“Me neither,” I whispered.
Arran kissed me then, deep and hungering, and I fell into it, relief and pleasure melting away the panic that had clung to me for the last few hours.
When he released me, he said, “But I won’t keep this a secret. I want to date you, and I want everyone to know.”
My pulse skittered at the thought of everyone throwing their opinions into the mix. Of having them watch us interact. Yet, I knew Arran was right. We couldn’t stay in the shadows if we wanted to make a real go of it. “Okay,” I agreed.
“But first, before we tell everyone and invite our family into our relationship—because you know that’ll happen with those nosy buggers—I want to take you on a proper date. Tomorrow night. North Star.”
North Star was a fancy restaurant a few miles up the coast. This just got real! “All right.”
He grinned hugely. “Aye?”
I laughed at his giddiness. “Yes.”
He kissed me again, one quick kiss after the other, as if he couldn’t get enough. “I’ll pick you up at seven.”
“I’ll be there.” I reluctantly stepped out of his hold. “I better go.”
Arran beamed boyishly. “See you soon, gorgeous.”
“See you soon.” I turned on my heel to walk away but couldn’t resist looking over my shoulder before I disappeared around the corner. Arran was still there, watching me with that flirty smile curling his mouth. I laughed under my breath and gave him a little wave before I walked out of sight.
Excitement, fear, thrill, affection, desire, worry, hope—it all bubbled inside me as I drove home to my woodsy haven.
My haven. Arran should know that was what my lodge was to me. And he should know why.
But I didn’t think I could bring the pain and darkness of that life into my new one.
Which meant there would forever be a part of me I couldn’t give him, and I didn’t know how long Arran could handle that. Was he an all-or-nothing kind of guy?
I guessed I’d soon find out.
21
EREDINE
I couldn’t remember the last time I’d made out in a car. It had to have been in high school. I smiled at the thought as Arran swept me up in his intoxicating kisses. He pulled back to murmur, “What’s the smile for?”
I shrugged, a little giddy. “This is nice. Making out in your car.”
He grinned. “It’s very nice.”
“With a view like that too.” I gestured out the windshield to the North Sea. Moonlight glimmered across the water beyond the cliff we’d parked on.
The entire night had been surreal. Arran picked me up wearing a suit that fitted him to perfection. I wore a purple dress with a conservative neck- and hemlines, but it was sleeveless and contouring, so still pretty sexy. My four-inch heels made me the same height as him. He’d kissed me so hungrily at the door, I’d had to reapply my lipstick and use a cleansing wipe to wash the plum-colored stain off his lips.
We’d kissed every inch of the lip color off after an amazing seafood dinner at North Star. If anyone we knew from the village was there, we didn’t see them. Then again, we weren’t looking, so completely into each other. Arran talked about the Gloaming and some of his travels; I chatted about work, his family, and life in LA, without delving too deeply. He seemed to sense my reluctance to go there and swiftly changed the subject.
He also flirted outrageously with me, but Arran Adair had been doing that from the moment we met.
He stroked a thumb across my mouth. “That view out there doesn’t compare to the one I have in here.”
I rolled my eyes, chuckling at the overt flattery, but secretly, I loved it.
Arran smiled but continued, “I’m serious. When I saw you at Lachlan’s wedding last year, it was like waking up after years of being asleep. I’d never seen anyone so stunning in my whole life.”
My cheeks grew heated at the compliment and also at the reminder of the wedding, because I hadn’t been paying attention to Arran that night. I’d been too preoccupied with Brodan. That felt wrong now. Guilt rode my shoulders, even though my crush on Brodan had been obliterated by my feelings for Arran.
Deflecting, I said lightly, “We met before the wedding. You do remember that, right? Several times.”
He chuckled. “I do. But I … I’m ashamed to admit I was in my own wee world for far too long. I couldn’t see a damn thing in front of me. If I had, if I’d seen you then like I should have, I don’t think I would have left again.”
His confession made my breath catch. Like his words last night, it suggested a depth of feeling that both exhilarated and terrified me. “Arran,” I whispered, reaching for another kiss.
After a while, we drew apart, and he leaned his forehead against mine.