12
Tegyn
“I’m sorry,”I murmured to D after an incredibly quiet lunch.
“Why?” he asked with a frown as he reached out and laid his hand on mine.
I stared at it, embarrassed by how much I relished his touch. Sure, he was warm and comforting. His hands were large enough to completely encompass mine, but mostly, I loved the way he made me feel…so safe and cared for. I stood to pick up our plates and nodded toward Keyon, who was doing the sleepy kid head nod. “What if I clean up while you lay him down for a nap?”
D stood. “Good plan.” He reached for his son, but the little boy pushed his hands away. “What? You don’t want a nap?”
“No, I want her. Her carry me.” He smiled at me and held out his hands.
I looked at D for a reaction. He seemed embarrassed by the boy’s actions. “I’m new,” I explained. “Give it a couple of days and I won’t be all shiny and new anymore.” With a shrug, I reached for Keyon. “Plus,” I added happily, “this gives us an excuse to move me into my new room.”
With a grin, D strode to the laundry room to collect my bags while I started up the stairs with the little guy. “Which room is yours?” I asked as I realized there were rooms both directions from the top of the stairs.
“There!” He pointed toward the end of the hall to the left.
“Okay, here we go.” I wandered down the hall while he clung to my neck. For some reason, I felt like he might need some nurturing from a woman. When I reached the end of the hall, I realized I’d found the master bedroom. “Not this one.”
Keyon laughed. “Naw! There!” And he pointed to the room to my right, so I turned and realized I’d found the place.
“Here,” I murmured as I pulled back the covers and laid him on his mattress. “Get some rest. We can play when you wake up.” Without thinking, I covered him up, and pressed my lips to his forehead. When I pulled back, his eyes were squeezed shut and he had a smile on his face.
Standing in the doorway was D. And if I didn’t know better, I’d think he had tears in his eyes. I walked over to him and smiled shyly. “He’s tucked in.”
After clearing his throat, D murmured, “Your room is right here.” He pointed to the one directly across the hall.
I nodded. “Right next to yours,” I noted quietly.
“Yeah. For now,” he teased.
“Because you plan to move me to the other end of the hall?” I guessed with an eye roll.
D dropped my luggage on the bed, which was already made up and wrapped his arms around me. “No, Tegyn. Because I plan to move you into my room.”
I swallowed hard. “You’re still married,” I reminded him again.
“You think I don’t know that?” He shook his head sadly. “I know. I feel it every day. So much regret.” He blew out a breath and stared out my door. “That little boy is the only good to ever come out of me being with Camilla. And even then, I look at him and wish he was ours.” He swallowed hard and looked away.
“He could’ve been,” I admitted as I unzipped my first suitcase and started carrying clothes to the dresser across from the bed.
D inhaled sharply. “What you mean?”
“Well, we didn’t use any protection. We could’ve totally had a baby together.” I avoided looking at him even though I could feel his eyes burning into me.
“Yes, we did. Didn’t we?” He moved closer and laid a hand on my arm.
I laughed. “No. We tried one time and your penis shrank in protest at the condom. And I wasn’t on the pill…so, yeah. We could’ve had a baby together.”
Reaching out, D turned me to face him. “And you’d be okay with that?”
I licked my lips, choosing my words carefully. “If you mean would I be okay having a baby with the man I loved, then yes. I still hope to do that one day.” His eyes widened. “Only, I plan to be married. I’m not going to be some dirty secret.”
“How could anyone not be proud to be with you?” he asked, his voice incredulous.
“Well, he could be married to someone else and making me his side-piece.” I leaned in and whispered, “I’m the marrying kind, remember? I’ll never make that mistake again.”