I’d be staying and despite the fact that I had the numbers of four different women in the area, I hadn’t even though about using any of them.
I was now in my bed looking out the window at the Space Needle. The landmark was alit in magenta, and as I locked in on the beams of colored light, a sharp piercing pain reverberated in my skull. I’d gotten a few of these headaches since my fight with Kenzie. I thought the first time or two had been because of her, yet here I was, almost two weeks later. This had to be tension which would hopefully abate in the coming days. If it didn’t, I would need to see someone.
“Just my fucking luck,” I cursed under my breath.
I turned onto my side and now my sight was set on the cream colored walls of my bedroom suite. It was certainly more calming, and the longer I stared at nothing, the more familiar it became to me. Lately, I had been dealing with more than these ungodly headaches. I also had trouble concentrating on almost anything. I was nauseous, and experiencing bouts of stomach issues, but thankfully they went away within a day or so of getting them. For all I knew, I might’ve been food poisoned. I should’ve checked with Kristopher, but I had decided to go at it alone. Now, I was finally starting to feel a little more like myself.
Tomorrow, I would have the first set of meetings with some investors. I wanted to take advantage of Seattle’s natural beauty and add another west coast property in the process. “I’m not sure adding a location there will serve Courtland the best right now,” one of my grandfather’s long-term advisers had told me the minute I had mentioned this location.
“On the contrary, I think it will be perfect. It’s conveniently located, and we stand to attract both domestic and international travelers, especially with its proximity to Canada.”
I hadn’t really cared whether the man had liked it or not. My grandfather had left me in charge, so he obviously saw something in me that he didn’t in those he considered his closest confidantes. I was the CEO, so while the board could delay projects, they couldn’t stop them from ultimately happening, which was something they came to realize during the first year I’d worked here.
It’d been hell trying to navigate around the corporate red tape, but I had, and the places I had developed were some of our most profitable resorts in all the portfolio. I might’ve been a screw up most of my life, but once I settled down and focused on my studies back at Stanford, I poured everything into those classes and emerged more qualified than these very men who dared to question me.
I closed my eyes. I wouldn’t let the upcoming meeting scheduled for the morning upset me. It was likely my dread over the whole damn thing that had my head aching the way it was. I had been working on these numbers for months and I was confident I would be able to sell the others on my vision, too.
You could sell hay to a farmer, a soft voice inside of my head echoed.
I kept my eyes closed and knew exactly whose voice it was, and when. Kenzie and I had been at a park back in Houston. She used to like to be out in nature, so I had made sure to do a lot of outdoorsy things with her. Sometimes, we did nothing more than throw a blanket onto the ground and sit under one of those magnificent oak trees near the school.
The first time she had muttered those words, I had been telling her how worried I was about telling my father where I wanted to play football. She’d been so attentive, and listened to me discuss the pros and cons. She’d always been an objective and calming influence on me.
“Hay to a farmer?”I’d asked, and she’d giggled.
“I have Midwestern roots,” she’d finally answered. “Besides, I would think you’d know a thing or two about farms in Texas.”
Our worlds were so completely different. I was born into a very wealthy family and the closest I came to a farm was the horse barn at the edge of our massive property. I was never much of a rider myself, but my mother was. She was an equestrian, and had even won numerous awards and medals in her youth. She’d tried to pass down her love of it to her sons, but I hadn’t been interested. I enjoyed sports and adventure.
“So, I take it you aren’t a cowboy?” she’d also asked.
I had rolled her underneath me, then lightly kissed her lips. She was a virgin, so I had done all the right things and said all the right words to keep her hanging on. “No, unless you count Halloween costumes over the years. Would you like to see me in a hat and pair of boots?”
She’d shaken her head, then pulled my mouth back to hers. Looking back, there’d been a warmth that emanated from her, but I had thrown it all away for bragging rights. I still didn’t know what it’d been that I felt for her, but there was something there beside the usual sexual lust.
You’re a bad boy, Jonas.The voice now echoed through my head, but it hadn’t been Kenzie’s. It was a female’s, and as I tried to recall whose it was, another sound pierced the memory before it disappeared.
I opened my eyes and rolled onto my back. I ran my hand through my hair. It was getting long, and I was in desperate need of a cut. I had a barber in the city, and after tomorrow’s meeting, I planned to book an appointment.
I was tired of just sitting here in the room, but I didn’t feel like mingling with anyone. After the shit had gone down in high school with Kenzie, I had withdrawn from friends and activities that I often enjoyed, including sex. It seemed no matter how many years passed, I seemed to be repeating history once more. I got up and walked to the mini fridge. I needed to stop thinking about the fight we had before she stormed out. I had every right to be mad at her this time. She was the one who’d broken into my room, then she had the nerve to accuse others of doing the same thing she had done.
“I need you to know that me doing what I did with you last night wasn’t some ploy to try to influence your decision,”she’d told me the morning after. She’d looked and sounded so sincere. I hadn’t even thought she was capable of something like that, but did I actually know her any more? Did I ever actually know her to begin with?
That question had me pacing back and forth until I finally stopped in front of the wet bar. Grabbing a small bottle of whiskey, I opened it and swallowed the contents inside in one swig. I then tossed it into the garbage can, completely missing it altogether.
“I lost the love and respect of my parents and siblings... I was labeled crazy and sent to a psychiatric ward for over a year, where instead of walking down the aisle and accepting my diploma, I was being poked and prodded, and force-fed medicine.”
That was also something she’d told me, and as her words repeated themselves over in my head, I hung mine in shame.
I was patting myself on the back for declining party invitations and refraining from sex for a few weeks while her entire life was in shambles. After a short amount of time, I had picked back up where I’d left off as if nothing had ever happened. As if we’d never happened. And after I moved to California, I had tried to pretend she had never been in my life to begin with. It had almost worked until she’d shown up at the hotel in Manhattan.
“We’re grown adults and all of that is in the past.”Kenzie had said it so convincingly, but hearing the anguish in her voice the day I caught her in my room relayed something much different.