Mattias and Elias exchange looks.
“Angry? No,” Mattias says. “Worried, yes.”
“Why? I thought you, of all people, would be happy at what I did today. I got vengeance. For me, and for all of us. You’re free now!”
“We are no more free than we were, and nor are you,” Mattias says. “Get in the bath before it goes cold.”
I find myself pouting. What I did to the sheriff was shocking, even to myself. It was monumental. People have been wanting that asshole dead for more than a decade, and I did it. But nobody around me seems to be impressed, much less appreciative. A monster is dead. It has to be a good thing.
For once, I don’t argue with them. I do want a bath. More than that, I want to be cared for. I want to feel... I don’t know. What is it I want? Approval, forgiveness, praise?
I shed the red dress now crimson with drying blood and I step into the bath. Mattias and Elias kneel on either side and wash me, saying calm little words and soothing phrases.
“There there, raise your arms, that’s right...”
“Good girl, lie back...”
“Close your eyes, I don’t want to get water in them...”
Totally pedestrian phrases uttered in low masculine tones settle my nerves. The warm water washes away the blood, and slowly helps the aches and tightness in my muscles fade away too. I lie back, naked and let Mattias and Elias rub me down, their big hands soothing my stress.
What have I done? What have I become? And what will become of me? There are so many questions, each larger than the last, but for the moment, I don’t need to answer any of them.
I let my eyes close. I let them take care of me. I sleep.